Pain Goes With Death

by Katherine Chan

Introduction: A girl attending a private school finds herself in the middle of war. The invasion of her country isn't just for land, positioning or resources, but for something else. Something that every country in the world wants but only one tiny institution knows where it is, and they hold no allegiance to any government. This institution has now been all but wiped out, with only one member, their leader, Markus, still alive.

Chapter Title: Forgive Me, Forget Me

Coming UP: The series finale of "Pain Goes With Death". Will Liv live (sorry for the pun, not intended) if Katrina doesn't love her? Also, why did Katrina let Markus live?

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

{... Nikto nichego nikogda ne poymet

Takaya lyubov', iskusstvennyi med...}

(... Nobody, never, will understand anything

Such love is artificial honey...)

"Why didn't you do anything about it?"

"... Everything's changed..."

"Go away!"

"I thought you hated killing."

"I need you, Jen!"

"It's the clouds... Sound travels further than normal."

"Hurry up then! I have loads of assignments to do."

Whispers, voices, chasing me. Snippets of conversations, long ago. Asking, probing, always 'why'.

'Why didn't you...?'

'Why are you here...?'

'Why are you leaving...?'

Confusing, meaningless. A torrent of words, gone in a second, a minute, gone.

'Why didn't you kill him?'

A voice. Inside me. Accusing, repeating the same question.

'Why? You could have. It would have ended it all. Now he'll cause more trouble!'

Why? A chance. Something I didn't give all those others. Saw he might pick, might choose the right path. Had to give myself a reason to forgive myself. For all those others. Those I told myself I had to live for. And those who killed them.

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

Stumbling through forests, walking over rocks and through streams to confuse her, so that she can't track me. Can't let her hunt me, like an animal. Can't sense her anymore, but she's here, I know that. She isn't the kind to let go something that's done her harm. Like that even when she was three.

Born to a young man and woman, who knew nothing about mages. Witches told us she was the next one. Told the parents that we'd take her in, control the strange things that happened around her. Trapped her with greed. Both her's and mine.

Now she's back. Probably furious about the mistake she made, and how I entrapped her.

How do I avoid her? Can't run or hide forever. She'll find me one day, her the stronger and me the weaker for the years that have passed. Fight her now? She's furious, fresh wound to her, hatred of us. Let a while pass, let her calm down. I'll come back then, a better chance then.

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

The Americans have control over Australia still. Although they're suffering severe drops in morale from the stories of a shadow that kills and light that numbs the brain. Katrina dropped by my place a few days back. Saw how I'd been going, congratulated me on surviving. On being able to build a life in all the chaos around me.

I asked if she'd been to see Liv. Said she'd visited the night she arrived. Asked her if she had a place to stay. She'd arranged everything before she came here, apparently.

She asked about my family, if I'd been able to find them. They had thought that I'd been killed, and had escaped over to China. I managed to send a message to them, telling them I was alive and well. Haven't been able to find a way of getting over to China, to be with them.

Offered to take me to my family.

"How?"

"If I'm holding onto you, I can 'teleport' you over."

"REALLY?!"

"Yeah, that's right. Anyone and anything."

"Wow. Uhm... D'ya think Liv'll wanna come too? I mean, she'll probably be happier with us, over in China. Rather than here... where she lost everyone."

"You can ask her if you want."

A trip via 'Shadow Travel', appearing at Liv's place. Shocked the life out of her, almost. Told her about Katrina's offer. Where we'd be going, and to whom. She was shocked, that's for sure.

"I'd love to get out of here!"

She told us we could grab whatever we wanted to take over. Liv packed a small bag; we didn't really have that many prized possessions anymore, that we wanted to remind us of memories gone by. Went back to my place, got my stuff. We grabbed hold of Katrina's hand, and closed our eyes.

Opened our eyes when we felt warm sun on our faces. We'd appeared in a little street, with no-one around. Walked out onto the main street, and stared at all the happy faces, all the sounds and smells. Children running around singing, carefree, happy.

Been a long time since I've seen someone smile like they meant it.

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

Katrina procured some Euros from somewhere, exchanged them for yuan. Smiling, happy. We bought some food, ate it down like we'd just been through a famine. Which we kinda had, since we didn't get that much in our rations.

