Author: Walking Solutions PM
I hate Fairy Tales. Which is why it's just my luck that I'm stuck going through a billion fairy tales. Oh joy. But it gets better. I have to kiss my True Love at the end of each fairy tale. And I just found out my True Love is Phoenix. My worst enemy.Rated: Fiction T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 22,819 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 04-09-08 - Published: 02-02-05 - id: 1823666
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
A/N: Well, this is my new story. I, uh, suppose... I mean, yeah, it is. Don't ask why I said I suppose. Because it fully is. My new story, that is.
I'll just shut up now and let you get to reading it, shall I?
Chapter 1: Fairy Tale Horrors
Tommy Prince, kissed a few there on the lips
She woke him with a cold sore, she ain't so pretty no more
Ah, my fairytale love story
My fairy life
My fairytale love story
To get you off of my..
I got to thinking
I'm not as sweet as them all
My fairytale love story
Ooo, My fairytale love story
Yeah, you're my fairytale love story
Ooo, my fairytale love story
Rapunzel let down your hair, I'll cut it off
- Fairytale Love Story by Alice In Chains
Okay, by the way, this is fully not working. Apparently, this wonderful city that I call home (notice me not really saying it is home, since I am a firm believer of that whole home-is-where-the-heart-is thing, me being the horrible romantic that I am) prides itself in the absolutely smashing way we elves can just visit our monarchs at any time we feel like it, as long as it's in the 1-5 time slot.
Do you want to know what time it is? Yes, that's it. 3:36. Meaning I have full rights to be going to see the Monarchs. I mean, come on, just one of the monarchs, please. Even the 10-year-old Prince would be fine with me, okay? I just want to see a bloody monarch! Someone who can do something! Something useful! Because, frankly, nobody else can do anything. Everyone I plead my case to is all like, "Go see the Monarchs."
It's like trying to see the fairies, which is, like, impossible, being as they hate us and we hate them, so no way in fairy butt would they let any of us into their precious lands.
"Can you please just let me in?" I plead with the guard at the door to the Royal Palace.
"I'm sorry, but all the Monarchs are busy at the moment," the guard informs me.
"I could wait in the Entrance Hall until they're done," I suggest, grinning hopefully.
She rolls her eyes. "Nope. They aren't seeing anybody. They'll be busy the rest of the day."
I groan in frustration and fight the urge to go back to my younger years and stamp my foot in frustration (shut up. I am fully aware that I just stamped my foot at my mother yesterday. Can we please just forget about that little incident for a bit?). "There must be a way that I can see them. Just one of them. Even Prince Gabriel. Someone who has the power to help me."
The guard's will seemed to be breaking. Ha! Mwa ha! Mwa ha ha! I am soooo good! I swear, you should just bow down to me or something.
"I can't help you," the guard finally said.
Okay, so maybe I'm not as good as I thought. Whatever.
Don't talk to me. I need to go and sulk.
"But, you know," the guard continues, "I always find the East Garden a relaxing place to think of where I could find a monarch."
I manage not to look at her weirdly…but only just. "Um…okay."
And I walk away, disappointed.
Alright, so I went to the East Garden. Please. Can you blame me? What else was I supposed to do? I mean, if it worked for her, maybe it'll work for me. Maybe the East Garden gives you psychic powers or something. Oh, but, man, what if it's just the specific place she sat? That'd really suck. I should've asked her. Remind me to ask her next time.
Oh, crap, someone's coming. Not that I don't have the right to sit here or anything. I have full rights to sit in the East Garden. It's the Private East Garden that I'm not allowed to sit in. My mom told me, so I know. Mwa ha.
The person who emerges from the bushes looks surprised to see me. Why? There's no reason for this little kid to be surprised to see me. I mean, this garden is public property and all. I can be in here all I want. It's not like it's the Private East Garden or anything. Jeez.
"Excuse me, Lady," the young boy says politely. The kid has manners! What a miracle, I swear. "I beg your pardon, it's just that these Gardens are reserved for the Royals alone. Not that I mind you being here, it's just that the King and Queen would rather not have anyone other than Royals in this Garden."
Um, isn't he in here? And since when is it reserved for the Royals?
"You're in here," I tell him, as if he needed to be informed of that. Oh, shut up, please. "And this is the East Garden."
"Yes, exactly," the boy says. "The Private East Garden."
