Thank you for all your reviews everyone!!

*Hugs everyone* hehehe.... sorry for the very very long wait... that was bad of me... yeah.... I'll try not to do it again...
You see, I'm very busy at the moment and having a sever case of writers block that just refuses to go away... sometimes I read a certain point and I just can't find the words to go on... I hate writers block....

I'll do my best to fix up the grammar and vocab... sorry... *bows head* I'm not very smart...
Don't worry, I wont go all first person on you... I have difficulties expressing myself in first person... I find third person better
Well, we are one review away from the 50 review mark!!! *sobs* my dream is finally coming true.... so happy...
I know... Ruri is a bit of one of the girls... but like... she needs to be realistic, right? I'll stop using the Japanese words... I wasn't too sure whether or not I should use them... but I'll stop seeing as it's not really necessary.
AngelofLight1, I would love to hand over my writers block so that you could smash it with a sledgehammer, but unfortunately, I cannot seem to pick it up and throw it away...
I should stop talking and get on with the story... okay here it comes...

Kisaki:

He watched as Ruri's frown curved and she smiled, wiping away her tears, "Gomen..." she smiled, "I'm sorry I didn't trust you."

Taisuke beamed, enclosing the gap between them and holding her tightly against him, never wanting to let go...

"Aishiteru, Ruri..." he whispered

Ruri smiled, listening to his heart beating in his chest, soaking herself in his presence, "Aishiteru..." she whispered in return, "Please... never let me go..."

-+-

Chapter Twelve: Emperor's Demise

Ruri sat in the sun, listening to Taisuke's heart beat steadily as he slept lightly.

She smiled, tracing the line of his jaw, giggling as he shifted and flinched under her touch.

Forgotten documents lay strewn about the grass after their game of hide and seek and she moved to gather them but felt an arm tighten about her waist.

She turned back to Taisuke who watched her sleepily.

"Don't worry about it..." he mumbled, "They'll be fine..."

"But the wind-." Ruri tried to reason.

Taisuke smiled and pointed to the sky, "Got it covered..."

Ruri smiled in return but she still looked at the parchments on the ground.

Taisuke released her and smiled, "Can't stand mess, can you?"

Ruri felt her heart melt at that smile and she didn't feel she could stand.

"Suddenly don't want to tidy up?" he asked impishly.

"No." Ruri blushed, turning away and moving towards the closest of the papers. "I just..."

Taisuke looked at her expectantly, "Just what?"

She shook her head, "Never mind..."

Taisuke got to his feet and embraced Ruri, "Can't stand to be away from me?" he whispered in her ear.

Ruri felt the blood rise to her cheeks, "No... I... Don't think so much of yourself..." she replied flustered and she heard Taisuke chuckle.

Taisuke looked up at the sun, and Ruri watched as his jaw clenched, "The Prince will be expecting you soon..." he mumbled.

Ruri took his hand in her own, "I love only you..." she reassured him.

Taisuke smiled, "I know..."

-+-

Ruri sat beside Arinori who held her hand in her own whilst talking to an envoy from his southern borders.

Taisuke sat on the other side of her, watching Arinori's hand fiercely, while still concentrating on the conversion. From the corner of her eye, Ruri could see his jaw clench and unclench, but apart from the small flaw, his features remained emotionless, like the sorcerer he was meant to be.

"My Prince, I'm sorry to report but there has been some disturbance on the southern borders."

Ruri turned her attention back to the envoy at his last comment.

"The Rimani seem to grow restless and there have been countless raids on the farms close to the border..." the envoy continued, his voice almost pleading.

"What?" Arinori answered, a shocked expression plastered on is face, the colour slowly fading. "What of the peace treaty with the Rimani?"

The envoy shook his head, dark hair falling over his eyes, "I'm afraid they do not consider it a binding document any longer, My Prince."

"Why ever not?"

"I'm not sure, Your Grace, but it has something to do with their religious beliefs... Many of the Rimani who live on our side of the border have made the pilgrimage home for something that we cannot discover... they all seem to be tightlipped about it.... no matter the methods of persuasion we use..." he stated hesitantly and sadly.

Arinori let go of Ruri's hand and raised it to his head, rubbing his temple in a circular motion and looking very much like an old man.

"I do not mean to be rude or prying, Your Grace, but I do believe that the eastern and western borders are experiencing the same problems..."

