Niall sat in the middle of the courtyard with his back against a tree, guitar in hand as usual. He had stopped getting strange looks from people months ago for bringing his guitar out, for which he was thankful. People at Eldermoor could be so judgmental of everything, though he found that it didn’t bother him much anymore. It was because of Eldermoor that he had met Luke, and that he was finally happy. If it weren’t for being there, he would still be at that horrid Christian school anyway, so he supposed that this was the lesser of two evils. At least he had friends at Eldermoor—friends who obviously knew him better than he had realized. Yet there were also friends that he felt like he didn’t know at all.

Niall leaned forward a bit, observing his hand slightly as he slid a pick over the strings. He wasn’t really playing anything; it was just an idle thing for his hand to be doing. His tattered black notebook sat on the floor next to him, open to a mostly blank page. There was writing scribbled across the top and some of the margins, but the majority of the page was blank. The notebook was running out of pages; he’d have to get a new one soon.

A gust of wind blew through the trees, making Niall stop playing for a second to draw his coat more tightly around him. He didn’t know why he was outside in such a thin sweater in December in Massachusetts. He was lucky it wasn’t raining or snowing, because they’d been getting some already, and they were told it would only get colder. Luke said that they hadn’t had such a cold winter the year before.

Suddenly, there was another body next to Niall. He looked up, startled, to see Donovan sitting next to him in a sweater and a scarf, looking almost cute. Almost anyone could look cute in a scarf, though.

“We have to stop meeting like this,” Niall joked half-heartedly, remembering the last time Donovan had talked to him by the very same tree, while he had been playing his guitar. Donovan just shook his head.

“Well it’s not like this campus is teeming with places to hang out,” Donovan commented idly, the tiniest vestige of his accent shining through. It was extremely encouraging to Niall though; he hadn’t heard even a bit of it since they had spoken on the phone over summer.

“Well—true,” Niall conceded after a moment. He didn’t know why it was that he and Don always seemed to be pretending that nothing was wrong, but it just kept happening, and Niall didn’t really know what to do about it. It seemed almost unavoidable.

“Although I don’t know what you’re doing outside,” Don replied. “You’ll catch a chill.”

Niall rolled his eyes. “I could say the same for you, mother,” he teased.

“Point taken.”

They sat there for a few seconds in a silence that wasn’t exactly comfortable. Niall shifted awkwardly, glancing at the dark-haired boy out of the corner of his eyes. Don seemed entirely unaffected by the strange air that hung between them. He seemed entirely at ease.

Niall sighed. “Don—I don’t mean to look a gift horse in the mouth or anything,” Niall began, “but why exactly are you here? I mean, it’s not that I really mind or anything, it’s just…you’ve been rather anti-me lately.”

Niall looked over at the dark-eyed boy, not sure if he should really expect an answer or not. That was the thing with Donovan; he rarely explained his actions, and even if he did, his explanations rarely made sense. You had to just kind of learn how to accept Donovan as he was, or you were pretty screwed. And Niall had been trying—really trying. But the other boy had still been ignoring him.

Donovan just shrugged. “You’re my friend, right?”

Niall sighed again. “Of course I’m your friend,” he told the older boy, silently adding, no matter how difficult it is sometimes. “It’s just—after I found out about…your cutting, you turned all sullen again. And I had just thought we had gotten past that. Actually, you were like that since just after summer.”

Donovan averted his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he whispered after a long silence. “It’s just—I feel so…” He trailed off.

“So what?” Niall prompted. He hadn’t even expected an attempt at an answer from Don, so things were already going better than expected.

Don took a deep breath, eyes still focused on a blade of grass he was running through his gloved fingertips. “Have you ever felt like you’re disappointing everyone you know, but you can’t do anything about it? Have you ever felt like you wished you were different?” he questioned.

It was Niall’s turn to take a deep breath. This was a chance to confide in Don, and hopefully get the other boy to confide in him. But he hadn’t ever really managed to say the words ‘I’m gay’ to anyone before. In the past, people had usually just found out. He had never really told Will per se, Luke had known, and so had everyone else he had met at Eldermoor. He didn’t know if Don knew or not, though.

Finally, Niall worked up the courage to actually say it. “How about being gay?”

Donovan’s eyes shot up to meet his once again. “Wait—you’re…?” he began.

“Yeah,” Niall replied after a second. It was getting easier to admit it each and every time.

Donovan hid a smile behind his hand, the first that Niall had seen since the new school year had started. Niall raised an eyebrow at the other boy and Don fought to suppress a laugh. “Oh,” he gasped out between a small gasp and a chuckle.

