Inspiration

My fingers fell into the familiar rhythm of the song I had finished just a week ago. They glided faultlessly across the sea of black and white beneath them, weaving in and out of each other in a harmonious dance. The end of the piece approached and the music slowed until silence took over the room. I sighed in satisfaction and in a little frustration. God, what are the right words for this song, I asked silently. I searched my mind for lyrics worthy of the beautiful song. I fiddled around with the keys, plucking out the melody while I sang different strings of words that might fit with it. Not satisfied with anything I came up with, I began to grow impatient and hit a group of keys at once. The notes ground against each other and produced an ugly, dissonant chord.

As I sat in the ensuing silence, I gazed aimlessly around the dimly lit music room. My eyes slid across the opposite wall until they fell upon a little chestnut colored table sitting comfortably in the corner. A Bible rested quietly on top. I made my way over to the secluded little table and gently picked up the thick Book. Placing myself back at the black, glossy piano bench, I absent-mindedly flipped through different sections. I scanned the pages for possible verses that I could transform into lyrics until one captured my eye. "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry our their wicked schemes." I read the passage again, focusing on the first line: "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him".

The words weighed down heavily in my mind, making me realize that I had let my impatience take hold of the situation. God would provide me with words. I just had to be still and wait for them. I smiled at the sudden reminder I had just received and set the Bible on top of the piano. I stood up and walked towards the kitchen. Minutes later I was sitting back at the bench but with a steaming cup of hot chocolate warming the palms of my hands. The house echoed with silence as I waited for my beverage to cool. My thoughts drifted with the steam that rose out of the cup and were carried away into the past where I remember a certain Wednesday night…a night that had triggered the beginning of the path that led me to the bench I was currently sitting on.

That particular Wednesday at Kankakee First Church was not a routine one. Pastor Ryan decided to replace his usual message to the youth group with a "hang out" time where we had snacks and socialized while the Cubs game blared out of two giant speakers. A piano sat off to the side and I ended up at the bench, playing one of the songs I had made up myself. A crowd gathered around me, including Pastor Ryan who asked me if I had ever taken lessons. At my negative answer, his face turned into an incredulous stare that was quickly replaced with an excited one. That night he told me I had a gift and that music was the most important tool used in ministry today.

Hearing what had happened, my mom prayed for some way to come up with a piano. She bought an old player piano in excellent condition for thirty-five dollars the next day at St. Paul's Episcopal Church. A while later, I started taking piano lessons and time found me at my current position as a Christian songwriter. I swam in my memories and smiled fondly. I owed it all to Him. He led me every step of the way, teaching me and showing me where to go. It was then, after thinking about my past, that what I needed to do with the song hit me. I set the now cold drink on the piano, and placed my hands on the pearly, white keys. I finally realized that this song was not meant for words. I smiled as I let my fingers fall into the familiar rhythm once more and dedicated that song to Him, my Lord, my God…my Inspiration.