Flagged down a taxi, read off the address from one of Petra's letters. An apartment block. Rang the buzzer outside, heard them scream with joy when they realized who was waiting downstairs. Came pelting out through the gate, hugged Petra and me.

I turned to Katrina, but she wasn't there anymore. Realized she'd placed a small pouch in my hand, with all the money.

"Where'd she go?"

"Where'd who go, honey?"

"Katrina! She was just there!"

"Yeah, where'd she go?"

"Well, Petra, Liv... She'll come back if she wants to see you two."

"Maybe..."

[Inside the Apartment]

The pouch had a load of money in it. And a note.

'Liv, Petra,

The money is for the both of you to start up a new life her in China. Get identity cards, passports, whatever. Petra's parents should be able to point you in the right direction for all these.

When you read this, I'll be in America. I have to go to the source of all the trouble to free Australia again.

Don't worry, I won't try anything drastic like taking the President hostage or anything. I'll just persuade him that maybe taking over Australia isn't a good thing. Gotta talk to whoever orders the army too.

Look after yourselves,

Katrina'

She still wants to free Australia? Why can't she stay here, with us?

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

Find Markus first. Tell him I'm forgiving him. Forgiving him because he made a mistake all people do. Just that he had more power than others, causing more damage.

Tell him that it'd be greatly appreciated if he'd go to America. Pay the President a visit. Tell him that you're from that small group that knows where I am. Explain to him that I won't come to America unless he comes to visit me first, to bargain.

[Days Later]

"Well, Mr. President. Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Miss Dolohov. Umm... Nice place you have here."

I built the robots that built this place. Nice, shining hallways. Almost like home.

"Thankyou. Sooo, you're here to...?"

"We're here to offer you a deal. You understand that the situation here in Australia is getting a little strained, and we might be forced to drastic measures if some... issues aren't rectified.

Mr. Davy here tells me that you have some... powers. Perhaps if we make a deal, you might be able to bring peace to Australia, and we might not have to resort to some of our more... destructive options."

'Destructive' options? He's gotta be talking about those nuclear war-heads of his. It's agreed that no nuclear weapons will be used, ever again, but why on Earth does he insist on making more?

"I'm sure that if Mr. Davy told you that, then he would also have told you that I serve no-one but myself. This... deal as you said. If I lend you my services, then...?"

"You'll receive a permanent contract with us, and job-security will be absolutely phenomenal. You'll also be payed a million dollars a year."

'Job-security'? That means they'll need me forever. They'll try an invade more countries.

"I'm sorry, Mr. President, but I can't accept. You might not know this, but I was in one of your camps, at the beginning, when you organized the 'tournaments'. My memories of those times are not fond, and I do believe that many of my friends were killed in the first few weeks of the invasion. You will see, that I really can't work for someone who caused the deaths of my closest friends."

"You are an ineducated child! If what you say is true, then you didn't even finish senior high! You don't understand what the world is like now. You'll regret you rejected my offer, Dolohov. Men, fire!"

Bullets, red hot. Markus moves, barrier of light. The bullets impact, melt, vapourise.

"Mr. Davy? You are protecting someone who is resisting the new order! Take that barrier down and we'll forget any of this happened!"

He shakes his head. I smile inside. Shadows rise up, light twists. The President turns, runs, tries to escape. Entrap him in a cage of darkness and light. Tie his men to the ground. Markus brings his barrier down, and I move towards the President.

"'New Order', Mr. President? What's this I hear about brainwashing prisoners until all they can utter are 'The President of Australia is always right'? I do believe that you are violating even the basic rights of humans!"

"You don't understand. I gave them order, I gave them an environment where they could build a perfect world! And guess what they did? These failures of humans wallowed in memories of a time where suffering was all they had in the end!"

"These 'FAILURES of humans'?! They're more human than you, mister! Suffering wasn't all they had? They had joy, happiness, pride. And you just went along and took it all away, and brought them more suffering than they'd had before."

"No pain, no gain, Dolohov. And you think that, because you're one of them too!"

"One of THEM? You still don't know who and what we are, don't you? Didn't Markus here tell you that we aren't like you? Since he didn't, I'll tell you now. We aren't human. We have magic, Mr. President."

"Well, then go back to where you came from then!"

"Our planet was blown up years ago; this is our home now."

