I couldn’t believe it when morning arrived. Everything had went by so quickly, and then it also felt like forever since I had seen my sister. We woke up really early at five, and I must admit, keeping those kids awake until we had eaten breakfast was a hard thing to do.

Last night after Miranda had went to sleep I had asked Pricilla what size did they all wear. I wanted to get them something nice so that their mother would know how beautiful they all were. I must say, I worked a little magic on their hair. You could immediately tell that it had been shampooed, and their hair turned out to be very curly.

I had them all dressed and after breakfast they were just as ecstatic as ever. I had thought about calling our parents at a nursing home, but I didn’t have their number.

“Are we going to see Momma now?” Miranda asked me as we all got into the car. The girls had cute ribbons in their hair and the boys were dressed so cute that I stopped at a portrait studio and got their pictures taken right away. Okay so, maybe I didn’t, but I really wanted to.

“Yes we are,” I answered in a singsong voice.

The girls burst out in a round of giggles and squeals.

Pricilla looked at me as I casually drove, and she watched the scenery with interest. Many people walked on the streets, paying attention to where they were going and nothing else. Just like me, they took everything they regularly did for granted.

“It’s so nice,” she said to no one in particular. “When you go back to New Jersey do you think Momma would change, like let us take baths in scented water and make us food?” She looked directly at me, hopeful. “Do you think she’ll tell me I won’t have to do the dishes and that she would? Would she buy us new clothes so that we would look nice to see someone?”

I could tell what she wanted the answers to be, but I honestly doubted it. Roxanne and I were so different that even if she wanted orange juice she’d order something else if I had orange juice first.

“I don’t know Pricilla, but I hope so,” I answered honestly. Still, she smiled and continued looking out the window.

While looking outside she asked me, “Is New Jersey like this?”

I thought about it. “I live in Hopewell close to Princeton. They call New Jersey ‘The Garden State’ and our state flower is the violet.”

“Do you like it?” she asked me.

“Yes,” I told her. “Moving to New Jersey was the best thing that’s happened to me.”

“Can I visit you there one time?” she asked me. “All of us, even Momma. She’s really a good person and I love her a lot, I’d hate to leave her. She’s had it rough Auntie. She met men and then she…she…got pregnant and didn’t know them. She really thought she fell in love when she met Jesse’s dad, but he used to hit her. He yelled at me once and then he hit me, and my momma screamed at him and we left.

“I don’t think she really goes out to get jobs, I think she just leaves so that she won’t have to see us and feel guilty. She really loves us, I know it, she tells us and she shows us. She really tries. She was so sad when Rosie and Jesse were taken away and even worse when Rachel decided to live with her daddy. She got real depressed and cried a lot and smoked a lot more.”

That was the first time I had really thought about what Pricilla thought of her mom. I never would’ve thought that any of that stuff had happened to her. She was always selfish and irresponsible, but she was capable to love and usually when she said she loved you she really meant it. I had never thought to wonder, how did she feel when she lost her kids. I never had the chance to ask her.

“She told me about you,” she continued. “She always talked about you with me. She told me everything. She told me that she really did miss you and that she had me to fill up the empty hole in her heart. She did love you Aunt Hazel, and she always told me so. She said that she wished you two had a better relationship and that she wanted to find you and tell you about us.

“She said that she loved you more then she hated you. She told me never to tell anyone that I hate them because more than likely it won’t be true. Then she’d cry and say you probably forgot about her, but she said she’d never forget you.”

Pricilla looked at me then, waiting for my response. I couldn’t say anything though, I felt so bad. All that time I had been regretting even coming, except for meeting my nieces and nephew and taking care of them while Roxanne was in the hospital. I never really thought of Roxanne with good thoughts, they were mostly or always bad.

“I wish I knew,” I finally said quietly.

“Knew what Mommy?” Scotty asked from the backseat. “You look sad.”

I smiled and shook my head. “I wish I knew…where I could park.”

---

“Mrs. Peterson?” a doctor approached me as soon as we got to the maternity ward. I nodded and the doctor stuck his hand out for me to shake.

“Yes,” I answered.

“I’m Dr. Washiston, Miss Williams’s obstructionist,” he told me. “I’ll show you to her room. Would you like to be in for the c-section?”

Was he really asking me this? “No,” I firmly told him. “I’m watching seven kids, three are hers.”

“Okay,” he said and then he led us to a room.

We knocked on the door and heard a moan. “Come in.”

I opened the door and Dr. Washiston walked off. The room was tiny and I could hear the tv on . We’d have to push a green curtain aside so that we could see her. Before I could say go, Miranda bolted through the drapes.

“Momma!” she cried, and I heard her bounce on the bed. “Momma!”

“Miranda?” I heard Roxanne ask in shock. “What, how? You look gorgeous, where in the world did you get that dress?”

“Prissy and Jake are here too!” she cried. “And Aunt Hazel got them for me. She even put a ribbon in my hair.”

“Hazel…where is she?” Roxanne asked weakly.

