Marketers Beware

Sitting down to dinner
Should be a pleasent thing
Not a sound should be heard
Especially not a phone ring.

It's a quiet night
Just me and the dog eating
As I'm about to take a bite
I hear a "bling, bling!"

I get up from the table
Picking up the phone
I hear a voice with a thick accent
And a very sleepy drone.

"Good evening, ma'am. You won a trip."
He says, casting his bait.
But I know better and say
"Not this time mate."

He completely ignores me
And continues on his speel
I shake my head and roll my eyes
While my stomach does cartwheels.

"If you mortgage your house with us
You will get this free trip."
"No, thanks." Says I.
"I already had a ride on a Goodyear Blimp."

"No more trips for me.
So bon voyage buddy."
But he won't give up
And now he's making me feel cruddy.

"But ma'am.." he studders..
I'm ready to go over there
And blow his brains out for daring
To interupt me and my chocolate eclair.

"I don't like telemarketers
They get under my skin.
So you'd better leave me alone
Or I'll be calling your next of kin."

Yelling all that in his ear
Must have been too much for the guy
For the next words out of his mouth
Were my favorite: "Bye, bye"

But before he hangs up
I give him a little tip
"Get another job, you bum
And you won't get much lip."

I put the phone down
Feeling much better
With a contented sigh I say
"I love it when a plan comes together!"