“What?” Niall demanded, put off by Don’s strange behavior. It reminded him of Luke’s reaction when he had told the blond boy about his friendship with William.

Donovan removed his hand, smiling cockily at the other boy. “Me too,” he said after a minute.

Niall’s eyes widened. “What?” he demanded in shock. “Since when?” He couldn’t believe that Annette had been right about Donovan. Perhaps he should rely on her to tell who was gay.

Don rolled his eyes. “Since always, you dolt!” he exclaimed, though his voice didn’t really get loud. His accent was extremely apparent that time. “It’s not as if I became so overnight.”

Niall let out an exasperated breath. “Well I know that. But I mean…why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Donovan retorted.

Niall laughed slightly. “All right, I get it,” he said. “But I’m surprised you didn’t know. It seems that everyone I’ve met since I came to Eldermoor knew that I was gay from the beginning and just didn’t say anything. And like half of them are gay too, and I had no idea.”

“Like your delightful little flatmate?” Donovan asked, his voice slightly sarcastic.

“You knew about that too?” Niall asked, feeling even more out of the loop.

Donovan shrugged nonchalantly. “Everyone kind of found out after what happened with Adrian and…Kevin,” he replied, pausing uncomfortably before the last word. Niall almost jumped at the opportunity to ask about it. He had been hearing about Adrian and Kevin since his first day of Eldermoor, yet there had never really been a proper opportunity to ask.

“What did happen with them anyway? I keep hearing about it, but…” Niall said as casually as he could manage. He knew that Kevin was Donovan’s best friend, and he knew that Don hated Adrian, so this had the potential of developing into a possibly hazardous subject, like Don’s cutting had. Niall wanted badly to ask about that too, but he knew better than to do so by that point.

Don laughed, though there was no humor in it. “I can imagine so. There isn’t much interesting that happens here,” he said sardonically.

Niall stared at the other boy, waiting to see if he would answer the question about Kevin. Donovan sat in silence for a few moments, seeming to choose his words carefully. Finally, he spoke.

“Adrian…took advantage of Kevin’s…attraction to him.”

Niall’s eyes widened, the possibilities behind that statement whirling through his head. “What kind of advantage?” he inquired after a second. “Did he…” Niall couldn’t make himself get the words out.

“Rape him?” Donovan replied tonelessly. “That’s up for debate. No one who works here seems to believe that.”

Niall swallowed nervously. It was possible that Adrian wasn’t really as good a guy as he was starting to seem. Well, not good exactly…but just not evil—and ‘not evil’ didn’t really constitute as ‘good’. Niall would still call the guy and asshole, but he seemed to really love Brad, and Brad seemed to love him, though the quiet boy was incredibly hard to read.

But the last thing that Don needed to know was that he was spending time with Adrian. Niall changed the subject slightly.

“So your best friend is gay too? Have you two…” Niall started. He seemed to have a real trouble finishing sentences that day. Don seemed to get what he meant, however.

“No,” Donovan replied immediately. “I mean…we’ve kissed and such, but it never went further than that. We thought it would work out, you know, because we’re such good mates and all. ‘Friends make the best lovers,’ and all that shit. But that just made it…strange, I suppose. We both thought so.”

Niall suddenly found himself insanely curious. It was weird to have so many other gay friends to talk to, but weird in a good way.

“So have you ever…you know…done more with anyone?”

Donovan blushed and looked back down at the grass. “No,” he confessed. “Never.”

Niall laughed. It was so cute the way that Donovan had blushed when he said that. It had definitely been a sight to see.

“It’s not funny!” Don exclaimed, though he was half laughing as well. “It’s a bit embarrassing, really.”

Niall shook his head. “No, no. It’s not that,” Niall assured his friend quickly. “It’s just…God, you were blushing so much. You were completely red.” His pale complexion hadn’t helped matters much either.

“Oh sod off,” Don snapped, though it was clear that he wasn’t really angry.

Niall put a hand on the other boy’s arm. “Really, it’s nothing to be embarrassed by, Don,” he promised. “You’re only fifteen; there’s no reason that you should have lost your virginity yet.”

Don raised an eyebrow at him. “But you have,” he said with certainty.

Niall blushed a little himself as he thought of how old he had been when he had lost his virginity. It wasn’t as bad as Will’s age when Niall had taken it, however.

“Well…yes,” Niall admitted.

“And how many people have you slept with?” Don questioned. Obviously, Niall wasn’t the only one who was curious.

