The Birth of a Mindreading Shapeshiftering Assasin Type: Tabari's Origins (sort of)

Or

Huzzah! Bloopers! And other silly things I do to get past writers block.

We enter the scene some time in 2003, when Pegasus Rider Chronicles was being written. (was once posted but people stopped reviewing and thus the story was taken down)

Lisette: H'Okay. So I want a familiar creature for a demon lord…this is the first part of his story. He will be a shape-shifter and a really cool tormented assassin type. And his name shall be…Sitari! No… no it won’t. His name shall be… Sebastian! No. Guiseppi! No…Mooshoo?

(falls into silence as ball of clay takes its own shape and then crawls onto the shoulder of its creator.)

Unnamed being: What are you thinking, Lisette?

Lisette: What to name this thing I made.

Unnamed being: What is it?

Lisette: I don’t know… too soon to tell. I was thinking a shape shifter but now I think it …maybe it shifts because of the lord demon’s spell.

Unnamed being: What’s the lord demon’s name?

Lisette: (growing annoyed) I don’t know. I’ll probably end up naming him after a town in Pennsylvania.

Unnamed being: What is the new thing’s name?

Lisette: (more annoyed) I don’t know.

Unnamed being: You don’t know a lot.

Lisette: (snarling a mass of syllables) Tabari! Go away. Hey, wait a sec… He will be a shape-shifter and a really cool tormented assassin type and his name shall be… Tabari. And he shall be my Tabari!

Tabari: Yay! I’ve been born! What am I?

Lisette: A dark, angsty shape shifter and a really cool tormented assassin-type guy for the Pegasus Rider chronicles.

Tabari: Huzzah!

Lisette: Why are you smiling? There is no smiling in really cool tormented assassin types…

Tabari: Because… I have been born. I am happy. I must smile.

Lisette: we’ll have to work on that happy business.

Later

Lisette: so then the Pegasus rider chick goes into Philia and is the victim off an Ambushscade…

Tabari: (climbs onto the shoulder of his creator) What are you thinking?

Lisette: Go away, T-man. I’m working on the Pegasus Rider.

Tabari: Why?

Lisette: because I want to finish her story.

Tabari: why?

Lisette: So I can post it on Fiction Press.

Tabari: Why?

Lisette: Go away, Tabari.

Tabari: My stories more interesting.

Lisette: You’re back plot, T-man.

Tabari: That’s not my fault. pouts I’m to interesting to be a back plot. I demand recognition.

Lisette: Too bad.

Tabari: (pouts in the corner) That’s not cool.

Lisette: That’s right. Go cultivate angst. It will make you evil by the time you enter the narrative.

later still

Tabari: Hey Lisette, what are you thinking?

Lisette: Why do you always ask that?

Tabari: Don’t know; feels right. Guess what, I got a story for you!

Lisette: You damned backplots are always coming up to me with stories.

Tabari: No! Mine’s really good. Just a little addition.

Lisette: I have enough with Reese and Migaldi, and Danaiad and Lucerne.

Tabari: But it’s gooooood.

Lisette: Okay. I’m pretending to listen.

Tabari: Okay. Enter Migaldi and I into competition for head assassin, but we have to work together against the P.R. That way as he falls in love with her he has more to lose.

Lisette: oh… I do like that.

Tabari: Then make me an advisor to Lucerne so I can help him trick the princess.

Lisette: You’d have to be really smart for that.

Tabari: Make me snake-like and cunning.

Lisette: Cool.

Tabari: and then make me a sympathetic character by creating a very vulnerable wife that I am doing this all for.

Lisette: It’s amazing how fast I lost interest in your story.

Tabari: no listen! It’s really good. Develop me as a totally dark thing and then have me sitting next to a fire wounded after a storm, you know in that section where everything and everybody is beating me up, and then have me looking at her picture and feeling really sad.

Lisette: Oh shit, that’s delicious…I might… maybe…okay.

Sure that was late, but later still (after Tabari has engulfed half of the Pegasus rider’s story)

Tabari: What are you thinking?

Lisette: No one is reviewing. I blame you. Too many plots. Not enough to keep readers.

Tabari: I’m sorry. But the story was really good and dark and angsty… the chick getting stuck in the sunlight and left to die and all that.

Lisette: I have to re-work the entire story with you as an equal character to Reese. We’ll tug the readers both ways. In a hero quest adventure. Only yours is inverted because you lose.

Tabari: Damnation.

Lisette: Yeah… rework the whole story.

(Lisette tears story off fictionpress and Tabari grins wickedly as other characters cry for mercy.)

