Madison Street

By Carter Tachikawa

(I wrote this a while ago but am posting it now. What's funny is that this poem didn't even start out to be about death. Somehow, it ended up as a poem about death. Writing can be weird that way, huh?)

Coat hanging on the arm of our couch
Your last cigarette still sits in the tray
Bits of ash ground into the bottom of it
You left the windows opened to let air in
And to let all your uncertainties
And your unhappiness
And your dilemmas
Fly out of it

Dishes, only half clean, rot in the sink
Clothes, still wet, rest inside the tomb
Which we used to call a washer
The floors are decorated with hair
*Your* hair, curled and black as emptiness
(You always complained about losing your hair)
And you left the air conditioner on full blast
I suppose it's on so you could cool
Your red-hot, frayed nerves?
Cause the open windows weren't helping, right?

Those pictures, the so-called memories
The frozen moments of you and me
Have been ripped off the walls, nails included
The house keys thrown onto our counter
The car keys are missing from the drawer
And on the fridge is the lemon-colored note
Words scratched across it like claw marks
Only one sentence makes sense to me:
'I've found a new house on Madison Street.
I don't want to see you.'

And the note slips from my hand
Fall noiselessly like a teardrop
(Know what's funny?
A strand of *your* hair was stuck to it)
The words "Madison Street"
Still burning a hole in the back of my mind

All at once, I want to run out
I want to drive to the street
Knock on the doors
And see if you're behind any of them
Like a contestant picking his prize
And the moment I find you
I'm going to bring you home
One way or another
After all...I still need you

But I won't go after you.
I'm afraid to go after you
Even though I need you back.
I refuse to go to Madison Street
And retrieve you
Why?

Because Madison Street is a place
Where souls are happy
The grass never dies
The sun never sets
And worries cease to exist
Once one walks down that street
I know you went there
To forget woes
I know you went there
In hopes that I would follow

But I *can't*

I can't go down to Madison Street
And bring you home
Or live with you
Because I'm not ready
For your sake and mine,
I'm not ready

* * *

Inspiration For This Poem

+ "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad"- Meatloaf

+ "Love Hurts"- Nazareth

+ "Life Is Too Short"- Scorpions

+ "When Love Kills Love"- Scorpions

+ "Send Me a Angel"-Scorpions

+ Me being depressed

+ Me pondering about death, life, and all that good stuff

Copyright 2003: Carter Tachikawa

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