Author: TheOneAndOnlySammy PM
I wrote this about how much I hated this guy, my "chipmunk" and its about brutally killing him, i wrote it a long time ago and it shows oh and by the way i am now best friends with the guy :-D R/RRated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Words: 386 - Reviews: 3 - Published: 01-02-05 - id: 1798168
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
By: Sammy Kay
Chipmunks are so cute… Chipmunks I hate you!
They are so peaceful and small, and then they bite you!
They seem so smart, but wait it just bit its leg in two!
It makes some so blue, but others know they are out to get you!
Now we just catch them and pull them in,
And keep them for our own in a large tin!
If you are hungry here's what to do,
To make your own delicious Chipmunk Chew!
First I take the Chipmunk out of its tin,
I get a pan, heat it, and then throw it in!
After it turns to a golden brown, I take it out,
I then take a sharp knife and I pull its tiny heart out!
I put it back in the pan for just a moment and heat it again,
I promise the fun is just starting to begin!
Now I take the Chipmunk out yet again and I cut off its little head,
And I pull out its little heartstrings and se them as thread!
I put the head in a bowl and grind, grind, grind,
Its insignificant Chipmunk memories will soon be MINE!
Once that fun task is done, I take its little body into my hand,
And I pull out its bones and grind them and put them by squirrel land!
Then I mix it all up in a big bowl and add some little things,
Some water, some chocolate, and some pretty golden rings!
That usually forms dough, if not I pull out another, Chipmunk,
I do the same things all over and hope it works if not I find a skunk!
I then take the dough and through it over a large burning fire,
I sit and I wait to see if I can kill a fishy liar!
I really wish this would hurry; this is not a sloth cake,
Ding, ding, ding, my Chews are done, I hope they are thoroughly baked!
I pull it out, put it in my mouth, oh my gosh what is this horrible dish?
Remind me next time to stick to killing, eating, and frying fish!