Complicated Love
I can't begin to untie these intricately knotted events of love
They are too inner-twinned to be undone
I remember when is it first started
Beneath the falling sun
I admitted my love, when I though you were too perfect
Just to see what you would do
Then before I knew it, you admitted that you loved me too
For a month and a half I thought I was in heaven
Then I was lost in the wilderness, it happened so sudden
I didn't need you to say anything
I knew it. . we were through
I layed in the darkness for many nights and started to cry
You had told me you loved me, was that just a lie?
What did I do to deserve this cold rejection, when you didn't even give me
a reason?
No words were spoken from your soft lips, no explanation for ignoring me
I began spiraling and falling into the shadows of my soul
Hanging on to light, yet wanting so badly to let go
Silence and emptiness filled me as I took each blow
Every night I fell asleep crying over you
And when I awoke, the nightmare was true
'Should I get up or should I stay?'
What difference would it have made anyway?
I tried to remember all the moments filled with light
And forget all the dark, tear-filled nights
Then a friend came in to assist
He gave me a shoulder to lean on; but still, it was you that I missed
My new Romeo and I became rather close
And told me he loved me more than anyone before. . that he loved me the
most
So, thinking you had forgotten our precious memories
I fell into his open embrace
But still I continued to cry and cut
What do you think of me, was I just your little slut?
With blood and silent tears my debt is repaid
My debt, for all the unintentional mistakes I have made
Like trusting you with my glass heart
Even though I knew it would tear me apart
What once were smiles turn into frowns
The painful memories have gotten me down
Yet people tell me, 'this soon shall pass'
In the mean time, my new Romeo is treating me right
He lavished me with love
And days where he would come to my house just to hold me tight
But soon rumors start to occur and he can't just take it anymore
And soon he leaves, "We'll still be friends right?" he had asked
Yet it's not like it was before
Now I'm alone, with no one to love me
Both of you ignore me like I'm not there
I can't breathe, there is no air
Two heartbreaks in two weeks isn't worth it
I can't take this shit!
A human heart isn't made to take this much pain
Wanted for a moment, then tossed aside in shame
You drop me-I shatter
And pull back together
But when I see both of you I shall tip-up my chin
Because this girl refuses to give in
. . But then it all comes crashing back
About how I loved both of you so
I start to fall again, deep into the pit of depression
I'm tired of caring at all
Because it hurts too much to fall
I'm tired of wondering why
It ended before we even really got the chance to try
So as I sit here in the darkness, and try to unknot these intricately
twinned events
Remember this tail of lies, love, and lust
The story of my life
Of my Complicated Love

Please Note: I did use some verses from other poems (they were my muses,
and helped me to word it just right) but if you notice a verse form your
poem that you would like me to remove, just give me an e-mail and I'll be
more than happy to remove it (just know I did not mean to steal your
verses. . . they just seamed perfect to describe my indescribable
emotions/feelings)
Thank You for reading my poem, please review, I would Love to hear what
you have to say. . .even flames are welcome. . because I'm already burning
in hell, and the flames will just help me burn faster. . . and a head of
time I would like to thank anyone who reviews (flamers or praisers) Your
words are what keep me writing.
Love, Peace, and Broken Hearts,
Jennifer