Taisuke nodded and answered for Arinori, "You are the third person to come here complaining about natives, rebels and everything else of the sort, Lord Ito. It seems that there is something that is going on that only the people of Kamikawa know nothing about...."

"I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, Your Grace."

Arinori shook his head, "It is good that you have brought us this news, we need to know what is happening in the places beyond our reach... Thank-you Lord Ito. Perhaps you would grace us with your presence for a few days before heading back to your post."

The Envoy beamed, "You honour me, Your Grace."

Arinori nodded and Lord Ito rose from his seat to be shown to a room by a page. When he left the room, Arinori turned to Taisuke.

"Could you Search the borders tonight, Sorcerer?" Arinori asked.

"It is a far distance, but I can try..." Taisuke replied, uncertainty filling his cold voice.

"Please. Try. I do not want to inform my father of this until it is absolutely necessary..." Arinori sighed, letting go of Ruri's hand and walking over to the window, "There is enough trouble as it is and there is no need to place more worry on his shoulders."

"It is not a good idea to be leaving things to the last straw, My Lord..."

"We cannot tell him, Taisuke... I cannot put him in more worry than he already is... I would not forgive myself if he left us with more worry than necessary upon his shoulders." Arinori looked pleadingly at Taisuke, "Promise me you wont tell him, Tai-kun."

Ruri looked back at Taisuke who had leant back in his seat, eyes closed and wearing a pensive look. He shook his head and looked up at Arinori, green eyes flashing with annoyance, defiance and... loyalty. He sighed deeply and sat up, "I promise not to tell the Emperor."

Arinori smiled gratefully. "Thank-you... By the way, are you visiting him later tonight."

Taisuke nodded.

"Tell him that I... that I'm thinking of him...." he said before turning to look at Ruri. "You should get some rest... we have things to discuss tomorrow, my Love."

Ruri nodded blankly, suddenly finding her hands interesting.

Arinori turned back to Taisuke, "Would you mind accompanying her back to her chambers, Taisuke?"

Taisuke stood without a word and gestured for Ruri to follow him out. Slowly she stood and linked her arm with his following him out of the room and leaving a depressed Prince standing solemnly by the window

-+-

"...the Emperor's health is declining... you can see it in his stature and in his eyes... he knows that his time will come soon... perhaps too soon...."

Ruri looked up at Taisuke whose face remained impassive.

"...Ryozo's been to visit him once... but Arinori refuses..."

"Why?"

"... I think he can't bear to see him in this state... and he also doesn't want to feel guilt when he takes the crown...."

"What state?" The fire crackled noisily, flames leaping and dancing in an exotic dance.

Taisuke's face contorted uncomfortably, "For as long as I can remember," he said quietly, "Arinori has always looked up to and idolized his father... if you saw the Emperor now, you'd see that it's a huge difference from the paintings out in the hallways... I've noticed that Arinori spends a lot of time staring at those paintings these days, as well as pacing outside the Emperor's room... I think he wants to remember his father as a powerful and strong man who could not be beaten by anything and not the sick and dying man he is now...." Taisuke sighed, "He thinks that if he saw his father now, his whole image of that powerful man will be forgotten and he doesn't want that... It is really a pity for him not to see his father in these crucial moments."

"And Ryozo?"

"Keizo was never much of a father to Ryozo... and Ryozo has never looked up to anyone... he believes that the only person to try to be like is himself... so seeing Keizo the way he is, isn't that much of a shock to his psyche. Arinori is a whole different story... I don't know what to tell the Emperor or how to convince Arinori to see his father..."

"What about you?"

Taisuke's arms tightened around Ruri holding her closer to himself. "I'm visiting him tonight... each time I visit I don't know what to expect. I go in there every time expecting to see the mirror image of me, but each time I come out I'm left with the image of a withered, old, dying man."

Ruri let her head fall back on his shoulder, listening to his calm voice as he spoke.

"Sometimes I wonder whether I'll be like that when I grow older... whether or not I'll be dying, old and wrinkled on my bedside with no one to be there for me in these last important moments of my life... I fear that scene and I fear what it must be like to be in Keizo's situation."

Ruri turned her head slightly so she could see Taisuke as he stared stoically at the fire. "You know you wont end in that situation, Taisuke. You're too smart for that... And besides...." she said nonchalantly, " if you were in that predicament, I'd be there... every moment of every day..."

Taisuke looked at Ruri, leaning down to kiss her chastely, "I know..." he whispered softly.

-+-

"Does Arinori know?" Keizo inquired.

