The Way The World Turns
(25 Febrero, 2004)

I'm slipping away again
Losing control of myself
Falling apart from my life
Watch it all collapse
A stranger witnessing
My own self destruction
I don't want to cry
Because I know I've no right
As always, it's my fault
And yet I lose grip
Situation grown out of hand
Speaches on existentialism
I'm the only one who can
Control how I react
To this life, it's a lie
My head is clouded
The world is spinning
I can just run along
Puppet on a haunted string
Swallow my pride and move on
Don't let them see me fall
I see him watching me
Concern in his eyes
But I know he wouldn't know
Could never understand
I'm a hypocrite
I'm a loser
I'm falling behind
I'm losing to my own game
I run away from it all
Push off those who care
Restarting the cycle
Falling into my abyss
Self defiance, hatred
Lectures falling again
Upon my deaf ears
I can't hear any more
Than what they tell me
Drugged by their effect
My own life slipping away
Sanity crumbling to dust
So sick yet strong enough
To push away my last help
I'm nothing I want to be
And yet I can't stop it
Can't help it
They're controlling me
Forcing me into their grip
I've fallen down
Never getting up again
Slip down the gravel path
Been here too many times
Before now
The sun spins
Stars glow and disappear
The night surrounds me
Even in the sun
I can't feel anymore
I see them around every corner
I reach out too late
Everything is too far away
I watch myself slip down
Muddy slope dirtying my soul
Wish that you could be here
Hold me close
Tell me it's all right
Push the daemons away
Let me be myself in your arms
But I don't know who you are
The knight I've given up on
The hero who doesn't exist
My life is anything but
The fairytale of your origin
But I'm falling down the well
Drowning in my confusion
Want to scream just to know
I'm still alive
My heart is still beating
Keep me from feeling numb
Keep them from hurting me
The pain is all that's real
And yet it can't be
Because only crazy people
Feel this way
And I can't be like that
I can't fall victim
To my own faults
Weaknesses are overcome
But I'm still slipping away
I want them to leave me
I want someone to help me
But I'm too scared to ask
Too weak to call out
Too blind to know where
I am supposed to be
In the midst of friends
I'm still so alone
So I dare to feel the thrill
Spill liquid poison
Into my mortal body
Maybe it'll remind me
Maybe it'll help me see
Maybe it'll wake me up
Maybe it'll show me
Maybe I'm still alive
But I'm alone with them
Losing control in their grasp
And I can't scream now
It's too late to call for you
Too late to ask for help
I'm fighting a losing battle
Against myself