Hesitation

I feel the icy breeze hit my skin
I don't know why it's utterly cold
I had felt the same breeze a lot of times
I wonder why it feels different right now?

It was never easy for me
I tried so hard to fight
I sold my soul and life
I can't believe I ended up in defeat.

To see you leave wasn't my dream
But I know, you had to
I hug myself from the freezing cold
You used to be the one giving me warmth.

I'm in confusion if you'll ever return
Is it wrong to have hope for us?
Realization shines like the sun--
Was your heart ever mine?

I always stroke you silky hair
And you'd whisper endless muted words
No one can ever make me smile like you do
But, have you ever showed me your real smile?

They wanted to take you away
I fought back to keep you
Did you ever hold back tightly?
Or did you just let my hands go?

I see the dark sky above
I just want to scream out loud
Pain, angerm fear, disgust and tears
Where are you to hold me now?

I feel so lost and dismantled
People I trust continue to betray me
I can't believe you'd join them
I wish I'd find the strength to breathe.

Nothing can ever take back time
Of the days we wasted endlessly
We thought tommorow would be there
Now, I ask, will there be any for us?

I long wanted to make you accept
That I'm just a person like you
Full of mistakes and bare flaws
Tell me now, are we nothing but illusions?

The rain has stopped falling yesterday
Even though the road is still muddy,
I think it's the best time to go home
So now, don't hesitate and take my hands in yours.

9,December 2003

-*-*-*-

To return, copy and paste this in your browser: .com

Or if you wish to read another, chose in the drop-down menu from the upper right corner of this page.