|Yes, Virginia, George Bush is STILL The President!
Author: Admiral PM
If you're a Bushie and you know it, clap your hands! Your guy is back in the White House!Rated: Fiction K - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,047 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 11-28-04 - Published: 11-11-04 - id: 1758716
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Once again, I didn't think I'd have to do a chapter two to this, But I had to do a review response installment because the reviews are getting too funny. Let's start right off:
John Stein: "Admiral, the first line of unreason's review is like gold. You should include it in your profile. I already have."
Nope! Marco's first paragraph is much more entertaining, which is why I'm gonna start with him. But thanks for the suggestion. (Oh, and FYI John, a couple of those quotes you have on your author page listed as "Anonymous" aren't. Shoot me an email and I'll explain.)
Okay, now on to Marco:
Marco: Polo! (Just Kidding!)
"You had the White House the last four years, and then from 1980-1992 you had it. From '68 to '76 you had it. Prior to 1960, I can't remember very well, but there was Eisenhower in that timespan. Anyway, my point is made. Boston didn't win a World Series for 86 years. And I thought Republicans were good at math. I guess they fall on their faces when it comes to analogies."
While you, Marco, demonstrate that, as usual, the Left is a little light on History and Civics, because you made the typical mistake of using election years to mark presidential terms. For those of you who don't speak "Educated with Social Studies", Marco's supposed "point" is that because Republicans have held the White House six times since the Fifties (Eisenhower from '53-'61, Nixon from '69-'75, Ford from '75-'77, Reagan from '81-'89, Bush (41) from '89-'93 and Bush (43) from 2001-2005 (His first term ends the same day in January when he takes the Oath of Office for his second term)) supporters of George W. Bush have no right to celebrate Dubya's re-election. After all, since Republicans have dominated the Executive Branch for the past half-century, it would have been a much more praiseworthy victory if Kerry had pulled off an upset.
He's essentially using the same analogy as the one I used in the first chapter, only from the perspective of a Bosox fan (or any Yankee detractor in general). "Boston didn't win a series for 86 years" means that the Bosox' win this year is much more meaningful than a Yankee win would have been, because for the Yankees winning the Series is almost routine. And nobody wants to celebrate a meaningless victory, right?
Well let's look at that: I've lived in New York all of my life, and I've seen a few Yankees World Series Victories in my lifetime, and while a lot of things about them are memorable, the one thing I don't remember about any of them was a Yankees fan not celebrating. Yankees win the Series, Yankees fans celebrate. Happens every time. Been that way all through that 86 years Marco was talking about. If the Yanks won it every year from now till Judgment Day, Yankees fans would celebrate. In fact, the only people in New York that I've ever seen not celebrate a Yankees World Series Victory were all Mets fans. Older Yanks fans may have witnessed (Brooklyn) Dodgers and (NY Baseball) Giants fans not celebrate, but, as Marco said, the point is made.
So if I, as a Yankee fan, can join my fellow Yankee fans in finding enough meaning in those "routine" World Series wins to celebrate them, then it's easy for me to do the same with Bush's victory. In fact, Marco's review has given me even greater cause to celebrate. Why? Because in the context of the Republican victories he considers routine, here's what my man actually did:
-He improved the Republicans' record in Presidential Contests (They're now 9-5 over the past 50 years) and "Time of Possession" of the White House. (36 years - 28 years since 1952)
-He started another Presidential win streak (2-0 since 2000)
-He's helped improve the Party's overall record (3-0 since 2000 in terms of control of Congress, the White House and Governorships)
-He did this all while winning this election by a greater percentage of the popular vote than every Presidential winner got in the same Half-Century timespan.
All of that means all you've done with the first paragraph of your review, Marco, is allow me to demonstrate in even greater detail why Bushies have the right to turn to you and your ilk and say BOOH-YAH!
And I love this line:
"I have no idea how Karl Rove managed to pull this off, but we need someone like him on our team."
Can't you just feel the subtle dig at the President? You guys are still "misunderestimating" him. Well, let me explain how Karl Rove did it, Marc. Unlike your pals in the Democrat party, he realized that nothing you do behind the scenes means anything if your candidate is useless, because a candidate who contributes nothing to his own party's efforts to get him elected won't win. Karl Rove pulled it off because he was working for the better candidate!
So now Marco offers his assessment of the Dems:
"The Democratic leadership is filled with a bunch of lazy-asses that won't do anything coughMcAuliffecough. I'm hoping for a change in 2005."
Uh, Marco? The next general election's in 2006. I should think you'd want them to get moving just a bit sooner. Like Now, maybe?
And the best part of his whole review is that, after lecturing me on celebrating meaningless victories, he says this:
"Hey, we have Obama."
Yes, you have Obama. We have Congress. And the White House. Watch me quake with dread at the Victory of Obama! (snicker)
And to close, Marco has this to say:
"And if it pisses us off, I agree, great. Maybe it'll start something. We have four years of planning; you have four years of gloating and cheering as the bombs fall. Those who plan beat those who mindlessly celebrate any day of the week."
Who says we don't plan? Stats like the ones I've just quoted don't come from pulling victories out of your "nether-regions", Marco. We can gloat and plan at the same time because we're leading the race. We gloat because we're happy to be getting what we want. We plan to make sure we keep getting it.
Oh, and has logical-unreason got on your case yet for stealing his "as the bombs fall" line? You guys amaze me. It's like you eat Prozac like Tic-Tacs. It's one election. Cowboy up and start working on the next one!
Meanwhile, we'll have more "Review Response" entertainment next chapter.