Death

By: Darth Sakura

I want death, and I want it now.

How bizarre is my desire for something that I cannot have, a feeling too human even for me? The gift of being immortal would have been so overwhelming to their weak souls that even the sanest person would be enveloped in a violent sea of madness in mere seconds.

It is my misfortune to never face death.

My body might never die, but my feelings, emotions and soul have died a long time ago when he died. I am an immortal; a being that must endure the anguish of always watching humans have their moments of life. Then, they pass away to that sweet oblivion of peace, quiet and eternal rest.

I want eternal rest; my heart beats for that solemnly purpose.

It is a cruel fate to be created with a human soul, and to be able to love and hurt. Those overwhelming emotions can take over their minds, and make them do the stupidest things, like slaves controlled by their destiny. A soul can hurt with eyes of colorless flames and heal with whispers of a smooth touch. An essence with such magic can be articulated with tears of rain, and smiles of blossom flesh flowers.

Yes, I was cursed with the most evil torture a soul can have, to never be able to love.

Humans are creatures which can never pleased, and always want more and more. They do not know what they have in their hands -- what I crave to possess. They are ignorant to what world they live in. We, creatures of the dawn, want nothing more than to make them bleed in desire and choke them in divine bliss, with all the feral and savage jealousy that runs through our veins.

Let me close my eyes for the first and last time.

I cannot go on like this. Everything now is such a dull gray at night. The stars that cover the mystifying sky do not shine for me anymore. My home is not as dark as it once was, and my heart still pounds echoes inside my fragile and lost mentality.

Unmerciful Artemisa, why did you create me with eyes full of revenge and hands of hate? You love to make me suffer so? I have given everything to you, and have done everything you wanted. I just want that peaceful rest which my heart throbs for; to not regret each day, year, and century, and free myself from the blame his death.

I want to stop feeling, and to stop loving. I want to be back with him, my home.

It is raining again I can feel it in my face.

Dawn is almost here; I must go now. Mother, I bid farewell.

One more night will come, and once again the feelings will suffocate my senses and blind my brain. Once again, I will call death through my breath, only to never fulfill my wish.

I just hope, from the bottom of this damned soul, which shatters with artificial light, to someday, die and be back in his arms, never to wake up again.

But for now, my dearest friend and greatest longing death, I will keep calling you.