A/N: Ok, this is a story I wrote for my English class. I didn't really know whether to post it under essay or another category though. But its kind of part of a novel I am going to write. It will be a chapter in it, but it will be a little different.

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Sometimes You Can't Go Back

him, it can't be him. Not now, not here. She took a step back and stumbled over a tree root jutting out of the ground. He reached out and grabbed her arm to keep her from falling. Once she had her balance again, he let go.
"Don't be scared, Sam?"
"Scared? Why are you here, Alan?"
"It's spring break back home. I needed to talk to you." Alan said.
"I have nothing to say to you. Nothing that I CAN say to you!" spat Samantha.
She was frozen. She felt like she was being held down by bricks. Breathing became like a chore, and then suddenly she turned and ran. She ran faster than she had ever run before. At first, she heard nothing. Then she heard Alan running after her. She did NOT want to talk to him. She never wanted to talk to him. As his footsteps got closer, she only ran faster. She ran until she reached the corner by the warehouse. Breathing heavily from the run, she stopped. She couldn't hear Alan any more, so she figured he gave up. But she was wrong. She saw him turn the corner and stop. He began to walk slowly towards her.
"I only wanna talk, Sam. Please, just talk to me." He begged.
"No! Why should I talk to you? It will only make things worse. I don't have anything nice to say to you," Samantha said, before turning away from him.
He grabbed her arm and gripped it tightly, "Please!"
"Let me GO!"
"Please, talk to me."
"HEY, LET GO OF HER!" They both heard someone yell.
Alan loosened his grip on Samantha. She ripped her arm away from him and rubbed her arm where he had grabbed it. She turned around to see Tim running towards them.
"Are you ok?" He asked Samantha, and then turned to Alan, "Who do you think you are?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. Go home, Alan. I don't want to talk to you. I never want to talk to you again. You wasted your time. So just go home and leave me ." Samantha said.
"Look, I'm not going to force you, but just think about it. I really want to talk, please; I'm begging you, just think about it. Here's the number to the hotel where we are staying. Please call me," Alan pleaded, taking out a piece of paper and writing down the phone number. He handed it to Samantha and, reluctantly, she took it.
"? Is this the same Alan you told me about? Sam, maybe you should talk to him. It might be both of you," Tim said.
With one last glance, Samantha turned away and walked back into the warehouse. Once inside, she sat down and stared at the piece of paper. She really didn't want to talk to him. Not after what he did to her. He hurt her, and she hated him for that. She crumpled up the paper and was just about to through it out when she heard a voice from behind her.
"Don't throw that out."
"And why not? It's not like I'm going to be calling him anytime soon," Samantha said, turning around to face Tim.
"Sit down, we need to talk. I know you don't like him, and I know that he hurt you. I can understand that, but you need to talk to him."
"But." Samantha interrupted.
"Let me finish," Tim said, "You need to talk to him. Not just for him, but for you. You say you hate him, yes, but I saw the look on your face. You wanted to talk to him, deep down inside, you wanted it. I know you want to find out why he did what he did and you want him to know how much he hurt you. Maybe this is your chance, tell him how you feel. Tell him how much he hurt you. Sam, tell him everything.
"No. I told myself I would never talk to him. I.I promised myself. I've moved on. I have a good life without him. Why should I go back now? I would be taking one step forward and two steps backward, not very productive."
"But it's very productive. You haven't moved on, it still bothers you, I know it does. You need to get some answers. Just think about it," Tim said, seeing that she was crumpling up the paper again, he added, "And I will take that, I'll keep it until you decide."
"Fine, I'll think about it, but I'm not making any promises."

