Once upon a time there was a princess. Now unlike other princesses who were told they were

beautiful when they were really ugly, this one really was beautiful. She had lovely thick red hair

that flowed to her waist. Lovely green eyes. Her hips were wide and made for giving birth to

babies and her bust just as wide, made for nursing babies. This helped make her waist look thinner

then it really was, her waist was actually on the thicker side which meant she'd have healthy

babies as they would have room to grow. She had been lucky enough to miss out on the worse

skin scarring diseases like small pox, chicken pox, and acne. She was short too, always a plus with

the men as they preferred women they could feel protective towards. She waxed her eyebrows so

they weren't too thick or joined in the middle. She also waxed her armpits and legs because she

found she smelled better without body hair to collect sweat. Unlike everyone else she bathed

every day and was thought to be a weirdo but she liked the fact she didn't stink like all the others

in her court.

Now being a princess she wasn't thought highly of. After all, she was only a female. All she was

good for was marrying off to some prince. However the king only had her as a riding accident

made him incapable of having another child or even being with a woman. So he had to be satisfied

with a son-in-law rather then a son.

When the world was new God didn't mind it when cousins or even uncles and nieces married each

other. There wasn't a lot of people in the world, after all. But when there got to be more people

all the inter-marrying made God mad and He put a curse on blood so if a person married their

cousin or someone else related to them by blood their family have all sorts of problems. They

could be mentally or physically weak, bleed without stopping when cut, crave blood and abhor

sunlight like the vampire, or be really ugly - or any combination thereof. This didn't stop people

from doing this however. Some even had started a tradition of paternal cousins - meaning their

fathers were brothers - being forced into an arranged marriage with each other. This inbreeding

was especially a big problem amongst the nobility and royalty. Uncles married their nieces.

Cousins married each other. And thanks to adultery, some unwittingly married their own siblings

or their own children.

The princess though had been thankfully born to a mother who's great-great grandparents had

been peasants who earned a title of Lord and Lady by saving the life of a former king. They made

it a habit to make sure their kids and grandkids only married others who had been raised to the

rank of nobility from lower classes through acts of bravery. This prevented inbreeding and

therefore their line didn't suffer from the usual weaknesses.

Then the princess' mother broke family tradition and married the king. It really was just sheer luck

that the king's first and only legitimate offspring was completely normal. In fact a little more then

normal for she was very smart. Her teeth perfectly straight and healthy. Her skin ruddy even

though she avoided the sun as any good princess should. Yes, she was the perfect princess.

But still - she was just a princess.

Now the princess had a betrothed from birth. A weak minded, sickly prince. Though he was

nearly five years her senior, the prince acted like a three year old. The princess was not happy

about having to marry him. Thankfully a bad cold took the prince's life just days before the

wedding. The princess mourned in public but in private she was relieved and happy. Maybe now

she could marry someone with half a brain.

Two years past. The princess was now 17 and rapidly approaching spinsterhood. Her father

hadn't bothered finding her a new husband because he was too busy fighting a war with another

king. This king was a cruel man who liked to see things die. So it was no surprise when he

strangled his own wife for fun. Being a king he could do this without punishment. However he

still needed an heir and his eye landed upon the pretty little princess of his enemy. Arrangements

were made and the cruel old man declared peace in exchange for the princess as his wife - or

rather his slave.

The day of the wedding came much to the princess' horror. Soon she was taking the longest walk

of her life. The priest began to speak and the princess listened with a heavy heart. Then he asked

the all important question.

"Do you take this man...."

He never even got to finish. The princess quickly replied. "No."

There was an uproar. Both kings demanded the princess change her reply. Both threatened her

with severe beatings. The priest told her to do as she was suppose to do as God demanded it. The

princess remained stubborn however.

"I'd rather marry Death himself then this murderous bastard."

A cold wind filled the church and the candles dimmed. When they returned to full light a man in a

fine black cloak, the hood pulled up to hide his face, walked down the aisle. His hand, strong and

firmly fleshed, clutched a long scythe. People pulled away, feeling the coldness around him. The

coldness of death.

"I am here to claim my bride." Death said, his voice resounding beautifully in the church.

"Now wait just one bloody minute here! This is MY bride!" The murderous king raged.

Sighing, Death touched the king on the face and a second later the king keeled over dead. Sent to

Hell where he belonged.

In a shaky voice the priest married the princess to Death. Much to everyone's surprise she didn't

fall over dead as he kissed her and took her hand. They walked down the aisle but halfway down

it they both vanished from sight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Marriage to Death really wasn't that bad, the princess decided. He treated her like an equal, for

nothing equalizes like death. They had intelligent conversations and he never spoke down to her.

