The Papa Johns Song, a Humor fanfic

The Papa Johns Song!

A/N: If some of my more frequent reviewers haven't noticed yet... when I get bored, I get creative. Sometimes, the creativity goes into song parodies (especially when I'm listening to music), as did this one. Of course, anything becomes a song parody when you substitute random words with the word "pizza"... (fun game, actually, and will keep you entertained for hours! Try it with music like The Goo Goo Dolls or Relient K.)

ET, Kitt, and I were sitting around one night helping Kitt make posters for an oral presentation she had the next day, and after we "got high" off of the markers (purely joking, even though we were a bit overly giddy at the time), we started the "pizza substitution game" with a song from the Disney movie "Mulan". Of course, since ET works at Papa Johns, it was twice as funny as it should have been (we chalk it up to the markers now).

This is the result of our insanity...

Let's get down to business to defeat the buns
Did they send me daughters when I asked for sons?
You're the saddest cooks I've ever met
But you can bet before we're through
Mister, I'll make a chef out of you...

Tranquil is your oven, but a fire within
Once you find your sausage you are sure to win
You're a spineless fish; an anchovy
And you haven't got mushrooms
Somehow I'll make a chef out of you!

"I'm never gonna catch my dough!"
Say goodbye to him that threw it
"Why was I a fool in school for cutting Home Ec.?"
"This guy's got 'em worked to death!"
"Hope he doesn't cut right through me..."
"Now I really wish that I knew how to cook!"

(Be a chef)
You must be swift as the coursing pizza sauce
(Be a chef)
With all the force of a great Tycoon
(Be a chef)
With all the strength of a raging oven fire
Mysterious as the dark side of the crust...!

Time is racing toward us 'til customers arrive
Heed their every order and you might survive
You're unsuited for the rage of the kitchen
So pack up, go home, you're through;
How could I make a chef out of you?

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