"No, no, this isn't the Private one. This is the one where anyone can go into," I protest.
"There is only one East Garden, and that is the Private one."
But the Guard…
"But the Guard told me that when she wants to find the Royals, she goes to the East Garden," I tell him.
Ha! Take that!
"Yes," the boy agrees with me. "Certain Guards are allowed to go into the East Garden. But only to find the Royals, not to stay there. I do not think you are one of those Guards. I have never seen you before."
"Do you punish people who go into the East Garden?" I ask cautiously, prepared to run if he says yes.
"No," the boy answers, and I relax. "At least, not the first time. And if the King finds you, he grows very angry and yells at you, which is not a pleasant experience. I've never liked it, anyway. He yells at me all the time."
Who is this boy, anyway? Is he a servant or something? If so, why is he in the Private East Garden? I heard that the Royals never go in here with their servants. Servants aren't allowed. Only Guards, and then, most of the time, they are hidden.
"Who are you?" I ask.
"Oh, beg your pardon, Lady," the boy apologizes, cheeks turning red. "I always forget my manners. I am the Prince Gabriel. It's a pleasure to meet you."
With that, he bows. Not very low, but as low as anyone should bow when respecting their elders.
"Oh!" I exclaim. He's the Prince? Well, of course he is! I'm so dumb! It makes sense, being as he's in the Private East Garden, and is too young to be a Guard, and doesn't have the Guard uniform on beside.
Crap, crap. I have to curtsy now. I hate curtsying. Okay, do you know how hard it is? It's hardest to bow to Royals. We have to put one foot in front of the other, and then bend at the knees until we're practically sitting on our feet, which just makes us more unstable. Then, we have to spread our arms gracefully out to the sides (and I have absolutely zero grace whatsoever), without tipping over. And, to top it all off, we have to bow our heads, at just the right moment. This is what usually makes me fall. It's horrible, I swear.
And, and…I've done it! I've curtsied! Mwa ha! Albeit, not very gracefully - okay, not gracefully at all, and I did wobble a bit, but still.
"Oh, please, don't curtsy to me," the young Prince says. "You're like what, 7, 8 years older than me?"
I look up at him in surprise, and, surprise, surprise, I topple over. Damn.
As the Prince is hurrying to help me up, I say, "But you're the Prince. I'm supposed to bow to you."
Prince Gabriel wrinkles his nose. "But I hate it when people bow to me. None of the kids will play with me at all! How could they, with them bowing to me every second? And when I tell them not to bow, they just get all surprised and look at me like I'm crazy or something, and then go on bowing. And the grown-ups, they just look at me in pity, like I'm some poor little creature who doesn't understand the ways of the world. I do, though! I understand that it's unfair that I can't play with anybody just because of who I was born as! It's not fair! I'm bored all the time. I, I…urgh!"
The Prince stamps his foot and pouts.
I grin at his little outburst. First of all, he is a very smart little kid. Second of all, he's so cute when he pouts like that!
"Aw, come on," I say, trying to be comforting. "I'm sure somebody'll play with you."
The Prince shakes his head sadly. "No one will."
"Well, have you ever tried going to the village in disguise or something like that? Then just don't tell the kids who you are, or make up a name or something," I say.
Prince Gabriel's eyes light up. "You're brilliant! Thanks, thanks!"
How come he's never thought of this before? I mean, it's not that hard to think of. I dunno, maybe royalty just doesn't ever think of dressing up as peasant. Why would they? I never think of dressing up as royalty.
Ah, crap, I'm getting off-track. As in off-track with the Prince. I had planned to immediately plead my case to the first Royal I saw, but then Prince Gabriel has to go and be all, you know, cute and stuff, and then he had to go on that little rant of his, so what if he thinks that I'm just talking to him so he'll listen to my case? That definitely wouldn't be good. Nope, not good at all. This is the most important case in the world. The elf world and the human world. And the fairy world. Of course, anything to do with elves is more important than anything to do with the fairies. The fairies suck. And, okay, maybe that's a bit dumb of me to automatically assume they suck when I haven't met very many fairies, and actually one of the very few I have met is actually really nice, there's one fairy I know that puts a bad name on all fairies. Not that he's really the reason that everyone hates fairies - that happened thousands of years ago, and he's only, like, 19 years old. My point is, because of him I now hate all fairies, while before I hadn't believed anyone when they said fairies were evil, because I have had this fairy friend since I was 3 years old, and she was perfectly nice and not evil what-so-ever. She is the exception, by the way.