“As of this weekend? Two.”

Don’s other eyebrow arched to join the first. “This weekend, hmmm? So who did you just shag?” he asked inquisitively.

Niall barely held in a laugh at the word ‘shag’, blushing even deeper this time. “How do you think I knew that Luke was gay?” he asked sheepishly.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Niall walked back to his dorm room, cold but feeling at ease. His conversation with Donovan had made him feel even better, especially since he had barely had one since the new school year had started. He still worried about the other boy and the fact that he was hurting himself, but it seemed a distant concern at the time.

Opening the door, Niall stepped inside, spotting Luke immediately. He deposited his guitar case on is bed and moved right to Luke’s, pulling a book out of the blond boy’s hands and sliding into Luke’s arms. “I’m cold,” he complained, snuggling himself close to his boyfriend’s body. “Warm me up?”

Luke shook his head with a small chuckle. “I told you to bring a bigger jacket than that, Niall,” he scolded.

“Just be quiet and put your arms around me,” Niall said playfully. Luke obeyed, and Niall found himself being warmed quickly by the other boy’s comfortable embrace. Five days together and he was already not only comfortable but extremely blissful with the other boy.

Niall scooted closer to the other body, trying to keep from falling off the edge of the bed. Luke noticed this immediately. “The small bed isn’t really good for the two of us,” Luke commented, tightening his arm around Niall.

Niall glanced over at his own bed for a second before an idea struck him. “Why don’t we just push them together?” he asked after a moment. “It’s not like they ever check curfew anymore anyway.” It was true that they had stopped after the end of the previous year. Possibly the school figured they couldn’t stop the high school age kids from doing what they wanted.

Luke gave a nervous laugh. “That sounds like an adventure,” he replied.

Niall poked him in the side. “No, seriously. Let’s do it,” he urged. “Come on…we’ll need the space…”
Luke laughed out loud this time at the open insinuation behind those words. “All right, Niall,” he agreed finally. “Let’s do it.”

Feeling suddenly excited about the prospect, Niall slid out of Luke’s arms and went across the room, pulling the guitar off his bed and replacing it to its usual location in the closet. Luke was slower to rise than he, but by the time Niall had put his instrument away, Luke was up and ready.

“What do we do about the nightstand in the middle?” Niall asked, spotting the problem immediately. “And the phone?”

Luke shrugged. “Move the phone to your nightstand. You get more phone calls than I do anyway,” he proposed. “Then just…move the extra nightstand off to the side or something.”

Niall walked around to the middle nightstand. With some difficulty, he was able to transfer the phone cord behind his bed and to the nightstand on the other side. He motioned to Luke, and they moved the small table, though it wasn’t that heavy, to the empty corner by Luke’s bed.

“Now it’s time for the beds,” Niall said.

“Oh joy,” was the muted reply from his boyfriend. Niall rolled his eyes.

“Just help me move mine over a little, and then we’ll move yours,” Niall told Luke, watching as the other boy nodded. With a great deal of pushing and pulling—and finding out that the mattresses didn’t stay on the frames very well—they had the beds pushed together, roughly in the middle of the room. Next, they had to move the side nightstands over just a bit so that they weren’t too far from the newly-formed, larger bed.

The two boys collapsed tiredly onto their new bed, and they had enough room that time. “See?” Niall said. “It was worth it.”

“Now the only problem is that the sheet probably isn’t big enough.”

Niall exhaled exasperatedly. “We’ll deal with that later,” he stated, rolling over to face the other boy. “Right now, I’m kind of interested in something else.”

“I think you’re a sex fiend,” Luke said, his voice disturbingly flat. The two boys looked at each other for a second, then laughed.

“Or you’re just too damn hot to keep my hands off of.”

Luke smiled. “I think I like that explanation better,” he replied, pulling Niall on top of him. The other boy complied readily, straddling his boyfriend’s hips. Luke caught Niall’s lips with his own, hands running in a languid caress down Niall’s spine. Niall shivered at the sensation, hands moving immediately to the buttons of Luke’s uniform’s shirt. They had both abandoned their ties already, so Niall began slowly undoing the buttons, letting his hands sweep over Luke’s skin as he did so. Luke too shuddered beneath him, and Niall could already feel Luke’s forming arousal pressing into his thigh.

Luke had the shirt off quickly, sliding it off the other boy’s shoulders. It was the first time since they had gotten back from California that they had attempted to do this.

“We’re going to have to be quiet this time,” Niall said, his voice husky with arousal. “Can you do that?”

