AN - An English assignment gone crazy. we had to write on one of three prompts, two of which were A Day in the Life of a Cheap Psychic and Time Travel. I chose to combine them, in an unrealistic way I might add. Also, if any of you like US President George W Bush and support him, I am truly sorry for what will probably be offensive to you in this story. Other than that, enjoy!

Rating - PG-13 for slight profanity and violence.

A Day in the Life of a Cheap Psychic

"Come see the Great Psychic Zoltar. Fortunes told, palms read. Walk- ins welcome." Bold black letters located on the stucco inner wall next to the door declared this message. Beyond the door was a creaky set of stairs leading to a doorway draped with burgundy faux-velvet curtains. The room concealed by the curtains was small, and the only light came from the numerous candles that were artfully placed around the room. The majority of the candles were on the floor at the center of the room, surrounding a mahogany table. Atop the table lay a crystal ball, and the upper body of an exhausted man. This, of course, was the Great Psychic Zoltar. But he wasn't especially great, nor was he really psychic, and his name certainly was not Zoltar. He was simply Fernando, a fraud and a failure.

At this moment Fernando lifted his head from the table and groaned, only to drive his skull repeatedly back into the table. "Why," bang, "do," bang, "I," bang, "have," bang, "this," bang, "God," bang, "damn," bang, "awful," bang, "job," bang. This he said angrily, the bangs of course being the sound of his head hitting the table. Fernando sighed and looked glumly into his crystal ball. No matter how hard he tried, he could never see anything in its depths. He turned away from it and sighed again. The source of his frustration was the fact that he could not tell the future. All of the men before him in his family, as far back as they could trace, had possessed the gift of the Sight. But Fernando had not inherited their prescient powers, and his parents had deemed him a failure because of this. Good thing they died when I was eighteen, Fernando thought. They would be ashamed if they knew what kind of sham their son was running. But Fernando himself was ashamed of what he had become. He truly wanted to have the Sight, and to be able to help people make the right choices in their lives. After all, life is about choosing between possible futures. but most people weren't able to tell what the consequences of their actions would be. Fernando hoped beyond hope that he would be able to make a difference in people's lives, and that is why he opened his business anyway. But it wasn't working; he didn't seem to be making any difference in the world.

Fernando pushed his thoughts of his dismal failure out of his head and pulled out a miniature television and remote from the trapdoor under his feet. He placed them on top of his table and began randomly flipping through the channels, anything to get his mind off his life. Fernando settled on the news and watched for a few minutes. He wasn't really paying attention until he heard something about time travel, and then he immediately sat up rigidly in his seat and stared at the TV.

"The CyberTech Lab's time machines are up and running," declared a young female newscaster. "They have already undergone intensive testing and been proclaimed safe. If you would like to be one of the first one-hundred human test subjects, please call 999-TIME right now."

Fernando immediately dashed into the back room, grabbed the phone, and dialed the number. He couldn't believe his luck. This was a way to get what he had always dreamed of, being able to know the future so he could help the world. He bounced nervously from one foot to the other as the phone rang. Suddenly he heard someone on the other line pick up.

"Congratulations, you've gained the chance to be one of the first time travelers," said a male voice. "Please give us your name so we can expect you at the lab in the next hour."

Fernando was grinning from ear to ear as he gave the man his name and then hurried out of the building and started up his beat-up old Chevy, driving as fast as he could in city traffic to reach the lab.

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"Please sir, we'll need you to fill out these consent forms."

Fernando didn't even care that the waivers he was signing warned of possible death. He was simply too excited to pay attention to such things. This was the chance of a lifetime to learn the future and he couldn't pass it up. He would come back with knowledge that no one else had, and he would be able to share it. How could he refuse?

"Now just step right over here, and tell us where and when you want to go," the lab technician said. "Once you're there, you can stay as long as you like, just come back to the labs eventually and whoever works there will transport you back to a few minutes from now, ok? Now where and when do you want to go?"

"I want to see the 2004 presidential candidates giving their speeches to the public in New York," said Fernando. This would do nicely, he thought. He would see the results of the election and what the president would do in office. That way, when he returned to the present, he would tell the public who to vote for. It couldn't be better, it was a major issue that would determine the happenings of the next four years, and the repercussions would carry even farther. Fernando was sure that if he did this, he would make a difference.

"Very good, sir. Now just step into the machine as I set the date and time."

Fernando complied, and closed his eyes as a prickling sensation covered his entire body and built up to the point of discomfort.

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Fernando opened his eyes. It only took him a few seconds to register the scene around him. He was standing on a large platform, and he was about ten feet to the side of George W. Bush. The president was talking like an idiot, and a crowd of people before the platform watched and listened in awe as if Bush was the most amazing person in the world. God, I'm glad I'm here, Fernando thought. I'll have to go back and correct the mistake all these people will make by voting for him.

This was the last thought Fernando had, for a split second later, only two seconds after his arrival in the future, a speeding bullet penetrated Fernando's skull and lodged itself in his brain. He dropped dead immediately.

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Shit, shit, shit, thought the sniper who had fired the shot at George Dubayah from the top of a building, only to have it hit some guy who suddenly appeared on the platform. Where the hell did he come from? The sniper hurried to reload his rifle. Luckily, the moronic president hadn't noticed that a man had appeared a mere ten feet away from him, then suddenly dropped dead. The sniper hoped he would have another chance.

But it was not to be. The crowd of people watching Bush's speech began screaming and pointing. Bush turned and noticed the body, and his secret service men came suddenly up beside Bush, running with him away from the scene.

The sniper muttered many more choice profanities as he realized that now he would probably never get another chance to shoot Bush. And it was all because of that weirdo that had just appeared on the platform. The sniper had blown his life's mission. He pulled out the .45 which he had saved for in case that he got caught in his assassination attempt. He put the gun to his temple and drew the trigger, ending his life.

Fernando had failed. His good intentions and his wish were shattered, but he did not know this. His last thoughts had been that he would succeed in his quest. But in reality, he had caused a disaster. Where Fernando had intended to do good, he had altered the course of history so that Bush would gain another term as president and wreak havoc on the world. In the middle of his term, Bush would declare war and every nation with nuclear arms would launch them at each other. In three years, the world would be plummeted into the depths of nuclear winter, or as Bush would call it, nucular winter. Poor Fernando. Because of his dreams he inadvertently caused the end of humankind. At least it was bound to happen in the next century anyway. But now we'll never know.