Sitting in my gov. class,
My peers a boistrous crowd.
I try to call the teacher,
But these assholes are too loud.
And my teacher is a fencepost--
Just as tall and twice as thick.
I need to give him something--
I want to scream and kick!

If he doesn't see my hand waving wildly,
If he walks by again and just ignores me,
To get his attention--there's one thing I could do,
Yes, if all else fails, there's always my shoe....

Standing in a long line
That's moving like a snail.
I need to use the bathroom,
But I gotta get this mailed.
And now it's finally my turn,
So the teller takes a walk.
I'm waiting for some postage,
But she has to go and talk.

If she doesn't come, I think that I'll just cry,
'Cause waiting in this line's made my day fly by.
I will flag her down, whate'er it takes, I'll do,
And if all else fails, there's always my shoe....

I'm waiting for some guidance
For my schedule next year.
I'm missing half of lunch, now,
Because the crowd's too big in here.
I signed in on their log sheet
Fifteen minutes ago.
And now the bell is ringing,
'Cause these folks are too damn slow.

If the secretary-lady skips my name again,
I think I'm gonna curse them all, scream aloud and then,
I'm gonna just go postal on 'em, and I'll walk out, too,
And if all else fails, there's always my shoe,
Yes, I can always reap my revenge with my shoe....