Chocolate Stalker* By: Rei

Don't walk. Don't walk. Walk, walk WALK! Oh god, RUN! Who's following me? Why would someone be stalking me? Oh god, this is weird, who is that? The footsteps are like a big fat man but it could just be someone in big boots. Or it could be a big fat man in big boots. Oh god. Is he going to crush me? Is there really someone following me or am I just hallucinating? He won't catch me if I keep running. I'm fast, I do track. Yeah I'm the slowest guy on the team, but I can probably outrun some fat guy with clogged arteries and ungainly footwear. Or maybe he's got muscles and that's why he's so loud.
What's he going to do to me if he catches me? Is he going to mug me, beat me, rape me? Did I drop my wallet back somewhere? Maybe he wants to give it wait I left that at home, that's why I'm walking instead of taking the bus, that's why I'm being followed! Oh god, his footsteps are getting closer! I'd better turn this corner, maybe I can lose him. "Hey!" A voice called out, sounding pissed. It's a girl, it's annoyed, it'?
"Huh?" I say stupidly, turning around. It is Miranda, not a stalker after all! She's wearing combat boots with enormous heels. This coupled with Miranda's tendency to stomp explains the heavy footsteps. I try to calm down and not get too angry with her.
She thrusts a package at me. It smells strongly of chocolate, but I pretend not to know what it is as I tear it open. Sure enough, it's an expensive box of Godiva chocolates, one of those four-piecers that'll cost you your allowance. I don't really like Godiva, but I don't say anything. "After ignoring me all this time you really don't deserve this," she says, folding her arms over her black-sweatered chest. "So I'll have to take one."
I hand her the dark chocolate, the one she loves and I abhor. "Mmm." she moans, popping it into her gaping mouth. "I can't be-lieve I'm dating a guy who doesn't like dark chocolate. William, I may just have to leave you for your brother."
She smiles. I smile. I don't have a brother, and anyway, I know she's kidding. "Happy Valentines Day," I say. "I didn't get you anything."
She shrugs. "You got me chocolate. It's not like I ever get this stuff for myself." With that she takes her second piece, and her third. "You can keep the last one."
I laugh. "Okay Miranda."

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*I know the title sucks! Don't eat my arm, please? I shall give you mangoes!