Three hours later Samantha sat with her legs hanging over the side of an old wooden bridge over a small river about three blocks away form her hotel. She loved to sit at watch the sunset over the bridge. It was her favorite place to come and think after a long day. She thought the way the water reflected the sun was beautiful.
Samantha had excused her self from dinner, hoping no one saw her leave the restaurant. She needed to think about what she was going to do. Of course she knew she didn't want to talk to Alan. But did she? She needed answers, and hated that. She never wanted to talk to Alan again. Never, not even if her life depended on it; but her happiness did. She knew she needed answers. She, also, knew Tim knew that. She hated that after just a short time, Tim knew her so well. On the other hand, she loved it. She loved being able to talk to him about anything.
Samantha had been so caught up in her thoughts, that she didn't hear someone come up and sit down next to her, "Nice night isn't it?"
"Tim, you scared me? How did you find me?"
"Sam, I know you like to come here at night. You're here almost every night. Especially when you have something on your mind. In fact, last time I found you here, it was right after you had gotten that phone call from you friend, Jake. If I remember correctly, you were feeling homesick."
"You know me too well, you know that? Yeah, I'm thinking about what you said earlier. You're right, you know you are. God I hate when you're right. I do want to talk to him. I need to get some answers, but I don't want to hurt anymore. I never really got over it. I just buried it in the back of my mind and forgot about it. It a while, but then when I saw him today, all these old feelings just came flooding back."
"I know you're upset, but you really need to talk to him. Just call him, that's all you need to do and if it gets to be too much, hang up," Tim said.
"I know I need to talk to him, but if I do, it has to be in person. I can't do it over the phone.
"Oh, Tim, I don't know what to do. This is too much to deal with all at once." Samantha said, looking up at Tim. She was on the verge of tears and didn't think she could hold them back much longer.
Tim cupped her face and whispered, "Do what your heart tells you to do. You know, deep down, you want to talk to him. So do it; give him a call. Try to find a time when you two can get together. Don't be afraid to show your feelings, it won't hurt to take a chance."
"You're right, when we get back to the hotel, I will give him a call. I'm just so scared," Samantha said, leaning into Tim.
"I know you are; it's all going to be ok."
Tim moved in closer to Samantha and put his arm around her. She laid her head against his shoulder and started to cry. He kissed the top of her head and reassured her it was going to be alright. They stayed that way for another half hour or so.
Once they got back to the hotel, Samantha went into her room and called the number that Alan had given her. There were three rings and someone picked up, "Hello?"
"? It's me Samantha."
"Samantha, I'm so glad you called. I really wanted to talk to you about."
"Alan, calm down. I want to meet somewhere," Samantha said.
"Oh, ok. How about tomorrow afternoon, at about 1:00? Do you want to have lunch and we can talk then?" Alan said.
"Well." Samantha said, glancing over at Tim, "Yeah, sure, lunch sounds good. How about we meet at that quaint little café around the corner from where I work. Their food is pretty good. We eat there for lunch sometimes," Samantha said.
"Ok, that sounds great. So I will see you tomorrow at 1:00."
"Yeah, see you then. Bye Alan."
"Bye, Sam."

