Inside of me there is a chill.

It wants to hurt

It wants to kill.

Sometimes it's easy to oppress.

Sometimes it's strong

I can't repress.

It hurts to have this chill inside.

I can't obstruct

I can't subside.

I wonder if it's only me.

If chill is mine

And they are free.

I wonder if my chill is shared

Is chill just mine?

Were others' spared?

Mostly, chill is at my core.

It's just a feeling

Yet, somehow more.

But, other times, it is a curse.

All bad thoughts

Start to immerse.

My chill really can be stopped

But some bad habits

Can't be dropped.

Maybe chill wasn't given to me

Maybe it's really

What I choose to be.

The chill is deep inside my soul

But this longing to hurt

Is what makes me whole.