CHAPTER THREE

“Ella?”

Her mother’s surprised face peeked between the slit of the door that was opened. It was near 10 o’clock, and being a person that was early-to-bed and early-to-rise, she was wearing a hastily donned bathrobe that she threw on when a mysterious knock came on the door.

Smiling wanly at her mother’s expression, Ella stepped into the light so she could see her better. “Hi, mom.”

“Ella!” Her mom practically shouted, flinging the door open to reveal her entire self. By the look of her messed up gray hair and the distinct red mark on the side of her face, she had been sleeping peacefully for at least an hour before Ella had woken her up. All signs of sleep were gone from her though when she saw her only daughter on her doorstep. She flung her arms around Ella, crushing the 25 year old to her chest. “Oh we’ve missed you so much! What brings you here?”

Ella was, for a split second, was a bit too emotional to answer. She had missed her parents greatly the last few years, and even though she had kept correspondence with them through letters and phone calls, it felt good to see her mother’s face again. “I had some business in Seattle, mom, and I couldn’t just travel across the world and not come home, and possibly beg for a place to stay for a while, if that’s alright with you.”

Her mother only squeezed her tighter. “Of course, honey. I wouldn’t dream of turning you out.” She released Ella, sliding an arm around her shoulder to lead her through the door. “You father will get your luggage out of the car for you.” She called down the hallway. “Harold! Harold! Wake up! Ella’s come home!”

“Erm, mom.” Ella said, feeling a bit guilty. “Dad doesn’t have to get my luggage. I didn’t bring any with me.”

Her mom looked confused. “Didn’t bring anything with you? No suitcase?”

“I was in a hurry…..” Ella managed to spit out before her dad stumbled out of the dark hallway, flipping a switch to light up the room.

Unlike her mother, her father had neglected to put on a robe and was wearing a grey undershirt and a pair of boxers. He rubbed his eyes to rid himself of the bleariness, focusing on their visitor. “Why, there she is!” He smiled crookedly. He held his arms out. “C’mere. Give me a hug, little girl.”

Ella didn’t think twice, letting herself get swallowed up by her father’s large frame. He was a tall man, Ella’s head only coming to his chest. Throughout her childhood she had always felt safe from the bullies in the world, knowing that her father was bigger than any of them. “Hey, daddy…” she said quietly.

Her mother interrupted their moment, playing the ever-prepared hostess. “Are you hungry, dear? Though I daresay you need to get some sleep first. You look like you’re about to drop where you are. ”

“I am tired. I couldn’t get any sleep on the nine-hour flight.”

“Well, let me take you to your room. We haven’t changed it since you left. And after you have slept to your heart’s content, we can have a talk in the morning over breakfast.” Her mother suggested, wrapping an arm around Ella’s shoulder and steering her in the direction of her old bedroom.

Ella was grateful for the comfort her mother provided. “Thanks Mom.”

They stopped at the all-too-familiar door to Ella’s room. The carved wood sign saying “Ella” still hung there, given to her by her father on her ninth birthday. She pushed the door open to reveal her very pink room. True to her mother’s word, the room had been left untouched, a silent tribute to the goings on of three years ago. As her mom flipped the light switch, she noticed that everything that was left out as she was packing was exactly how she remembered it, including the cell phone on her vanity which she forgot to bring with her in her haste to catch her plane.

Opening and rummaging through the closet, her mother pulled out a pair of flannel pajama pants and a small t-shirt. “It looks like all your old clothes will still fit you. You can wear these to bed.” She stopped, realizing what she was saying, “Of course, it’s your room and you probably know more about your clothes than I do. I’ll leave you to it.” She handed the pajamas to Ella and hurried back to the door. “In the morning I’ll drop by the grocery store and pick up a toothbrush and some other things for you. In the meantime, get some sleep.” Her mom backed out of the room as she closed the door. “Good to have you back, sweetheat.”

The doorknob turned with a click and Ella could hear her softly padding back down the hall, whispering something to Harold on the way back to their own bedroom. Most likely they both were rather suspicious of the sudden reappearance of their daughter, especially when she showed up at night carrying nothing else but her purse and a lame excuse as to why she was there.

Ella sighed and tentatively sat on her old bed, feeling as if touching anything in the room would stir up the past. She shrugged out of her jacket and proceeded to undress, happy to throw the dirty articles of clothing onto the floor. She slipped on the blue flannel, noting that they had gotten a tad smaller, but as she slipped them past her hips it was apparent that she could get away with wearing them without any discomfort.

After the long flight, her skin was feeling grimy from being squished between people on a crowded plane, and a shower was the first thing that popped into her mind as she finished pulling the t-shirt over her head and she collapsed on the cool bedspread. But as soon as the soothing feel of the cotton hit her cheek, she had trouble convincing herself to actually get up and head over to the bathroom. Instead Ella rolled herself over and surveyed the room, spotting objects here and there and reminiscing, something that she had not allowed herself to do for quite some time. She had learned in England that dwelling on such thoughts only led her to become homesick, which in turn reminded her of Reagan.