Tabari: if you’re going to re-work the entire story… I have a few minor suggestions…and a great prologue slash story. All you have to do is play around with Reese’s gender…

Later (while working on Dreams Unpursued)

Tabari: What are you thinking, Lisette?

Lisette: Go away, character. You are cute and adorable.

Tabari: So?

Lisette: Your supposed to be angsty and dark!

Tabari: oh yeah… that.

Lisette: You’ve convinced me to create and entirely new story centered around you and your love affair with these two bozos (points to David who is playing with his lips like an infant and Molech who is hitting David with a rubber bat and giggling cherubically) who can only act right when I make them fuck you. (both stand at attention anf grin) and now you can’t even be convincingly angsty. No you have to be cute and like Chinese… or Italian… or Greek, or whatever the fuck it was. Grrr… I hate characters. I’m gonna go work on the train sex thing K wanted.

Tabari: I’ve got an idea for that too…

Earlier: much much earlier but not remembered until now

Tabari: What are you thinking, Lisette?

Lisette: meh… researching incubus.

Tabari: what? The band?

Lisette: naw… it’s a species of demon that has sex with women and gives them nightmares. Sounds kinda fun to play around with.

Tabari: slashy… Hey, there’s an idea.

Lisette: hum? Ooo.. there’s a female version, sweet.

Tabari: Say what if that chick I was telling you about… what if I was an incubus and I did that to her?

Lisette: (puts her hand on Tabari’s shoulder) Thou shalt be my shape-shifting incubus and I shalt called thee Tabari, the darkly shrouded, and thou shalt ravage the world with thine evil ways and misguided lusts.

Tabari: sinisterly smiles, teeth now sharp dark eyes glinted with lust I love this story.

Lastly

Tabari: What are you thinking, Lisette?

Lisette: I’m going to give you the ability to read peoples minds so you stop asking that.

To the reviewers:

(distributes stars)

To the eagle flying over the molehill person... Half-cookie! For only reveiwing the last chapter. Other half for bringing up a good point. His name is actually pronounced Mul - leck. But I didn't want to spell it that way because it's too close to Mullet. I was worried that people were goning to call him Moo lick ifI spelled it 'Mooleck'. David was actually supposed to be said with a long 'a' and an emphasis on the 'v', but there was something too cheesy, sci-fi, ghettoishabout DaVid.

Eyahnah gets a star because I think the name is just someone randomly typing, but she/he/it mentioned Zeus and loves me. puts on plastic coat and hugs back Just wait for the next story! (dances) Sweee! I have maturity as a writer!

Flavian Earth – the reviewer formerly known as Gab Falcon - gets a star and a cookie if it gets to this page, and then another cookie because… it deserves it. But you have to tell me what I left out! I don't like loose ends!

Esquirella does not get a star unless she is squirrel (which is likely but if she’s not Squirrel gets a star instead) in which case she gets a star and a cookie for reaching here and an extra cookie for pointing out that female incubi are succubi. I did know that, (root word of the word succumb) I just didn’t want to confuse anyone… well, not with a minor detail anyway.

Balk gets his imaginary beard shaved because he stopped reviewing.

K. gets nothing because I give her too many cookies.

Cookie Gestapo steals everyone’s cookies and stars, firstly, because s/he/it is the Cookie Gestapo and all your cookies belong in a sugar concentration camp to become healthy and de-carbed, and secondly, because The Great CG’s reviews are fucking awesome and very amusing and made me feel really good! I originally had Tabari not killing David; but then I changed my mind and tucked in a scene with Tabari tearing him up, but now David dies in a very apropos way with an assasination style that I had Tabari using before but had forgotten until that reveiw. Thank you, Oh Gestapo-er of the cookies!

Shameless plugging.

So this is really a three part story. First we have Tabari (because he older... about 25 some years so) and then we have Rease's story. Then we have the main story where I've made them equal characters and they're pitted against eachother. Promises to be really good. But I have to get Rease's side up first to see if I have interest. It will soon be posted under the title "Confessions of Weakness", and there's stuff in that story that I have never attempted to do in homosexual erotica before. Stay tuned to see if you like it!

Or, just go read everything else I have posted. That'll work too. :-)

Oh yeah. I also wanted to direct everyone's attention to the story called "Blood-stained Silk Shirts" which is a little something I've been working on. I'm thinking of developing it into a full-figured story 'stead ofthe little flirt that it is now, but I was hoping people would give me ideas about where they could see the story going: just to amuse meand inspire it in some direction. Thanks. I'll go away now. (Gives more cookies to all and cackles insideously)