Okay, so maybe I don't hate fairies. Maybe I only hate him. But I was trying to sound all dramatic and stuff, although obviously it was wasted on you.
Um, which is precisely what Prince Gabriel is doing. Going away, that is.
"Wait!" I call after him. I start running to reach him. "There's something I must ask you!"
He's already at the entrance of the Garden, and I meet him there.
"Yes?" he asks.
"I was wondering if you could help me with something," I start. "Well, it's not really for me, see, it's for my friend. Except she can't exactly ask herself since, well...you'll see."
Heh. Yeah. She's kind of a fairy.
But I don't mention that little bit of information.
"I'd be happy to help," Gabriel says kindly.
Not after you hear what my case is, you won't
But I don't mention that either.
"Well, see..." I pause, wondering how to go about saying it so that he won't automatically laugh and, I dunno, spit in my face or something. Not that he'd do that. Shut up. "I have this friend, and she wants to marry a nobleman, but she's only a commoner. And so I was wondering if I could get permission from the King and Queen so the two can marry."
I still don't tell him that she is a fairy and he is an elf. Hopefully I won't have to.
Cross my fingers and all that, right?
Gabriel looks confused. Why?
"Why do you need the permission of the King and Queen?" he asks. Oh. Well...fairy poop. "Wouldn't you just need the permission of the parents?"
"That's where the problem lies," I confess. "The parents have no control over whether or not the two can marry. The monarchs of both the Kingdoms must give them their blessings. It's the law, see."
Gabriel is beginning to look suspicious.
I don't think I can get away without telling him who the two are anymore.
That sucks, by the way.
I sigh, a big, long one of defeat, since I have been defeated and am therefore allowed to sigh in defeat.
"The girl's a fairy, and the guy's an elf," I tell him at last. "That's why they need permission from the monarchs. And she can't go before the monarchs, because she's a fairy, and he can't because the monarchs would hate him for wanting to marry a fairy."
So, yes, that's my case. And maybe it isn't the most important case in the world. Maybe it seems a bit insignificant to you, to go through all that fuss.
But it's really important for Europia and Roman, okay? To them it is the most important case in the world. I mean, imagine if they couldn't get married. Imagine how horrible it would be for them, how they would yearn for each other their whole lives and end up marrying another, never really falling out of love with the other...
Ah, the drama, ah, the romance...
I'll shut up now.
Gabriel looks hesitant. No, no, don't look hesitant!
I guess it's a step in the right direction though, right? At least he didn't immediately look at me in disgust and spit at me.
"I would love to let them marry...if it was in my power," Gabriel admits. Meaning his parents won't let them marry. I knew it. "But my parents, they hate fairies with a passion. They wouldn't understand."
Why wouldn't they let her marry him? I really don't get it. It's not like they have to marry a fairy. Oh, no, heaven forbid. Why can't they just let them marry and leave them alone? They won't ever have to hear from them again. It'll be like it never happened, and the monarchs could go on leading their meaningless, stupid lives.
Yeah. I don't really like the monarchs right now.
"Can't you do anything?" I plead. "You're their son. Surely they'd listen to you."
Gabriel shakes his head sadly. "No, the don't ever listen to me."
I groan in frustration. "Isn't there any kind of, I dunno, strings you can pull or something?"
"I'll try, I will," he tells me determinedly. "But, please, don't get your hopes up. I doubt I'll be able to do anything. I don't come into any power until I turn 18 and I gain the thrown. And then, of course, I have to find a bride before I reach 18, or it will go to my little sister."
This is not good. Definitely not good. How can I tell them that, because of me, they won't be able to marry?
Gabriel sees the despair on my face and opens his mouth. "I'm - "
He stops short as a jet of light shoots past him and straight to me. I gasp as the scarlet light hits me and I jerk backwards.
"Oh, no! Oh, no, what have I done!" a small voice exclaims from behind the bushes.
A small girl with short bubblegum pink hair and red eyes runs out from the bushes and to me, wringing her hands nervously, and muttering, "Oh, no, oh, no, this cannot be good."
She looks as if she's only 6 years old, but talks as if she's older. And then...holy fairy, she's a human! How did she get in the Elf world? And how does she have pink hair and red eyes when she's a human? Humans all have the boring hair and eye colors.