It just so happened that she stopped on a silver picture frame which rested on the second shelf of her white-painted bookcase. The two faces looked down on her, their smiles suspended in a timeless moment when life was comfortable and the future was unforeseeable. She could remember the warmth of their proximity, how she had tried to push away unbidden thoughts out of her head…

The evening was still light, the July sun hanging on the horizon as if it was willing itself to linger in the sky and provide extra time for those still outdoors to enjoy the warm breezes and the pink skies. The air was filled with the muffled laughter of the beachgoers, their shrieks of delight at the surprising cold of the ocean carried away by the increasing winds.

Somehow, on the crowded beach on the Oregon coast, they had found someone not preoccupied enough to take a picture for them, leaning close together as they patiently waited for the middle aged woman to figure out the buttons on the camera, holding their smiles for as long as their tired cheek muscles could stand it.

“Just take the picture already!” Ella muttered through her teeth, loud enough for only Reagan to hear. “I have half a mind to just take the thing away from her and go off in search of someone else.” She swayed a bit as she lifted a hand to readjust a swimsuit strap which was slowly beginning to creep down her shoulder.

Holding her arm to steady her, Reagan leaned closer to her, nodding to the woman politely to throw her off the scent that they were talking about her. “By the time we find someone else, it might be too dark. The sun’s already setting, and I want a picture… Yes, push that button there. No, you have to hold it down.” He directed the last sentence to the woman, who had finally centered them in the picture and was fumbling for the button that would take the snapshot.

“Say cheese!” She said enthusiastically.

“Cheese!” The two college students echoed back, refraining from rolling their eyes at the cliché term while they grinned at the lenses, hearing the tell-tale click and whir signaling that the picture had been taken.

Handing the camera back to Reagan with a triumphant smile on her face, the woman tilted her head and looked at the two with a michievious twinkle in her eye. “You two certainly make a good couple. So adorable…”

Ella blushed and Reagan’s eyes grew wide as he wound the camera. “Oh, we’re just friends.” He admitted, looking as if he wanted to change the subject.

Ella felt a strange tug in her gut, not being able to identify it at the time but now, as she reflected, she was certain that she was feeling longing at the idea of being a couple with Reagan. She had realized that she had slowly developed a crush on him in the last year or so, but knew instantly upon recognizing it that only expressing her feelings to him would jeopardize their relationship. His reaction to the old woman was proof enough that he wasn’t ready to reciprocate.

Thanking the woman and heading back to their spot where they had stashed their towels and bags, Reagan leisurely slung an arm around Ella, pulling her close in a brotherly hug. “Aah, our last summer as college students, Ella.” He took a deep breath, watching the sky turning colors as the sun decided to drop below the water. “I’m so glad that we were able to take this road trip, even if it is only for the weekend. Just think, by next summer, we’ll be starting our official careers, me as a teacher and you as a… well, whatever you decide to do with that degree of yours.”

Ella shrugged under the warm weight of his arm. She resisted the urge to lean in, knowing that what she was thinking was inappropriate. He’s my friend, she repeated to herself in her head. She couldn’t ruin everything by falling in love. Despite her mental screaming, she couldn’t help but notice his soft hand on her shoulder, the gentleness of his embrace… Don’t fall in love!

Back in the future, eyes glazed over with memory, Ella remembered how she had felt, how she fought was she was feeling, how she had been fighting ever since. It had seemed unfair to her then that she suffered as their friendship continued, knowing that the one person whom she cared about more than anyone else in the world was standing right beside her, not returning her feelings. But now it seemed that everything she thought was true three years ago was turned on its head, and the secrets that they both had tried to ignore for so long were out in the open. There was no reason to fight anymore. What she wanted, and she was sure it was what Reagan wanted as well, was free for the taking, if only she would take it.

The fear suddenly gone, she fumbled over the side of the bed for the phone which she vaguely remembered being there. Her fingers grazed the handle and finding her grip, she picked it up without hesitation. Cradling the receiver between her head and shoulder, she squinted at the palm of her hand, where the phone numbers that Reagan had written there had already started to smudge slightly from the sweat of her hand. Using her other free hand, she dialed the correct number, collapsing on the bed. She was still unable to believe that this was all happening in one evening.

The phone dialed once, and she was taken off guard when he picked up only after one ring. She could almost hear the smirk in Reagan’s voice over the line. “I had a feeling you would call so soon.” Obviously he had recognized her last name on the Caller ID and so was able to come up with such a quirky greeting.

She laughed lightly. “Hey…” She trailed off, suddenly realizing that she was unsure of how she was going to say what she wanted. She was so determined to take advantage of the opportunity that was offered her that she didn’t even think of what to say before she dialed his number. She was aware of the silence that was starting to stretch, so she decided to sarifice her pride and be blunt. “Reagan?” She said in a quiet voice.

Sensing that she was about to say something serious, he matched her falsely calm tone. “Yes?”

“Look, I know that a lot has happened. Things have been left unsaid and for all these years, we have been presuming things that aren’t true, and…” She stopped, figuring out how to finish the rest of her sentence.

Reagan waited patiently. “Yes?”

“Can we…” She hesitated, but after swallowing the lump in her throat, she found her courage reappear. “Can we just forget that these three years haven’t happened? What do you say to starting over?”

There was a long pause, which only served to increase the anxiety already bubbling up in her. She was playing with the phone cord with fidgety fingers when she finally heard his reply.

“Ella,” He said enthusiastically, “I would love to.”

THE END