The next day at 1:00, she left to meet Alan at the café. Before leaving, Tim stopped her and pulled her to the side.
"Are, you sure you don't want me to come with you. It's not too late to ask you know."
"I'm sure; I need to do this alone." Samantha said.
She walked out of the warehouse and started for the café. It was a beautiful day and hoped if he was there, Alan had picked a table outside. As she rounded the corner, she could see the café, and saw a few couple sitting outside the café. She looked around and saw Alan waving her over. He was sitting at a table in the back of the patio sipping an iced tea. She walked over to the table and as she sat down, a waiter came over.
"Would you like some think to drink, Madame?" The waiter asked.
"Yes, please, I would like an iced tea, and I would like to order. I will have the chicken cesar salad, dressing on the side, and a cup of French onion soup."
"And for you, Monsieur?"
"I'll have the same."
"I'll be right out with that," the waiter said, turning to leave.
"I'm glad you called last night."
"Why did you come here? Are you trying to cause problems for me, or does it just come naturally?"
"I wanted to talk to you. I wanted to apologize for the way I treated you last year," Alan said.
"Treated me? You didn't treat me like anything. You simply didn't talk to me. Do you have any idea how much that hurt? After being friends for so long, you just ignored me." Samantha said.
"You iced tea, Madame. Your soup will be right out," The waiter said, putting down Samantha's iced tea next to her.
"Thank you," Samantha said, smiling up at the waiter.
"I don't know why I did that, Sam, I was immature last year, and it was stupid. You were my best friend, and I threw that all away, just so I could have "popular" friends." Alan said.
"But you did do it. Yes it was stupid. I didn't even know why. Was I that bad of a friend?" Samantha said
"No you were a great friend; you were always there for me. I ruined everything. I'm sorry."
The waiter came and set there soup in front of them. They sat in silence and ate their soup. When they fished, they continued they're conversation.
"Look, Alan, I don't know why you came here. If it weren't for Tim I wouldn't even be here right now. He made me realize that I never really moved on. I still care about you, and I miss you, the old you. I came here today because I want answers. I want to know why you did what you did. I want the explanation I never got." Samantha said.
"I came here today because I miss you. I thought maybe if I could talk to you, things could go back to the way they used to be. We've always been able to do that. I don't know why I did what I did. I guess I figured, maybe I would become more popular. Face it; we weren't really part of the "cool crowd." It worked, for a little while. Then I started to get lonely, I didn't have anyone I could really talk to. You were the only one I trusted enough to tell everything, but you seemed so happy, I didn't want to ruin that," Alan said.
"So you thought you would ruin it now? That makes no sense," Samantha said.
"No, after so long, I just couldn't do it anymore, I had to talk to you. So I found out where you were from Jake."
They talked for another ten minutes when the waiter came and took their soup bowls and placed the salads down. They ate those in silence as they had done with the soup. When they finished eating they resumed their conversation.
"So what, you thought you would have a little conversation with me and all would be right in the world?" Samantha asked.
"No, not really. I didn't think it would be that easy. I new I would have a long ay to go before I could gain your trust again. I lost it along time ago; I know that, but I though, maybe, we could try again," Alan said.
"How do I know you won't turn around and do it again? How do I know you won't hurt me again?"
"I won't do it again. You can be sure of that. I don't want to lose you again," Alan said.
"I don't know that, though. Like you said, you lost my trust a long time ago. You may get a second chance in a lot of things, but this is not one of them. You will never get my trust back. I don't want to get hurt again: go through all that again. It was too much for me," Samantha said.
"It won't happen again. I promise. You won't get hurt. I didn't mean to put you through that. I didn't know you where in that much pain. You hid it so well," Alan said.
"I had to hide it well. I couldn't let anyone see how I felt. From my point of view. You were just trying to get to me. Trying to see how lonely I could get. I wasn't about to let you win. That would just give you what you wanted and I don't play that way." Samantha said.
"Please, Sam, just give me one more chance. I'll do anything!" Alan pleaded
"Say I do give you a second chance. What if you do it again? What if you want to be "popular" again? What happens to me then? Do I go through that all over again? And if you do it? What do I do then? Do I give you another chance? We would just be going in a around in a never ending circle. Our friendship would be like a broken record, so to speak, and you know that. I don't want to be hurt again, Alan. I don't want to have to do that, to go through that again."
"You won't have to. If you give me a second chance, I give you my word; I won't treat you like that ever again. Even if I do, which I won't, I won't ask for another chance," said Alan.
"But you did it once! I can't trust you not to do it again. The answer is no, I will not give you a second chance," Samantha said.
"Alright, I won't you push anymore. I'll back off and let you have your space. But know this, I still, and always will, care about you."
Samantha picked up her purse and dug out her wallet. She took some money out of it and set it down next to Alan. She stood up and got ready to leave.
"That's for my share of the lunch," She said turning to leave.
"No, lunch is on me. I wasted your time. Take it as an "I'm sorry for wasting your time" gift," Alan said, handing the money back to Samantha.
"But you didn't waste my time,' Samantha said, not taking the money.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, now I can finally move on," Samantha said as she turned to leave.
"Oh, and Alan," Samantha called back, "I still care about you, too, but sometimes you just can't go back."

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A/N: Please review, I think I did pretty well, but I want to know what other people think. I haven't even handed it in yet. .please review. Even flames are welcome, but I would prefer no flames.