They fought but always made up before she went to bed. Death never slept. Yet always managed

to spend time with her. She didn't like it when he had to take children or parents and this is what

they often fought about, but it was his job. He didn't have a choice, whomever was destined to

die would die. He had no say.

It didn't hurt that Death was good looking either. Strong features, a square jaw, perfect thick

black hair, brown eyes, a ready smile, a "Roman" nose. He was tall and broad. Deeply tanned as

he was from somewhere around the Mediterranean. It had been several hundred years since being

chosen to replace the former Death and he honestly couldn't remember much about his life before.

He had been a young boy when the Death at the time told him he had been chosen the heir.

The princess couldn't make sense of it all but apparently he was the first Death ever to marry and

all the others had picked out young boys to replace them when they got tired of the job.

Of course with Death not requiring sleep there was a lot of baby making activity going on. And of

course this eventually led to pregnancy. Death and the princess were so happy they even wrote

her parents about it. The letter that came back was horrible however. The king was mad at his

daughter for disobeying him and called her unborn child an abomination.

Eventually the princess gave birth though with angels as midwives. A healthy baby boy with his

father's hair and his mother's eyes was born. The princess couldn't have been happier. Death,

however, didn't seem so happy. He'd look at his son sadly. Hold him like if he expected the

robust boy to fall apart at the slightest touch. Three years past this way until the princess found

out why her husband was so said. By this time they had two more children. Twins. A boy and a

girl. Death wasn't so sad with them. In fact he played with them a lot and was always laughing.

Death sat the princess down one day, looking very upset about something. "Dear heart," he said,

licking his lips. "I'm afraid I have some bad news.... Our son, our first born.... tomorrow -

tomorrow he is to die."

The princess' world went white. Blinding white. The shock of hearing her son, a child of Death

himself, was slated to die, had caused the princess to lose her sight. "No! No no no!" She

shouted, trying to stand, knocking things over in her quest to get at her husband. Shake him,

demand he change this. "He's a good boy! A healthy boy! How can you do this?"

"I have no choice!" Death shouted, grabbing her and shaking her before sitting her back down,

crying at the sight of her visionless eyes. "It's been written and must be done. If I don't do it - we

cannot be together ever again."

This was one fight that didn't get solved by bedtime.

At a few minutes to midnight while Death was out making his rounds, the princess got out of bed

and took her oldest child to a nearby fairy, telling her the entire story. The fairy gave the princess

a sickly changling child that looked just like the princess' son.

"T'is a mercy for the poor lad," the fairy said while nodding to the changling. "Nothing can cure

him but fairy law forbids us killing our own even to end their pain."

The princess took the changling back to her home and slipped him into bed. Then laid down in her

own bed, feigning sleep.

Soon Death came into his son's room, holding back the tears as he reached out. Touching the

child's fevered brow, watching him pass on. Then Death started and roared out for his wife.

Bursting into their bedroom a few seconds later. "How DARE you?" He shouted, the room filling

with the smell and fog of death.

"I did it to save our son!" She shouted back. "Something you refused to do!"

"I do what God decrees!" Death began to fade from sight. "Now I must leave you forever since

you didn't trust me with our own son."

The princess stared in horror. "You can't go....."

"You betrayed me. Betrayed us. I must leave." He was almost gone.

"But I love you! Don't leave us. Don't leave our children." Tears streaked her face.

Death shook his head, the only thing left of him now. "There is hope, my love. Seek me beyond

the gates of fire. If you really do love me you can win me back." And with that he was gone.

The next morning the princess handed the twins over to the fairy, kissed all three of her children

goodbye, donned men's clothing, and started walking. She didn't know where the gates of fire

were so she walked until she found a place where several roads crossed each other. Taking out a

knife from her dinner table, she placed it on the palm of her hand and spun it. Then she head off in

the direction it pointed. When she came to a fork in the road she would turn her back to it, fling

the knife behind her, and whichever path it landed on she took. Sometimes it wouldn't land on a

path at all and she had to walk through tangled underbrush, through dangerous swamps, across

wastelands.

Her shoes wore out. Her tender, pampered princess feet with their dainty toes her husband loved

to kiss and soft soles he loved to tickle, began to dry out and crack. Yet she kept walking. After a

farmer tried to get fresh with her thinking her a woman of ill repute she avoided taking rides

unless they were from women. Occasionally a woman got fresh too, but they understood what

"No" meant.

Wherever she went the princess asked if they knew where the gates of fire were. No one did. The

princess walked for a year and a day before collapsing at the feet of a little old man. The little old

man had a big young wife who carried the princess into their cabin and nursed her back to health.

