John Hamilton, an interesting fellow if there ever was one. The thing with John is he's interesting on the inside. For you see, he's quite insane. But in a quiet way. Not in a loud noticeable way that stands right out.

He doesn't wander down the street mumbling to himself, causing people to shrink back in fear from him.

He doesn't dance about in from of cars and buses disrupting things.

He hasn't tried to kill himself in one of the myriad way s that are available to him. No wrist slashing, building jumping here by golly!

No, he's insane in a quiet way, so that no one expects that there's something goin on in his head that's not quite right. In fact, if you looked at him closely you'd say he was downright normal, the kind of fellow you'd trust your house with over the weekend with, so that your plants could be watered and your pets fed. He's the kind of guy you'd think would be safe to date your daughter, and know that she'd be home by ten and that everything would be just fine. Right as rain, as John himself may say.

Sadly though John is none of these things. John wouldn't water your plants most likely, he'd probably let them dry up and die. You'd be lucky if your cat Frisky survived the first day.

John may look normal, but things aren't quite right with him.

For instance.

Animals have a way of disappearing in his neighborhood. Not a lot, just a few. Little Timothy's golden retriever pup one week, the next week the Smith's calico cat. They'd search and search for their animals , but not a trace of them would be found. John would know where their cats and dogs went though. John wouldn't tell them though, because that would be dangerous for John, and he knows what's best for him. He knows it's best to look normal, to look RIGHT if you will. Right as rain, fine and dandy.

Other things would disappear sometimes, not just cats and dogs. A few neighborhoods over small 8 year old Jane vanished without a trace, just like little Timmy's golden retriever pup. People searched for weeks, sweeping the neighborhood, asking everyone where little Jane had gone, have you seen Jane.

But no one had.

Except John.

But no one thought of John. John was normal, John was nice, John wouldn't hurt a fly cause John was right by golly.

A smile on his face, always happy always helpful. Yessir, if you just looked close and glance away you'd think John was right as rain and as nice as nice could be.

But if you looked a little closer, something, that reptile part of your brain that everyone has, that part of your brain that knows when some is NOT right as rain, would tell you not to get so close, that maybe it wouldn't be wise. That it might in fact be dangerous to get so close to John. Oh yes, John wasn't normal, he may look normal, act normal, smile and wink and nod and blink normal. But John was very different from you or me. John knew what happened to all those cats and dogs and Jane and that prostitute in the next town over.

And maybe, just maybe, if you'll ask real nice he'll tell you.

And then show you.

But you won't ask him. Because a part of you knows. And so you'll wave at John, say hi to him, wave to him, maybe even shake his hand. But you'll get no closer.

And that's what John wants, he likes it when people don't get too close. And he likes looking normal, right as rain as he would say.

Only a few people know he's not normal, and those people aren't around anymore.

And so John went to work every day, waved at the people he worked with and they'd wave back but never get any closer, and so it went.

Then one day things became not normal. One day a police car showed up and everything was not as right as rain for John, and John was no longer happy, and he no longer smiled. The Police had found out what happened to Jane, and the prostitutes, and that woman up north, and all those pets. Why John had taken them to his special place and he did not normal things with them.

And the police did not like it when people did these kind of things and so they took John away. All the time he kept smiling, he even tried to wave to his gathering neighbors but the police wouldn't let him. And so they took John away.

And the judge and jury found him guilty of doing things that weren't normal, that weren't right. And so John was sent away to prison.

And now John is in prison, where the other prisoners stay away from him. Because their reptiles in THEIR brains tell them to stay away from John.

That John isn't normal, and John is NOT right as rain.

And John smiles.