THE DIARY OF AN INSANE BUNNY CULTIST

(Only somewhat slightly kind of maybe based on reality) Day 1
Today is the most important of all days for the building of a foundation that can withhold a strong, single-minded government. It is necessary to dispatch our secret-rabbit-police upon all rebels to quell any uprisings that may prevent our dear leader's rise to dictatorial power. Must sleep. After looping toys R' us singing rabbit video for a half an hour or so. (OCC: This is one of the true parts, sadly.) Must make up and publish false advertising for the benefit of leader. Could perhaps have saved mice from fire, babies from plane crash, small children or fish from anti-rabbit party rebels. Must find way to take advantage of rodent nation in serious depression and unemployment.

Day 6
Have not slept. In two days. Dictatorial government making steady incline to power of office. Must write leader's speech. Must invent more pro-rabbit propaganda. Money isn't worth anything anymore. Should kill people.

Day 9
Pro-Rabbit Propaganda and veggi-tale-like demagoguery sinking into head of desperate, leaderless rabbits. Have increased mob. President very nearly holds complete office. Was sooo, sooo easy. But cannot sleep or take lunch brakes. Glowing mice constant bother. Constant insane chatter about anti-rabbit dictatorial control and toast driving me crazy

Day 20
Consider the days of democracy and 'free' elections over. Well I mean we will still be having a democracy, technically, and we will hold elections, but we will only need the name of our leader on the ballet. Should still kill people. We will need some way to stay in office. I think I shall invent a reptilian scape-goat so that our gov't can occupy ourselves in the hunt for injust rodents and their slithery, evil, snakey accomplices. Oh yes...yesh..yesh...MUAHAHAHH...

Day 25
Sent in white ears to wipe out Mouse-party. Next...next we shall target hampsters. Then when there is absolutely no political competition, we will be free to create a new democracy for the people of our rodent world. Yesh...I think I shall send some little mousies on...vacation...permanent vacation...

Day 30
Successfull wipe out of Hampster and Mousie parties. Must move on to more obscure, less powerfull radicles. We can afford no variety of thought. All hail the Rabbit Party! Mahahah mahahah hahahahahaha muahahahah. *cough* Anyways. President's day is tomarro.

Day 35
As yes, yesh...we wipe the little flea radicles away. There have been a high percentage of political retirements and vacations of late. I do hope that they enjoy their stay. Muaha- wait, one more thing, have not been sleeping. But I have arranged a rabbit army masquerading as developers of our fine rodent nation. Need to find more scapegoat-able minorities...now...*clearing of through* Muahahah muahahh mah hahahah mu ah ha ha ha ha mahahahah...

Day 40
Shoooo... boring. There is absolutely nothing to write about. We have destroyed most diversity, raised an army to conquer other mammal nations, quieted a good portion of rebels and turned our country into a respectable militaristic and slightly Rabbit-Party worshiping society. Ohh, leader felt like passing law that said all classrooms must have a picture of Himself hung up in them.

Day 45
Cannot sleep. Don't understand. All is going well. White-Ears going around, raiding and beating as usual...governmental peace and rest... President passed another law- all schools must have a Peter Cottontail based curriculum. Have abandoned all world history to worship Cottontail and others. Have decided to scapegoat all farming animals since Peter C. Was chassed by a farmer. Method of execution shall be...?

Day 60
Ohhh...Writing has become skim. Have become an insomniac rabbit. .. Have begun to see glowing mice following me. Chanting insanely about anti- rabbit dictatorial control and toast. Toast is good. Dammit. Being rodent I cannot eat toast. Wonder if can-shoo tired-scapegoat glowing mice.

Day 62
I have not slept. There is an increase of glowing mice in my peripheral vision. I hear chanting all day long while I am blacklisting capitalist reptiles and rodents. So boring. Career destroying is only amusing for so long. Leader passed law saying that all mice must be removed from school. Mice are not allowed to hold jobs. Damn Glowing mice...must sleep. The President is acting strange.

Day 62

Oh GOD OF RODENTS! BUNNY GOD! The mice...the mice...THE MICE!!! They are EVERYWHERE. Glowing, chanting..anti-rabbit party. I am starting to hear their music as reason. I must talk to my dear leader about his strange behavior.

Day 63

Day 64

Day 70

Day 80

Day 90

Day 100...