Epilogue

And that is the tale. It has taken me so long to write it, even though I could have just pulled the thoughts from my head and dumped them on the paper if I wanted. But somehow I desired to write them down, in the slow manner that humans write them, with quill and ink.

Why do I desire this?

It is of a piece with the way that I have felt since Ydana left me. I find myself wanting to spend time in a human body just for the feel of it, to eat food and laugh and dance just to experience the sensations. Of course I can still leave at any time and flow back into the shadows, and I do that quite often, as befits the great power and guardian of Ilantra. But otherwise—

She did something to me. I'm certain she did. She must have. For a human, she was remarkable.

And that last sentence doesn't look right. No, for anyone she was remarkable.

That's another thing. I once would have considered keeping good relations with the Dark worth the sacrifice of a human, or a few humans. I can still think that way, but almost as if the thoughts were beyond glass. I don't feel the emotional force of them any more. I have unruly emotions that cause me to have the strangest impulse to stick my tongue out at Dark instead.

This is so very strange.

It's probably worse because I've spent so much time walking through the memories of what Ydana was doing those last few months, and especially what she was thinking, in order to recount her story. I'm immersed in the human way of thinking. The more time I spend there, the worse I become.

Worse yet, part of me does not mind.

That's not normal, is it?

Nor is it normal to feel so much interest and pride in the affairs of the Ilantrans. Their Queen, Isilla, was safely delivered of a daughter last year, while I was writing, and a powerful Scarlet mage. I watch her, and the fire that dances around her, and feel the worry of the Cycle as it watches her, too. I suspect it will be some time before the Cycle grants such strong magic so freely again.

Look at what Ydana did with it, after all.

Even more important to me, Helidis has given birth to the first half-human child any ilzán ever bore willingly. There are others wedding among the fey, too. I cannot imagine how strongly the Ilantrans will be tied to their Kingdom by the time this is done, but sometimes I catch a glimpse of it and shiver in awe.

Me, shivering in awe.

Can you see why I'm worried about myself?

As for Ydana… they mourn her, that is true, but they move on with their lives well enough. They planted a silver tree for her, in the ilzán way of mourning the dead, and it stands at the edge of the River Isiluin and shines in the sunlight and moonlight. At times I catch Destiny looking at it, and thinking about how its prophecies are sometimes fulfilled and sometimes not. I think Destiny is going to have to rethink the way it gives prophecies and binds mortals to its orders. They seem to do very much what they want.

It is harder for me, who knew her so well, and who lifts his head every time a breeze passes, to wonder if she is riding it. Of course, with the knowledge that I have as a great power, I know that is unlikely. She was human in mind still when she left, and she loved the wind all her life. She would blend completely with it as soon as she could.

On the other hand, part of me is prone to insist she is watching.

That is the human part of me, and I think I will not squash it for the moment, but watch the tree shining in the sun, and remember.

-Shadow.

A/N: This is the end of Queen At Any Moment, and I think a fitting one. It should end on a note of joy, since I had so much joy in writing it.

Thank you to those who read, and especially those who reviewed: BbHtrYoink, A. Lee, White Lyhter, Rina Riku, Jonathan Lee, ShadowRebel, dazed*kitten, Miut, whocares4, Anarchist Smurfette, maira, and Aristeo. I hope you had at least half as much fun as I did.

The next Faean story should begin on Saturday, and will be a long Arvennese novel called Terimar Right or Wrong.

See you then!

-Limyaael.