It's been awhile has it not?

Since the last time we talked,

Since that day, what can I say?

My memory lurks back when I silently walk.

My heart still pounds when I think,

Especially when I think of you.

What happened there, your empty stare,

It's still hard to think it all through.

My soul had been broken

Like an old mirror, full of cracks,

My heart in shards, my mind torn apart,

And some comfort you seemed to lack.

I guess it was fatally mutual;

An agreement made in silence.

First locked the door, then cleared the floor,

As it left rules dead in defiance.

How did it start again?

Was it my words or your compassionate look?

From what I felt, as you undid my belt,

One touch was all it took.

Desperation can drive a man to the edge,

So how far away from it did you stand?

I spilled my soul, and dug this hole,

While you took hold of my hand.

The way you whispered in my ear,

I gave my mind and body blindly.

You had so much power, in that dark hour,

Yet you treated me so kindly.

Oh, how naive I was then,

As my shirt fell to the ground,

I was too trusting, you were lusting,

And that was the solution we found.

I should have stopped after the first kiss,

But how could I, you controlled me.

Your hand on my cheek, my tears still leak,

You kissed me softly and I couldn't see.

My body was your playground,

My hair your fingers' seesaw,

My lips the swings, my chest play things.

I couldn't help being numb and raw.

A passion play I should never have done,

I should've never given you control.

Saliva and sweat, as our bodies met,

I should've never given you the key to my soul.

I still shutter as I walk down that hall.

My pulse rages as I go by that classroom.

A sense of vile fear, just as I go near,

The place where I knew my doom.

Do you think of my now and then?

Do you get enough sleep at night?

Do you even care, about the pain you cause me there?

Do you know of my never-ebbing fright?

I thought I could finally trust someone,

Trust them enough to help see my hell through.

But you don't give a damn, don't give a shit who I am,

And I know that someone is not you.

Blood, sweat, tears, flesh,

That classroom reeks of the memory's lust.

Bruises black and blue, and just the thought of you,

Makes me sick with anger and disgust.

When I look in the mirror,

The bruises still shine on me.

A reminder of you, and my hatred too,

As I harvest my field of insanity.

It hurts like hell,

And I hope you feel it too.

Blood boiled with hate, anniversary of that date,

I hope you drown in the agony too.

For what you did, I loath and fear you…