Luke nodded emphatically, greedily pressing his lips to Niall’s once again and sliding his tongue inside. Niall met the warmth with his own, joining the other boy’s tongue with torrid, wet strokes. Niall slid Luke’s shirt all the way off, feeling the familiar rough skin of his boyfriend’s numerous scars. He traced his hand over the scar on Luke’s collarbone, having gotten used to the face that touches to the tender skin always sent a little gasp to the blond’s lips.

Niall moved his mouth instead to Luke’s newly-exposed nipples, running his tongue around them roughly and breaking the rhythm every so often with small nibbles and bites. He heard harsh gasps from above him and the occasional soft moan, but Luke was keeping his word about being quiet. The other boys in the dorm probably wouldn’t appreciate it much if he wasn’t.

Niall quickly worked his hands to the other boy’s pants, letting them ghost over the rather obvious bulge there. Luke shivered again, the sound turning into a gasp as Niall actually started to undo his pants. He slid them down Luke’s slim hips along with the other boy’s boxers. He placed a quick kiss on Luke’s lower stomach, but did not move to his arousal, as Luke clearly hoped.

“Get up here; you’re still fully clothed,” Luke commanded, and Niall obeyed quickly, sliding up Luke’s body to place another kiss on his lips. Together, they worked on the buttons of his shirt, sliding it off and throwing it onto the growing pile on the floor. His pants and boxers were discarded just as quickly.

Niall reached over into the drawer by the bed, puling out a condom and lubricant. Luke looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “I took the liberty of transferring these things to where we would need them,” Niall explained, and Luke quickly accepted that, fingernails trailing lightly down Niall’s sides as he focused on the lube.

Luke’s hand moved to Niall’s erection, stroking it lazily. Niall groaned as quietly as he could manage, struggling with the tube he was trying to open. “You know, that makes it really hard to do this,” Niall commented, fingers stumbling over the container as Luke’s strokes, instead of stopping, became firmer.

Niall growled, getting the tube open finally and kissing the boy beneath him harshly, worrying Luke’s lower lip with his teeth. His other hand trailed down Luke’s body, feeling pleased as the other boy immediately pulled his legs up to give Niall access to his entrance. Niall let his hand run lightly over Luke’s erection again, feeling the other boy arch into his touch.

Quickly, Niall’s fingers found the other boy’s opening, sliding one slick finger inside. Again, Luke seemed very relaxed and adjusted to the intrusion quickly. Niall slid in another finger, but even that didn’t last long, and a third joined it almost as quickly.

After thrusting his fingers in and out of Luke’s opening a few times, the other boy began grasping frantically at him, though he couldn’t speak due to Niall’s mouth on his. Niall interpreted the gesture well enough and removed his fingers from the other boy’s body, opening the condom and slicking his own erection quickly. He positioned himself at Luke’s entrance, and after a second, he thrust himself all the way in.

Niall caught his boyfriend’s moan in his mouth, thankful that it was not released to alert the other students in the dormitory building. He placed a finger over Luke’s lips. “Shh…quiet,” he reminded the other boy before he began to thrust.

Luke threw his head back in silent pleasure, trying his best to stifle his moans. Niall did the same, thrusting in and out of Luke’s tight heat. After a few thrusts, Niall obviously found the other boy’s prostate, and Luke bit his lip hard to keep from crying out. Niall grasped Luke’s erection in his hand, stroking it in time with his thrusts just as he caught Luke’s lips again to silence the resulting groan. He felt the cold metal of Luke’s cross necklace against his chest, still astounded at Luke’s capacity to bend and still not be dreadfully uncomfortable.

Luke hooked his legs behind Niall’s back, pulling Niall even deeper inside of him. Both of them let out a muffled moan at the action. Niall increased his pace, and after a few more of those thrusts, they were both gone, finding release at nearly the exact moment.

Niall collapsed on his lover for a few seconds, trying to calm his harsh breathing, before rolling off and pulling Luke against his chest. They needed to clean themselves off, but Niall couldn’t make himself care at the moment. He felt too perfect.

Looking at the beautiful boy he held in his arms, Niall felt content for the first time in a long time. Perhaps his exile at Eldermoor had cost him a nearly two year relationship. Perhaps it had made him get used to so many people, with so many new secrets and problems. Perhaps it had pulled him away from all he had ever known or cared about.

But at that moment, Niall was almost happy about it. Niall placed a kiss on his new boyfriend’s neck, feeling finally content. Being sent to Eldermoor, though it had originally seemed like a curse, had turned out to be the greatest gift he could have ever been given.