When she was well she told her story. From the very beginning to fainting at the little old man's

feet.

"I know where the gates of fire are." The little old man said. "But it's not information I can give

for free. You're still a princess and not humble enough to pass through the gates. If you work for

me for a year and a day I will tell you how to get there."

So the princess worked for the little old man and his big young wife. She did the most demeaning,

unprincessly jobs. Mucking the stables, scraping the little old man's corns, plucking out his back

hair. The big young wife would secretly lend a hand once in awhile as if she felt guilty about

something. Meanwhile the princess tended the sheep and even saw to the cow's constipation.

Finally a year and a day past. The princess went to the little old man to find out where the gates of

fire were. The little old man laughed at her. "Little idiot. I don't know where the gates of fire are.

I just wanted free slave labor from a pretty little thing."

The princess was so shocked she struck the little old man and he fell down dead. For a brief

moment she saw her husband but before she could touch him he vanished from her sight.

Now a murderer the princess began to sob. Suddenly she felt the big young wife's hand on her

shoulder. The big young wife now the big young widow took the princess and cleaned up her

face, tended to her feet until they were baby soft again, and put her in new, clean clothing.

"Thank you for freeing me." The big young widow said. "He was a horrible old fairy man who

had to be struck by a princess to die. Now I'm free of him and can return to my one true love."

"I'm happy for you but hope is fading fast for me." The princess whined.

The big young widow shook her head. "No. I know where the gates of fire are. That's where my

one true love lives. Come on, get a good night's sleep and I'll bury him. Tomorrow we'll set out."

So the next day the princess and the big young widow set out. The big young widow carried with

her a big book of healing and lots of fairy gold. She gave the princess several books of fairy

knowledge and food to carry. They walked and walked. Sometimes they got rides and with the

big young widow they had no problems with men who couldn't take no for an answer.

Finally after three more months of walking the princess and the big young widow came to a little

town and just beyond it was the gates of fire. Towering above the town like a giant square sun.

As they entered the town a middle aged man who was bigger then the big young widow ran out.

This was her one true love. He greeted the princess heartily. The wedding of the big young widow

and the bigger middle aged man was celebrated right away and as the princess could only

approach the gates of fire by moonlight she stayed for the wedding.

Just before the loving couple went on their honeymoon the former big young widow now the big

young new bride took the princess aside. Handing her a jar of fairy ointment.

"If your heart is true you can spread this on yourself and pass through the gates unharmed. But if

not it will be as hard as rock." Then the big young new wife went off on her honeymoon.

The princess approached the gates of fire with trepidation. Up close they were fearsome.

Towering bars of fire that shot straight out of the ground. The heat was unbearable. The princess'

hair started to become singed just from being near it. She opened the jar and tried to spread it.

"No!" Her fingers met just hard, smooth surface. Falling to her knees she began to cry. Her tears

falling into the jar. Moonlight hitting the tears. The princess started to swirl the tears around the

jar with her finger - and it was then she noticed that the ointment was melting!

Her fingers dipped in and she spread the ointment all over herself. Then she charged the gates,

passing through them without one tiny burn.

On the other side was her husband, smiling and holding his arms open, standing in a beautiful

meadow. However the princess stopped.

"You're not my husband."

The faux-Death burst into a thousand pieces. The princess found herself surrounded by thousands

of Deaths. Their voices echoing over the suddenly stony and barren land. "Only by finding your

real husband can you win him back."

The princess looked around. Her heart shattering. All of them looked exactly alike. How would

she ever choose?

"Choose - you must choose...." They chanted. All of them.

No - not all of them. One did not speak. He just stood there, staring at her sadly. The princess ran

and flung her arms around him. "You! You're my husband."

The other Deaths vanished. Only the princess and her husband remained. Gently he kissed her and

stroked her hair. "You still betrayed me by switching our son with a changling even if he was a

changling scheduled to die as well."

The princess felt the tears come again. Sometimes she hated herself for crying so much, but that's

what princesses do, they cry. "He's our son. I couldn't let him die."

"And that's good." A voice boomed, shaking both the princess and Death to their knees. The

voice of God. The voice was neither male nor female but a strange harmony of both. "Your son

wasn't suppose to die. The princess' father sold his soul to Satan to put your son's name on the

list. Knowing only about the one grandchild he thought if the boy died then his daughter would

leave you, Death, and marry a prince or king of his choice. This transgression will be dealt with.

Now would you both please go home?"

With that the princess and Death found themselves in their little home. All three of their children,

all two years older, came tumbling in. The old fairy woman smiling at the scene. A family -

reunited. No sight could be more like Heaven.

~~The End~~