The essence of life
A small fabric in time
What little value to me
Me who has nothing

Was born with nothing
Will die with nothing
No love, no one
Leaving with tears

I want to pierce myself
Grab a knife and plunge
Pop some pills and die
Or at least try

Jump off a building
Run into a car
Crash into a tree
Break my own neck

No one would miss me
Would anyone cry?
No pallbearers, no funeral
Just a hole in the ground

I should dig my grave
Dig a hole
Or maybe jump into the sea
And feed the fishes

Would she care?
No! She would go on
Live life to the fullest
And not shed a tear

Does she care?
Does she feel?
Would she cry?
Would she scream?

I was but a friend
Soon to be a memory
A wisp in time
A fragment in life

I have no one to miss
No one to care for
No one to live for
No one to inspire

I need to shout
I need to scream
I need to kill
I need to die

Drown my pain
Drown my sorrow
Drown my emotions
Drown my being

Wash away my pain
Wash away my guilt
Wash away my love
Wash away everything

Yet she won’t notice
Won’t be bothered
Won’t care
Won’t cry

She’ll be too busy
Busy with her boy
What little impact
My death would have

So now I sharpen my knife
Tie my knots
Rev my car
Write my goodbyes

For even in death I make no impact
No mark on this world
Touched no one
Inspired few

I don’t need a funeral
Don’t need anyone to cry
Don’t need the world
Don’t need life

I will embrace death
Stretch out my arms
Reach for it
And pray it engulfs me
So thank you and good bye
Whoever reads this
Remember my legacy
Pray for my soul
Thank you my friends
I’ll remember you

Copyright© Chan Zhungyi® 7 June 2004