Taisuke shook his head. "He has no idea whatsoever... I cannot imagine what he will do if he finds out..."

"You should not keep this from him, will you?" The Emperor croaked hoarsely, reaching over for a glass of water.

"I don't know... I must tell him an yet I fear what will happen to her if I do..."

Keizo smiled as if reminiscing, "You truly love her, don't you?"

Taisuke's head shot up, his mask, for once, down, the shock clearly plastered on his face, "I..."

Keizo held up a withered hand, still adorned with the dragon ring of the Emperor, only it hung from his skeletal fingers. "There is no need to explain... I understand what you feel..." Keizo smiled, "I once felt the same..."

"..Eiko..." Taisuke whispered but the old man shook his head.

"There was another... a long time ago... a very long long time ago... I loved another more than this world itself..."

Taisuke's brow furrowed.

Keizo smiled, "She was more beautiful to me than anything that could ever exist, far more beautiful than any other woman I'd seen, not only in looks but in heart... and soul... I loved her more than anyone could ever imagine..."

"Who did you love more than Eiko?"

Keizo smiled ruefully, "I loved her more than my own life, more than the well-being of anyone else and yet I broke her heart because of my own father's will... That is something I have regretted my whole life..."

Taisuke looked confusedly at Keizo who smiled and reached out a hand to touch his cheek.

"Every time I look at you, I see her... and each moment I look at the cold, crestfallen look on your face, I remember the last time I saw her..."

Taisuke looked blankly at Keizo, the realization slowly sinking in. "My mother..." he whispered, clutching his forehead.

Keizo nodded, "I remember the last time she came here, still as beautiful as ever and with a little boy at her side. A little boy that looked just like me... I was already married to Eiko at the time and we had already had Ari-kun. But still, I was always in love with her and Eiko knew it...

"And so, on my father's orders, I did not claim you as my son and I did not run away with the woman who completed me. I can still remember how those deep eyes looked at me so hurtfully and so disappointed and still I did not do anything... And so, instead, she bade me to take you in and care for you... to treat you as my own son..." Keizo paused and took a deep breath, "But I did not do that, did I, Taisuke? I've disappointed everyone, haven't I?" Keizo sighed and turned to face the large window covered by a blood red curtain, "They wont even let me see daylight for the last time... and the son who I betrayed the woman I loved for, does not even wish to see me..."

"Did you not love Eiko?" Taisuke asked quietly.

Keizo smiled, "Oh I did, with all my heart... she was my strength when I lost all will to go on... she was always there to support me... but it was nothing like the whirlwind love I felt for your mother... nothing like that at all...

"What I felt for your mother was a love where I cared for nothing else but her happiness, her safety. The love I felt for her was more than the love for myself. I was afraid to hurt her, rather than to get myself hurt. The love I felt for Eiko was the love that slowly grows through hardship and the need for company...

"The love you feel for Ruri is more than the love that you have for yourself... I can see that... I saw it... that night at summer festival... the way you looked at her and the way you two danced as if there was no one else in the room save yourselves... That kind of love comes only once in a lifetime..."

"If you had that kind of feeling with my mother, why do you not redeem yourself now and acknowledge me... You've told me yourself in this room that you are my father. It is clear in the way we look, why must you continue to deny it?"

"Please Taisuke. Let us not talk about this now..."

"I don't understand you..."

"I have my reasons..."

"The tell me why? Why cannot you acknowledge me?"

"Are you after the crown too?" Keizo asked quietly, "I can think of no other reason of why you would want to be recognized so badly..."

Taisuke stood, already set into a rage. "Do you think that is all I'm after?! A stupid little piece of gold to sit on my head?! I'm sorry, Father, But I am not like your other sons. I never had any wish to take part with your own brother and son for a petty fight to rule a dying, withered, old Kingdom."

"Taisuke, calm down."

"No!! I am sick and tired of all the denial, all of the lies, all of the manipulation that goes around here... Do you want to know what I really want??" Taisuke heaved, fists clenching by his side, "All I ever wanted was to be loved and cared for by a family that knows I exist... All I ever wanted was for everyone in this Godforsaken place to know that I belong somewhere... I didn't want to be in limbo..." Taisuke shook his head and the cold mask immediately stepped back into place, "But you never understood, did you? You never understood what it felt like to be called a bastard behind your back, you never understood what it was like to be looked down on, to be beaten up and to be spat on as if you were no more than dirt or a rock in someone's shoe... You never understood... And it was because of that, that you disappointed me..."

