The phone is ringing off the hook;

that boy again

grooving

and exhaling

on the with drawl of my sway.

The radio's on

and songs

attach themselves to my eyes

setting the mood

for his ringing.

I want to be alone

in the silence

to deny me

by obliging me

somberly.

The phone is a blur

like winter outside my window.

The chill

of his wanting

becomes a child of satisfaction

inside my belly.

My body is an empire of mahogany

sweetly smooth

solid

carrying me all the way

that I chose to go.

The silence flickers

maybe he'll get it

grow tired

of this need-

I can see the recognition scratching at his brow like an early mosquito bite

tiring

of the big band love songs that he wants to hum

into my ears

as I sleep.

Night is enormous

undiminished

and unrecognizable.

My white skin

is turning to blue

lost

within

the

silence

of his noise.

This ringing becomes ecstasy

weeks of winter

crawling into my mouth

breathing breathe

with it brings.

I see him sweating it out

knowing that

I can hand over this empire

gently

or harshly

riding high

on his surrender

I turn to look but think better of it.

I can already hear

promises on his lips;

promises of lies

about everything

tell me

sing me

yell me

whisper...

I've heard it all.

Truth is maddening

like girls knowing that they should lose a little more weight

and boys

should be a little more stronger

to hold up the nothingness that girls will become.

Ringing

is everywhere

but I can't bare to speak out.

I will say nothing tonight

remain silent

like sweet drips of honey down my throat.

I can feel the curve of his smile

against my lips

as I tell him my fantasies.

Drip

drop.

Tick

tock.

He'll swallow me like wine

letting me wallow

hoping that I would be fine

in the end

after it all

the melody is soft

and will lift him too high

for me to follow.

Boy

you

waste away

before me

with each ring,

each tick.

I'll pass on another night

and just let you sweat it out.