Author's note: No knowledge of computers is necessary to appreciate the humor in these anecdotes, based on human and computer stupidity.

My experience as a computer-illiterate Linux User

Or

Attempts at getting my Linux machine to do what I want it to do:

This is from a terminal I tried to use:

michellejimi michelle wump

bash: wump: command not found

michellejimi michelle xboing

bash: xboing: command not found

michellejimi michelle xbill

bash: xbill: command not found

michellejimi michelle paranoia

bash: paranoia: command not found

michellejimi michelle dammit, where are all the old games I used to play?

bash: dammit: command not found

michellejimi michelle fuck you too

bash: fuck: command not found

michellejimi michelle your hobby, not mine...

bash: your: command not found

michellejimi michelle geez you're stupid...

??

cool

I can write anything I want??

jeez you're stupid

??

cool

I can write anything I want??

bash: jeez: command not found

bash: ??: command not found

bash: cool: command not found

bash: I: command not found

michellejimi michelle damn, back to the old command not found routine, eh?

bash: damn: command not found

michellejimi michelle eh?

bash: eh?: command not found

michellejimi michelle

What's worse, the commands wump, paranoia, xboing, and xbill would have worked if I'd been using my old machine... wump was a game called hunt the wumpus, which was basically a kind of basic, text-based role-playing game. Paranoia was another text-based role-playing game, where you were basically some kind of clone trying to destroy Christmas. Fun game... Too bad I never beat it. xboing is one of those bouncy-ball games where you bounce the ball on some platform, and it destroys blocks for points. And xbill consisted of rescuing computers from becoming toaster ovens.

The only thing I am capable of doing:

michellejimi michelle mount /mnt/floppy

michellejimi michelle umount /mnt/floppy

michellejimi michelle

Mounting and unmounting floppy disks and CD-ROMs is one of the things that happen automatically in the Windows systems. I was forced to learn this skill in order to be able to transfer my documents over to my Dad's Windows computer.

On a final note:

michellejimi michelle I need to read Rescued by Unix

bash: I: command not found

michellejimi michelle