"What have you done?" Prince Gabriel demands from beside me.
Jeez, for a little kid, he can be really intimidating. He's starting to frighten me.
Must come with being a Prince.
The girl turns to him, her eyes fearful and her face white. "I...um, well..."
"Speak!" the boy exclaims. "You just hit my friend with a spell! What have you done to her? If you've dealt her any permanent damage, you can be sure I will - "
I'm his friend? How touching.
And, no, I wasn't being sarcastic. So hah.
"Oh, please, Your Highness," the girl interrupts. "It's just that I thought she was the Queen at first glance because she was with you and you're the Prince, but right after I released the spell I realized it wasn't her and the spell, um, wasn't the right one. Please don't throw me in the dungeons or anything, I really meant good, I swear. I'm just not that advance with spells yet. I'm only have elf. The other half is human, so I'm rather bad with spells."
"Is that supposed to make it better?" he asks. "Telling me that it was supposed to be my mother? And then telling me it was the wrong spell? What spell was it?"
He seems so much older when he's angry. It must come with the whole Prince thing, again.
The girl looks even more nervous now. "It was supposed to be a spell of understanding. I learned the spell a little while ago and I thought I'd try it on the monarchs of the Elves and the Fairies so that they'd understand the other race, and then they wouldn't hate each other so much."
I smile at her. I like her, even if she did just charm me or jinx me or curse me or something. I still don't understand how she can talk so well when she's only, like, 6 or whatever.
"I think it sounds like a really good idea," I tell her, trying to comfort her. After all, she was only trying to do something good, right?
"What did the spell turn out to be, though?" Gabriel asks. He seems to have cooled off some.
"It's, um, well it shouldn't harm her, really..." she trailed off. "The spell was supposed to be green, and then it turned out red, so I knew it was, well... I mean, you'd probably like it if you were human, but since you're not, it might not really be to your liking... It's a...well, see...a..."
"Just say it!" Gabriel finally explodes.
The boy obviously doesn't have much patience.
"It's a Fairy Tale Curse," she finally explains in a rush.
Please do not tell me she just said that. Please, oh please, oh please...
A Fairy Tale Curse? I'm not sure what that is, but it cannot be good. I mean, it have Fairy Tale in its name. And Curse at the end.
Let's get one thing straight right now. Elves - and fairies, for that matter - hate fairy tales. We loath them. We spit on them. We curse them...you get the idea. We don't like them, contrary to humans, who absolutely adore them, the weirdoes.
And now she's done some kind of fairy tale weirdness to me?
This cannot be happening.
"What does it do?" I ask, dread coming over me.
She bites her lip. "It, uh, it makes your life into a Fairy Tale."
No way. No. No no no no no no no no no no. No infinity times. Nooooooo. Anything but that. Please!
I take a deep breath. "Explain."
I definitely do not like her anymore.
"The spell was originally used to find your True Love, the one you were born with," the girl begins. "Your life becomes a bunch of different fairy tales, one after the other. In each fairy tale, your True Love is the Prince or the hero or whoever. You have to complete all the events in the fairy tale before the next fairy tale will come. Once you've completed a fairy tale, you must kiss your True Love to prove that the fairy tale is complete. If it is, you go on to the next fairy tale. If not, you have to repeat that fairy tale all over again. The Fairy Tale Curse ends once...well, um...heh heh..."
She cannot be serious. As in no way. As in...
And why won't she say what ends the curse? Why, why, why?
I'm panicking, I know. But wouldn't you be panicking too?
My life as I know it is dead. I don't even want to know my stupid True Love! I want to decide who my True Love is on my own. I hate fate.
"As soon as what?" I finally lose my patience.
She takes a deep breath and avoids my eyes as she says, "As soon as you tell your True Love that you're in love with him. And then he has to be in love with you back and he has to tell you that he's in love with you too. If he isn't in love with you, you'll have to repeat all the fairy tales you did over again, and you can't tell each other that you love the other until the point where you left off. So you're risking a lot if you tell him that you're in love with him. He can't tell you he's in love with you first, either, or send any secret signals or something. You can't fool the curse. People have tried before. The Curse always knows. And then, after the Curse is complete, you must...you must marry him."
