Complicated Acceptance

Why are you ignoring me

When I try to speak to you?

I almost never talk out loud,

So one would think

You would want to listen

When words do come out.

But it seems like you do not,

So why should I even try

To communicate with all of you?

All you do is look down upon me.

All I do is fear your rejection.

I hate you all;

Yet I still want to be accepted.

I hate your ways

And your outlook on life;

Yet I envy your simplicity

And your ability to always

Be so optimistic.

For I ,myself, seem to make all thinks

Far more complicated

Than they are in truth;

And I always seem to see everything

With a pessimistic view.

I always talk of

You humans being so complicated

And every time I do, I wonder to myself:

Am I being truthful or

Am I just being pessimistic once more?

And with all these thoughts

Going through my head,

It is no wonder I look

So angry to you.

I wish I were happier;

Yet I do not want to become naive.

For I feel that some of the happiest people

Are among the most naive.

And I also feel that giving up my beliefs

Is not worth all the happiness

One can obtain.

I know that I, myself, can be,

Indeed, very naive;

But still I refuse to give in

To all your so-called happiness.

So yes, I an annoyed

And yes, I am naive;

But these are just two of the many things

That makes me who I am.

And I refuse to give up any of them.

For, though, at times I hate who I have become

I also cherish it deeply…