The gay waiter.

For my 21st birthday

my friends gave me a gay waiter.

His name was Robert.

He was tall and slender

With sculpted arms and legs.

He pranced up to our table at Bennigans

like he’d stepped straight off the set of “Queer eye for the straight guy”

and announced to me

that he was mine for the evening.

When he offered me a drink

my roommates wasted no time

as they pulled out the list they’d compiled.

Sex on the beach Screaming orgasm Redheaded slut

I had to choose one of them.

“You should order a blowjob, “declared Courtney.

I felt the crimson embarrassment

rising in my cheeks.

“So, what’ll it be, Honey?” Robert asked.

I don’t think he heard

my shy request

for sex on the beach.

“One blowjob coming up!” he laughed.

I felt like a kid bobbing for apples

as I lowered my mouth over the shot glass.

No hands of course.

That was the whole point.

I didn’t have to take the shot

from between Robert’s legs

as was customary

Yet I couldn’t help imagining

the feel of slipping the glass

from between his firm thighs.

He leaned in

and seductively wiped

a dab of whipped cream from my lip.

I breathed in his smell

soap and aftershave.

When he slid into the booth for a brief chat

I couldn’t resist.

I wrapped my arms around him

and declared that he was the best birthday present I’d ever gotten.