Summary: A story about a girl who finds out she’s pregnant after being drunk one night with her boyfriend and all the changes it brings to her life… a story about searching for love in all the wrong places, and when you find one in the right, how unobtainable it seems.

Notes: Hey all! This is my longest chapter yet! Thanks for the encouragement differntlyhappy ^_^

Kears~ Adi isn’t falling for Joel; they’re just that close. Though this chapter will make it seem even more like they love each other. But it’s in a brotherly sisterly way… fer now at least *smirk*. Read on!

Chapter 4

Joel seemed to almost snarl as he spoke, “I’m gonna *kill* that son of a-“

“*Joel*! He’s in jail ok?”

“For what it did to you?”

“No, he didn’t *do* anything to me. He got busted for pot.”

He looked at her now, in almost disbelief at her first statement, barely even hearing the real reason that creep was in jail. How could she not see what he had done? She was drunk… she couldn’t give consent… that bastard had raped her. But she didn’t realize it, not yet… and it wasn’t his place to tell her. She needed to figure it out for herself.

“When did this happen?” His voice was still harsh with rage, but his eyes softened at the sight of her, how could she be dealing with all of this?

She blink several times, trying to fight the tears that weld in her eyes, it was so hard to recall that night. “About two weeks ago…”

Her breath began to be shuddered again as her heart raced, she knew what would come next, Joel would realize what day that was, and blame the whole thing on himself. But he had to know none of this was his fault. She’d screwed up… it was all her fault.

Joel’s rage was quieted by the expression that now over took Adria’s face. She had been trying to hide her fear, trying to hide her pain… but now it was showing through. As he heard her words his eyes widened.

“Chip’s party…”

She drew in a quick breath, sounding like a gasp, though it was to keep her from braking down. She couldn’t find her words, but shook her head…

//No Joel… it’s not your fault…//

“The party I couldn’t come to…”

//It’s not your fault.//

“… The night I went to Kaylin’s dress rehearsal.” He looked down, his fists clenched.

//It’s not your fault!//

“I’m so sorry Adi… If I’d only been there… none of this would have-“

 Anger over took her fear and she suddenly found her voice. “Stop it Joel! *None* of this your fault! I would have drunk with him anyway-!”

“But I could have given you a ride home! Then he wouldn’t have had a chance to take advantage of you!”

“He didn’t take advantage of me…” She spoke softly, tears gently falling down her cheeks.

Joel sighed, mentally kicking himself for saying anything, why couldn’t he keep his mouth shut? Moving closer to her, he wrapped his arms around her.

“I’m sorry Adi…” He spoke to her coaxingly, wishing he could take her pain away.

Sighing she pulled him closer, the tears wouldn’t stop. She pressed her now shaking body against him, trying, as it seemed, to push herself out of existence. This day had been hard enough, and she hadn’t even told him what her parents had said…

After what seemed like ages to Joel, and only moments to Adria, she spoke. Beginning in a tentative whisper, as she talked into his shoulder. “There’s more…”

Gently taking her chin in his hand, he raised her eyes to meet his. With out speaking a word, he conveyed the question on his mind… Adi nodded in response.

“I told them… I have two weeks to find a place to stay.” Her eyes showed the fear she had so hardly hidden in her voice. Joel held her softly, just as she had that fateful night before…

Lifting his eyes from her he looked around the place where they sat. The house seemed so empty somehow. The living room was bare, all the photos that once decorated the mantel of the near by fireplace were gone, the memories each held too hard to bear. His eyes followed through the open doorway to the hall, and the stairs. Fourth bedrooms were up there, only two used. One he would never open again.

“You’re staying here.” He spoke firmly, taking her and leaning her limp-like body against the couch and rising to his feet. Adi looked up at him, she was too emotionally worn out to argue with him… and the thought seemed comforting somehow.

Just then the door swung open and a scrawny blond girl stalked in. Dropping her bags on the floor she hollered out, “Joel! I’m home!” Moving across the hard wood floored hall, and into sight of the living room. A smile crossed her face as she spotted the two of them.

“Oh hey Adi.” She waved as Adria peered over the back of the couch. She gave a weak smile, trying to hide her eyes red from tears before.

“Kay, Adi’s gonna stay here for a while. You wanna help move her in?” Joel turned and looked over at his little sister. Kay smiled wider, no look of surprise on her face.

“That’s great! Of course I’ll help. Want me to go clean up the guest bedroom while you go grab some of her stuff?” Her eyes met Joel’s; she knew they would talk about the reason Adi was staying later.

“That’d be great Kay.” He smiled and turned to Adi, offering her his hand up.

“Ready to go?”  Adi smiled, taking his hand; maybe things wouldn’t be so horrible after all.