i was fat
too fat
i wanted to change that.
so i did
i never ate
i was always moving
trying to exercise
i got skinny
too skinny
some people said
but i thought i
was still fat
so i kept on
it affected everything
i was different
i wasn't supposed to be
even when the sales lady
at the local mall
said they didn't have
a size small enough
i still didn't stop
that was a mistake
i should have stopped
before then
but i wasn't thinking straight
i was afraid
of everything
i knew i needed help
but not where to get it
i was afraid now
but i couldn't show it
give in
i had to be strong
so i kept on
i couldn't them
the gossiping ladies
from across the street
be right
no
i couldn't
that would make them right
after this had been going on for a long time
for a very long time
in my mind
i'm not sure how long
in reality
i was already far from it
i admitted i needed help
but i was still scared
not sure
what to do
so i did a google search
i know that sounds childish
but it saved my life,
among other things
i found chat rooms
and numbers to call
and a support person
and a bunch of friends
i went to meetings
and got alive
again
like before
finally i was ready
to face the world
so i did
and
i did a awesome job

it take a lot of courage to over come your weaknesses. every one of them is
going to be hard. this poem is about a anorexic woman i know. but the end
hasn't come true yet. i really hope it does. you have to admit you have a
problem, before you can solve it. i want you to do what you need to do
with this in your own way. maybe delete it. send it to your whole adderress
book. or hang it in the innermost depths of your closet, where no one can
see it. so you can see it and think, when you have the time.