I don't want to care anymore
Breathing is hard for fear of you
For fear of making you quake
My only remaining desire suffocates me
Reminds me each day of my inabilities
The lack of happiness I invoke in you
Wanting nothing but to make you smile
Then see you leave without a goodbye
Without acknowledgement or love
Wanting nothing more than to love you
And to be loved for my devotion

If I didn't care this would be smoother
The hurt sound in your voice
The anger wouldn't break my mind
Perhaps I could survive days without your voice
The calming note of my mornings
The soothing sound before sleep

But I lied to you
For all the devotion and love in my heart
I still hurt you
I caused the anger in your voice
The malice in your tone
The coldness of you touch
And I fear I may have caused the end
If not the end of our love
The end of the good part
The part filled with love and silent knowing
To begin the silent mocking hatred
And whispered words of disbelief
Unspoken thoughts of infidelity
I want to go back and fix my fault
To make this silence end
To make you love me again