Repent

So Perhaps the truth is

            That my heart is still in love with you

            Therefore cursed, for why must my heart be broken

            Like small pieces of shattered glass

                     Broken upon the surface of reality

Closing my eyes, I’ll I see are the flaws

Is there at least one good thing about me?

            Clumsy spelling, clumsy tripping over my own words

            Always afraid, with nerves on overload

            Shall this be my death? –dieing of a panic attack?

Do I want you to take me?

         No—you live too much in the reality

         It’s just the hurt that will not leave

                           How pathetic can I be!

I yell to my mirror

       Do you understand nothing?!

       Please-please shut up!

       Make it just stop, make it all stop

Mirror, Mirror on my wall

     Let me see myself as someone else

     Thin, beautiful, smart indeed’

     Yes they would say ‘she indeed as a future a head of her, she will do great things’

     Powerless mirror you only show me. I hate thee indeed’

Do I not have faith?

      In which I once claimed

      That one only suffers to be enlightened?

Please past love—look me in the eyes

      And tell me you don’t see the nothing of a girl

      Tell me that you see someone of great beauty

Look me in the eye please!

       And tell me your reality

       You cannot can you?

       Without shattering all my dreams

       Naïve with my hopes and dreams

Shame me,

       A stupid self pitting girl

       Let me own death repent myself

       Death punished by my own hand

       Shall this repent me? Repent me!

Shame me,

      For having heart made from glass

      Shame me