"Your a failure then! You had your planet blown up, we won't let that happen to this planet too!"

"Your 'more destructive options' would've blown up the planet too. We're survivors, not victims. There's a difference between the two, Mr. President. You've just got them mixed up."

"I'm a survivor, I've lasted over twenty assassination attempts. Don't you tell me I don't know the difference!"

"A survivor doesn't count the number of times they could have died. We count the number of times we saved others. The reason why there's been assassination attempts at all is because you've made so many people lose all they'd once had. And you? A survivor?"

"YES! I AM A SURVIVOR! And I will keep on surviving!"

"Not anymore."

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

{... Eta tema prosta,

Ty zhe znuesh kak byt'.

Nado prosto do sta doschitat' I zabyt'...}

(... The point is simple,

You know what you should do.

You should count up to 100, and forget...)

A woman in black and a man, talking to an old man. He tries to punch her, but the younger man blocks him easily. Suddenly, he starts to glow. Starts to split up, and disintegrates. The younger man bows, disappears. She turns and holds out her hand to me. I grab hold, don't want to let go. Pulls me close, holds me tight. Whispers:

'I've done what I had to do. You'll see when it's time for you to see me.'

She lets go of me, and steps back.

'I don't belong here, Liv. I'm sorry, but I can't stay.'

Hairline cracks appear, she's disintegrating.

'Don't live your life for anyone but yourself, Liv. Remember that you have a chance to make your own life now. Forget about me. I as good as never existed.'

Forget about HER?!

'NO...!'

Try to grab her, try to hold her together. Grasp nothing, only make her disintegrate faster as the particles whirl around like dust.

'Katrina...'

Crying. She blows a kiss, tears crawling down her face, glittering.

'I'm sorry... Love you. Always did. Always will.'

'I love you too.'

She disappears as I tell her this, and something shiny, glittering falls down, as if her tears had crystallized. A necklace of white gold, with a diamond set in gold at the pendant.

As I touch it, I wake. Jerk up straight, the necklace falls from my lap onto the floor.

Still crying, I put it on, and I hear her voice again, echoing through my mind.

*~7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/~*

So saaaaaaaaaaaaad... Me gone from high high high (as some of you might have seen during lunch) to saaaaaaaaaaad. WAAAAH!

Anyway.

If you still think Jen/Olivia/Petra/Hayley/Tess/Mr President/Markus/etc. is supposed to represent you, WELL S/HE AIN'T!! And none of them are supposed to represent me either. This is just the by-product of my mind sorting through tonnes of information, and occasionally, I come along and pick up the pieces and form them into a tapestry. OK, so it might end up as a clay tapestry (feel free to quote me*), but anyhoo. It's a TAPESTRY.

Well. That's an entire story done in three days. One chapter done on Saturday evening. Then three on Sunday. Could've done this yesterday, but we went washing machine shopping as mentioned before, and that took up a LOT of my time.

WAAAH! Me still sad after writing that... *sob* Hey, if you make a comment about this, I'll bang you on the head with a frying pan. I will! Seriously... Just 'cos I'm a insane lunatic running around doesn't mean I don't get sad SOME times.

Hey hey! If you leave a review (please do), and you have a school jersey, tell me what you've got written on it! And if you haven't got one yet (you're not in year 12, are you?), tell me what you want on yours!

Me wanna have 'K.E.D' written on it, but I don't think my parents will like it. So 'Kit-C' it is. Or something like it.

'Mad-man of'? Cos it'll say '06' below it, so it'll read 'Mad-man of 06'. Or maybe mad-girl. My parents still won't like it.

Signing off now,

Kit-C

7|-|3 5|-|4|)0\/\/ (5|-||_|7 |_|p!! 5|-|3 |)035|\|'7 r3pr353|\|7 |\/|3!!!)

Katrina Elena Dolohov (I know... I used my alias as The Shadow's name. Shut up. She still doesn't represent me.)

P.S. The first lyrics quotation is from 'Robot', again my t.A.T.u. Again, I just like the lyrics. Second lyrics quotation is from 'Doschitai Do Sta', also by t.A.T.u.

*The entire 'clay tapestry and feel free to quote me' joke is from Dilbert. A creation of Scott Adams. So DON'T quote it as being from me. It's from DILBERT.