Title: Darren

Author: Eáránë Serágon

Rating: G

A/N : For my creative writing class, we were assigned to make up a character and write a small diddy involving them. Everyone's was so predicable, so I made mine different.

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How could he feel this way?

He was disgusting, a mutant, pathetic, horrible, unnatural.

He was vile, gross, un-Christian, an abomination.

Why did he feel like this? Why was he born like this? Was this just a phase he was going through? What were these feelings?

”It’s sick, Darren. It’s disgusting. How could you be this way? We raised you better than that!”

Disgusting. He was disgusting.

”All those years of going to church, wasted. Wasted on you. Didn’t you learn anything? God will never love something so un-natural.”

God didn’t love him. His parents thought he was disgusting. Maybe he was. But... if it was so wrong, why did it feel so right? Why did everything else feel so wrong?

If it was so un-natural, then why did it feel so unbelievably natural to him?

Walking through the streets, alone, he often glimpsed young couples kissing, being affectionate. They could do so publically - they had nothing to fear. They weren’t disgusting to humanity. They weren’t something to be shamed, as he was.

Was it too much to be tired of being shamed? Was it too much to be tired of being cast aside?

He didn’t care how disgusting it was. He didn’t care how vile, how pathetic, how horrible, how unnatural. He didn’t care that it was vile, un-Christian, and gross. He didn’t care. He really didn’t.

But if he didn’t care - then why, when his parents would use those words to describe him, his heart would get a little tighter, and his eyes would get a little more moist then they normally would be?

He did care.

However, it was the way he was. It was a fact of life. He couldn’t change it, and if asked, he didn’t think he would change it either. No matter how many people told him he was the son of the devil, no matter how many people waved signs in his face and gave him disgusted, dirty looks. They could look all they wanted. It was them who were making it more of an issue then it had to be.

That’s right.

No matter how disgusting, how vile, and how un-Christian.

He would hold hands with his boyfriend on the street, like any normal couple would.

He would show them he was no different, just in love, like anybody else in the world.

Because when he looks into those eyes, the eyes of the one he knows he loves, no matter how wrong it may be to everyone else, no matter how un-natural, and no matter how many times god damns it in the bible, he sees love returned, and he sees the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with.

And he knows, now, how he could possibly feel this way.