Waiting.
Watching everyone else,
Feeling pressure to do it too.
To feel the hype and the excitement.
To feel it run through my veins
And my heart beat faster
The ultimate high.
Should wait for it to come to me,
But I rush into too much.
And feel nothing.
Waiting,
Watching everyone else enjoy the ride.
Watch them do it and smile.
Why can't I feel that too?
Maybe if I keep looking for it,
I'll eventually find it.
I want to sense it in me.
For someone to see it in my eyes
And be concerned.
Waiting,
Watching everyone else.
And I try to be like them.
Give off the signal, falsely.
Make everyone believe I'm just like them.
They don't know that I'm deprived.
Have never felt that true bliss.
That I bawl at the sheer thought of them and their ecstasy.
Praying to experience.
Waiting.
Watching everyone else
Fall in love.