I struggle not to scream. So that's my life now? My life has just been laid before my eyes. I will go through a bunch of stupid fairy tales, most likely repeating them over and over again because how can I get anyone to fall in love with me, and then, when I finally get done, I have to marry him. I don't want to get married! I'm not ready, okay? I'm only 17. I have my whole life ahead of me.
And then, of course, I don't even get to pick the guy who I marry. It's an arranged marriages, basically. Even if the guy's supposed to be my True Love, what if I don't like him? What if he's an asshole? Just because he's my True Love doesn't mean he'll be a nice, good person. This guy was picked for me before we were born, before anyone knew what his personality was.
I will kill whatever stupid deity thought of the absolutely stupid idea of True stupid Loves.
"I'm so, so, so sorry," the girl apologizes, her eyes welling up with tears. My heart twinges a little. I've always had such a soft spot with children. "I never meant for this to happen."
"I know," I say. "Listen, it's not your fault. Well, it kind of is, really, but everything will be fine. I mean, what if, when the time comes, I'm ready for marriage? And I'm sure my True Love will be great. I could never fall in love with someone I hated, right?"
I doubt I'll be ready for marriage. I doubt my True Love will be great. And I don't have to like my True Love for him to be my True Love.
I don't say this aloud. That would be mean, and she's already on the verge of tears.
The girl looks up at me hopefully. "You really think so?"
I bend down to her and smile. "Of course I do."
"Hey, um..." Gabriel pauses and then looks sheepishly at me. "What's your name?"
Oh, right. I never told him, did I? Never told you, either, for that matter.
"It's Whisper Silver Rose," I answer. "You can just call me Whisper, though. Or, you know, Whisp for short or something, though I'd really rather you didn't."
My name may seem strange for humans, but it's perfectly normal for elves. For elves and fairies, pretty much any names but Jen or Heather or Jessica is acceptable. Jen and Heather and Jessica are human names. Human names are big no-no's, elves hating humans and all.
Which makes it weird that the girl is half elf and half human, but I won't ask.
"Okay," the Prince says. "I just wanted to tell you, Whisper, that I'll do everything I can for your friend while you're doing your...fairy tale things. I swear, I'll get my parents to give their blessings or die trying."
I nod at him, grinning. The grin comes out as more of a grimace, though. I've never been good at grinning when I'm not happy. It just doesn't feel right, you know?
"So, what's your name?" I ask the girl.
"Aurora Gold Night," the girl answers. Ah, so her parents kept the tradition that elves have of putting a color as their middle name.
I nod, not knowing what to say.
"When does the Curse start?" I finally ask.
"Midnight," she answers.
How fitting. If the first fairy tale isn't Cinderella, well, then, shoot me and call me a fairy.
Don't, though, because I'd rather not be a fairy and I'd rather not be shot.
And I know that it seems as though I shouldn't know any fairy tales, being as I hate them so much, but everyone still knows the fairy tales. How could we not? We're curious when we're younger as to why the fairy tales, well, suck butt, so we ask about them, and we're told the fairy tales.
Fairy tales suck, have I mentioned that?
I bite my lip and stand up.
"Well. Midnight." I pause. "I suppose I'll go say goodbye to my family. In a sense, I guess, they will be gone, right? Because even though they'll still be in my life, they'll have different personalities and they'll have different roles in my life, right?"
I sigh. This sucks. I think I've said that already, but I really don't care.
This sucks more than you can possibly imagine.
"Goodbye, then," I say to Gabriel and Aurora.
They say goodbye as well, and I walk away.
I hope midnight never comes.
A/N: Did you like it? If you didn't, well, then, that's too bad for you. You thought you'd get a good story and you didn't. Tear, tear.
And if you did, all the more joy to the world. And me. Fun fun ('till my daddy took my T-Bird away).
Sorry, couldn't resist. Everything reminds me of everything.
Review, please. I like reviews just as much as the next writer. More so, really since I'm, um...you know, special like that.
Oh, yes, and you-know-who in the next chapter! Yay! And if you don't know who, go back and read the summery.
Phoenix, her worst enemy, her True Love, for those lazy forgetful people out there. I mourn with all those lazy forgetful type. I, too, am one. Alas, alas.
I shouldn't tell you, my readers, that I'm lazy and forgetful. I doubt it will put much confidence in my updating on time abilities. But I'll try, I swear! This is my new favorite story. I have lots of ideas for it. Lots and lots. I shall never get Writer's Block (knock on wood, cross my fingers, all that).