I close my eyes
I look inside
the people around completely oblivious
never knowing
never seeing
never guessing
they think they know me
they think they care
guessing at my empty thoughts
they'll never know
the pounding fear
the growing rage
the saddening tears
never guessing the building pain
they never see the empty darkness in my head
or hear the deafening screams
they will never feel the pain of emptiness
or the terrifying feeling that it will always be this way
I try to let them in
but their fear pushes them away
they don't want to think I could ever be this way
I want to push through to the light
but my anger is holding on