Kairi-16

email: YingFa16@aol.com

this is my own writing.....

they tell me to grow up

every time i am around the people who tell me this i feel five years old

when i`m around my friends it is as if i revert back to being a five year old

i laugh with a freeness that they do not understand

for a person who is in my shoes i have no worries

or do i?

what do you see?

what ever i let you think

when i am around friends i want to be that five year old

no worries, no cares

around you i feel as if i am five years old, because that is how you treat me

laughing

music

friends

games

my looks like this to you

that`s how i want it

i don't want it any different

i want this image of me to stay forever

it keeps me young
i never want to grow up

i might become what you want me to be

if i stay as i am i am me

so deal

i don't want to change

i have to face the future some time

why does it have to be now?

i like the way that i am

no problems

my laughter rings out and everyone looks at me

they have a face that looks like it has seen many years

i know different

half of them are barely old

some only being in there twenty first year

it`s all this pressure of growing up

why do we have to?

i want to stay this care free five year old that you think i act like

acting and doing is different

what you see is not really what is going on underneath

i am nerves

scared

passionate

crying
then we get back to laughing and the five year old side i want to show all the time

i grew up to fast for my own good

i was five going on to be 30

which is strange

while my friends played i had to sit at home doing house work and make sure you where fine

i didn't want to lose you

still don't

but instead of you being the grown-up going on five

why don't i be the 16 year old reverting back to five

i never lived a childhood i should have

not blaming you

i could have walked away not caring

but i did, so i stayed

no i have a chance to play

i don't want you to say act your age

because i wont, i`ll act how i feel

like a kid waiting pop at the seems to do something

you just have to get over it

this is me

the five year old

and the 16 year old