"Tai-." Keizo began but Taisuke held up a hand stopping him.

"I'm leaving for tonight... I'll see you tomorrow when I have calmed down..."

Taisuke picked up his cloak and buckled the high collared garment.

"Goodnight, Father." he said walking over to the door and unlocking it.

Keizo sat in his bed calmly after Taisuke had left, finishing off his document and thinking about the words that Taisuke had just said. He smiled sadly, "Good bye, my son." he whispered, before blowing out the candle by his bedside.

-+-

Ruri lay in bed quietly listening as the rain pounded heavily on the windows and the wind howled a lonely and empty song.

Neither Taisuke, Arinori or Ryozo had come in to see her today. It was odd. She'd usually get a wakeup call by Taisuke then move on to see Arinori and somewhere in her day she'd meet up with Ryozo. but today, even when she searched everywhere she could not find them.

Suddenly there was a loud knock on the door and Ruri jumped under the quilts.

She heard voices from the other room, most likely the page telling someone to go away and was shocked when Taisuke burst into her room, rain dripping from his hair and cloak. Ruri got up from her bed and walked towards him.

"Taisuke... what are you-."

Taisuke silenced her as he shut the door behind him and swept her into an embrace.

She felt the cold rain from cloak seep through her nightgown and onto her skin and she desperately wanted to push him away but stopped when she felt two warm droplets of water hit her neck.

"He's gone..." he whispered into her hair, "He's really gone..."

Slowly Ruri embraced his cold, wet body, hoping against hope that she could make the pain go away.

-+-

Taisuke sat in front of the fire, dressed in dry clothes, his wet hair falling across his face and eyes, not bothering to brush it away.

Ruri gently touched his shoulder and handed him a warm drink he accepted gratefully.

She sat down on the hearthrug beside him, watching the fire, trying to give him his privacy and allow him to grieve in his own way.

"He knew he wouldn't have made it to the next day... He knew he wouldn't see daylight again..." Taisuke stated quietly.

Ruri waited silently for him to go on.

"He wrote a letter... after I left him the other night..." Taisuke pulled out a parchment now not folded so neatly and handed it to Ruri, "I can now see how childish I was..."

Ruri unfolded the miraculously dry parchment and read it slowly:

My Dear Subjects,
I have but one last matter to attend to before my time on this plain is up. This subject is one of great importance, it concerns the parenting of the Lord Sorcerer Taisuke Katsura. For as long as I can remember, I have allegedly been Taisuke's father.
May this matter be resolves and may everyone be totally clear on what I am about to tell you. Taisuke Katsura is my son. He is of my flesh, my bone and my blood. And never in my whole life have I been more proud of what he has become and what he has achieved. I am sorry that I have not spoken of this sooner, but there was a promise that I had sworn could not be broken until my death. I am sorry Taisuke for my stupidity. I hope you will understand.
His Royal Highness,
Emperor Keizo Hino.

Ruri quietly folded the parchment and handed it back to Taisuke. "Aren't you going to get it read to the court?"

Taisuke brushed away what must have been a tear and smiled at her, "There is no need... I should have realized that all that was really important was to be acknowledged by my own father, not by everyone else who didn't care for me... I have no need for false love. I am sorry that I did not tell him that I only needed his love... I am the one who has disappointed him..." he whispered.

Ruri turned to face him, drawing him into her embrace. "There is no need to feel that you have disappointed him. You must not feel guilt Taisuke, he was so proud of you... so very proud..."

Taisuke returned her embrace, his tears once again warming her shoulder.

"Your father loved you, Taisuke. He loved you with all of his heart... " Ruri said gently, "... just as I do..." she added in a whisper.

Outside, in the cold dark night, the wind sang a slow mournful song and the sky cried in sadness.

-+-

Whoosh.... there we go...

Finally after almost two moths we're done... I'm so terribly terribly sorry this took so long...

I've been busy with assessment tasks and exams and such... sorry, I was really busy...

But don't worry, I punished myself by stopping myself from reading any of my favourite stories until I had finished this....

See.... there's no need for the chainsaw or the big... heavy... scary-looking pole...

Please... forgive me...

Okay... that's enough from me... I'll just run away now before any of you see me...

Read and review... although I'd understand if you didn't... you know... giving me the silent treatment... I get that a lot...

Alright... I've got to go...

-Akihime.