Tomorrow (December 31, 2004) will be the day that my very first pet rat will leave this world. Her name is Sango and she's a white albino.

For the past couple of months, she's been losing control of her front paws and having a hard time moving around the cage. Just recently we noticed that she's been losing a lot of weight. When I first got her, one couldn't feel her spine, and now you can. She keeps bleeding around her eyes and she's got this puss coming out from her body and she can't eat or drink and she falls off of my lap and my bed.

Oh lords, I don't want to lose her, but it's best...for both of us. My only wish now is that her passage is safe. I hope she'll come back to me in spirit form and tell me she's okay, and stay with me as my familiar. But, that's selfish of me, isn't it? All I know is that I love her, and I don't want her to leave. However, cancer and death go hand in hand with each other over a rat's life.

I have agreed with my mom on this one: she needs to be put down, for her sake and mine. She knows I love her, she knows I don't want to do this just for the hell of it, and she knows I don't want her to go. It's best if she does, though. Her pain will end, and I'll--hopefully--get over her eventually.

I know there's nothing you can do to help...but I just wanted you to know...

Rest in Peace, my dear baby Sango…

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Sango—pronounced “sahn-go”