“Out there,” Miranda said, pointing at the curtain. I pushed Pricilla gently so that she’d know that she could go in, and she grabbed Jacob’s hand.

“Hi Momma,” Pricilla said timidly.

“Hey Honey,” Roxanne said, a hint of happiness in her voice. “You look so beautiful and…Jacob, you look like a grown man I almost didn’t recognize you. Come shower your Momma with tons of kisses.”

We heard smooch sounds and giggles, and I almost didn’t want to go in. They sounded so happy, just like they were supposed to.

“Where is your aunt?” Roxanne had asked.

“She’s here waiting,” Pricilla told her.

“Come out Hazel,” Roxanne said wearily. “I need to speak to you.”

Slowly, but confidently I walked away from my safe haven, and into Roxanne’s presence. The kids followed, but I only saw her.

She looked scared a little, but I could see that the sight of her children lighted up her eyes. Her skin was still pale and an I.V. was sticking from her bony hands. She however smiled. “Thank you so much for bringing them,” she said. “I’m okay now.”

“Roxanne, you have to…have a cesarean,” I told her. “It’ll be okay though, your doctor is here and—”

“I know,” she said calmly. “It is surgery and my baby will be born prematurely…again. I’m not scared; they had to do that with Jesse because he was so big. I’ll be fine. I’m just glad you came.”

She smiled, and I knew that she was sincere about it.

---

“The doctors said it was a good thing that I had this c-section,” Roxanne told me. She looked at me, her hazel eyes gleaming with exhilaration. “The baby was five pounds and one ounce, but it probably would’ve been bigger by the time it was born.”

"I'm glad the baby is okay."

"Well, it's going to have to be here for a while," she said. "I won't be able to bring it home right away."

“Why do you keep saying 'it'?” I asked her.

“Because…I haven’t named her yet,” she told me.

“Oh,” I said. We were quiet for a while, just looking at each other.

“Thank you so much for being here for me,” Roxanne told me, and she looked me directly in my eyes. “I’m going to do better now that I know you’re rooting for me.”

I nodded. “Of course I am, and whenever you want, you can visit me.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

I grinned. “Your house is in serious need of a maid.”

“I’m going to be a better mom,” she promised me. “I’m going to keep the refrigerator full. I mean, we’re on welfare already.” She smiled when she said that. “I can do better. All I have to do is clean up and buy clothes and pay the bills.”

“If you need anything let me know,” I said.

The sun outside was shining although you could easily tell it was a cool day. I was sitting with Roxanne and we were just chatting while the kids played around. These were the talks that I longed to have with her, except this time they were better. We were able to change our feelings for one another, and that’s all I ever wanted.

“I will,” she told me. “I just miss my brothers so much.”

“So do I,” I nodded. “If you talk to them, give them my cell phone number.”

“I wish they could see how well off you are,” she told me. “You have beautiful kids. I’m hoping one day I can get custody of Jesse and Rosie, and maybe Rachel would want to come home. Then we'll all invite you back or something.”

I nodded and then we both looked at the tv for a minute.

“I have something for you Roxanne,” I told her, and I asked Scotty to pass me my purse. He quickly gave it to me and went back to what he was doing.

“You got me something?” she asked.

I nodded. “I almost gave it up thirteen years ago, but I never found the time.”

I felt through my purse until I felt something cold. I pulled out what I have saved, and what I brought just for this occasion. I looked at Roxanne as she stared at it as if it were an engagement ring.

“You kept this all of these years,” she asked. “I always wanted this.”

“You gave me this to remember you by, remember?” I asked her, and I set the necklace in her hand. It was the necklace that held my memories of running away, my journey. It held Ryan, the night I got caught, when I escaped from the police, Lillian and Rose, it held everything. The diamonds glittered like the tears I had shed and the rubies glimmered like blood.

“Well this is for you to remember me until we meet again.”

Our eyes met and she smiled. “Thank you so much Hazel. That was the best gift you could’ve ever given me.”

---

“Have you come up with a name for your daughter?” I asked her. “I mean, the newborn one.”

It was later that evening, I had stayed for so long. I would’ve stayed the night, but the kids were tired and I wanted them to sleep comfortably. The diamond and ruby necklace was around Roxanne’s neck and she did touch it from time to time, to see if everything was real.

The evening was still, but we’d often hear babies crying from outside the room.

She laughed. “I think she may be our look-alike again. How about you name this one Hazel?”

“Oh I couldn’t,” I beamed. Roxanne was so sweet to give me the honor of doing so.

“Yes you can,” she told me. “When I look at her I want to see you. When I look at me I want to see you. This baby is restoring my hope and my faith.”

“How about… Gabrielle Elizabeth Williams,” I suggested.

She grinned. “I like it. She looks like a Gabrielle, or at least she did when I last saw her.”

I giggled.

“I missed you,” I told her.

“I didn’t have to miss you Hazel,” Roxanne said. “You’ve always been with me, in my heart.”