*Scene IV*

[Scene opens with restaurant setting. Trixie and Tom are at one table, Tom is taking a break from working at the moment, Watson and Merdock at another, and finally the Narrator is sitting at the last table. There is one empty table for the 2 Security, but they enter later.]

Narrator: Merdock and Watson arrive at the restaurant to meet Tom and Trixie and to scout for shady characters…

Merdock: Watson do those two people look shady?

Watson: No, Merdock.

Merdock: How about…those people? [Waiter comes by and drops Merdock’s fork. Waiter mumbles apologies.]

Watson: No, Merdock! [Louder.]

Merdock: It’s so hard to find good service these days, anyway…Well, how about…

Watson: [Cutting off Merdock] No, Merdock!!

Merdock: [After a pause, excitedly]Watson, Watson, Watson [shaking him to get him to look], those two people did it! I know it!

Watson: [Irritated, rolling eyes] No, Merdock, that’s our client, Trixie, and her boyfriend, Tom. We’re here to spy on Tom, remember?

Merdock: Oh, right. [Looks around the restaurant uninterested in it all]

Trixie: Oh, Tom, I’m so glad you’re here tonight [Looks at Tom and smiles.]

Tom: Of course I’m here, babe, I work here. Besides, what’s more important than my Trix? [Taking her hand, Merdock is rolling his eyes in disgust]

Trixie: Do you really mean that, Tommy?

Tom: Of course I mean it, I bought you that ring didn’t I? [Merdock mocks Tom saying what a lousy scum he is, but Trixie and Tom are too absorbed with each other to notice him, Watson looks at Merdock sternly]

Trixie: Yes, [Looks at ring shyly] and it’s so beautiful, Tom! I just can’t wait to wear it every morning! [Merdock groans loudly and sticks a finger down his throat, says something about a sap fest, while Watson clubs him to keep quiet]

Tom: [Dropping Trixie’s hand] You mean, you, you take it off? [Horrified at the idea]

Trixie: Well, of course I do. I can’t very well sleep with the thing on. I mean, look at it! [Says it matter-of-factly, surprised at Tom’s reaction.]

Tom: No, I want you to never take it off your hand, NEVER! Now promise me –

Trixie: [Cuts him off] Tom! What has gotten into you? [Merdock mocks him saying in a high voice, yes, Tom, what has gotten into you? Maybe you’re a lousy, stinking THIEF! Watson shushes Merdock to be quiet and quickly writes something down in his notebook]

Tom: [Stops himself, realizing how crazy he sounds and picks her hand up again] Nothing, babe, I’m sorry. I just can’t stand the thought of you losing it. It means so much to me that you wear my ring. [Smiles sweetly at her]

Trixie: Oh, Tom…[The 2 Security "Shady Characters" enter and sit down next to the Narrator who is pretending to be a customer in the restaurant. The 2 Security hold a conversation with the Narrator]

Trixie: [To Merdock and Watson, when she notices the 2 Security] Those are the two men that were following me!

Narrator: Just then, two [coughs] shady characters walk in.

Merdock: Don’t make me come over there! [Looks angrily in Narrator’s direction.]

Narrator: Fine then, how does "opaque" characters grab you? [In a nonchalant tone]

Merdock: That’s it! [Jumps out of his chair, Watson tries to stop him. Makes his way over to the Narrator, but goes too fast. His foot catches on the leg of a chair and he falls, crying out, face down on the floor, right next to Tom’s feet. He’s caused quite a commotion: Everyone’s staring except Watson, who has his face in his hands. Merdock stares at Tom’s shoes for a few moments, which are bright gold (the shoes), then slowly gets up flustered but still pompous, mumbling apologies all around.]

Trixie: Mr. Holmes, are you all right?

Merdock: All right? I’m better than all right, I’m – [Stops short, face becomes thoughtful] Gold shoes [Whispering] Now where have I seen those before…[Pauses] THE NEWSPAPER! [Pulls out clipping in a flourish.]

Watson: The newspaper?

Merdock: He…He has gold shoes! [Points at Tom, but is whispering to Watson] Look! [Goes over to Tom] Now those are some pretty interesting shoes you’re wearing. [Trying to look like he wants to have a conversation]

Tom: Oh, thanks. I got them imported from Italy. [Watson heads towards the table, but is letting Merdock handle this one. 2 Security and Narrator are looking at Merdock curiously and wondering what he’s doing.]

Merdock: Really? Yeah, you know I’ve only seen one other pair like yours in all my years of being a detective. [Pauses] Funny that I saw them in…THIS ARTICLE! [Whips out clipping and slams on table, has look of triumph on face. All customers jump at the racket Merdock is causing]

Tom: [Stares in awe & surprise for few seconds, then gets up from table and runs][Shady Characters stand up and grab Tom.]

Security 1: Stop right there!

Security 2: You’re under arrest, Tom Ato, for the stealing of this diamond! [Points towards Trixie’s ring. Trixie looks at her fingers and tries to hide it behind her back]

Watson: But if he’s guilty then who are you?

Security 1: We’re the security from the Gallery he stole the ring from.

Tom: It wasn’t me, it was my brother, Mots, Mozz Arella. [Security 1 & Security 2 roll their eyes.]

Security 2: We were the ones that discovered him in the first place. And we had heard that the culprit had given the diamond to someone else.

Security 1: When we saw this young woman walking down the street with that diamond we knew we had to follow her.

Security 2: I know we startled you, ma’am, and I apologize.

Trixie: That’s all right, fellows.

Tom: You can’t prove that I’m guilty! [Shouting]

Merdock: [Points at Tom] I just did. [Pauses] Huh, I did it! I solved a crime! I’m a real detective! I RULE! [Sergeant Black and Trainee enter.]

Sergeant Black: Everybody freeze, get down! [Grabs gun. Trainee holds gun upside down. Sergeant corrects Trainee while looking around at the restaurant.]

Security 1: Sergeant, we already have arrested the perpetrator.

Sergeant Black: Well, okay then, keep up the good work. [Exit Sergeant Black and Trainee. Guards take away Tom Ato.]

Trixie: I...I don’t understand. This all happened so fast.

Merdock: Well, I hate to tell ya this, but your boyfriend’s been charged with 3rd Degree murder. He’ll probably be in the slammer for a while. [Puts an arm around Trixie’s shoulders.]

Trixie: [Curious look at Merdock.]

Watson: [Shakes head] You don’t pay me enough for this.

Merdock: Well, how much am I paying you now?

Watson: Nothing.

Merdock: All right, I’ll double it! [Pauses] Watson, get me a calculator, what’s 0 times 2?

Watson: Well, I don’t know, Merdock. But I think it’s your IQ.