When I’m Ready

 

 

I can’t put into words the pain that grips my heart,

I can’t express how it feels, to have your love torn apart,

I can’t know yet, whether you can help ease my pain,

I can’t tell you whether, I’ll learn to breathe again.

 

I just don’t know, if I can smile once more,

I just don’t know, if I can lift myself from the floor,

I just don’t know what, or how, I feel today,

And I just don’t know if I can live, conditions this way.

 

I know you’re not going anywhere, until I explain what’s wrong,

I know you’re not going to let go of me, ‘til I at least finish this song,

I know you want my love, but that’s just it, I don’t know if it’s mine yet to give,

But I know what you’re still telling me is true, that life’s there to be lived.

 

I’m hoping you’ll stay, that you’ll always be around,

I’m hoping you’ll be here, when I finally get up from the ground,

I’m hoping that when I’m happy, when I know I love you,

I’m hoping that you’ll maybe still love me then, too.

 

I hate making you wait, ‘cause I know it’s not fair,

I hate it that I won’t just go ahead and dare,

But, I hated the fact that he tore my heart apart,

And I‘d despise how I’d be, not loving you from the start.

 

So here I am, writing these words for everyone to read,

But know these words are for you, and they are my plead,

Know I love you in my heart, but I can’t yet give that love to you,

So know my love’s more than skin deep, it runs my whole soul through.

 

So baby, don’t ask me for a while, what I feel,

I know I love you really, I know that that much is real,

But for the rest, I’m unsure, so give me space for a while,

Take just a step back, and when I’m ready, we’ll be going for miles.

 

 

A/N: Hmm, I actually like this poem...I think.  Some bits still need improving though.

 

 

Anyway, if you’ve taken the time to read my drabbles, Please Review, would bemuch appreciated.

 

Written 16th April, 2004, Redrafted 22nd June 2004.

 

-Carrie