Utter Confusion

You came to me and smiled
And I couldn't help smiling back
You came to me and introduced yourself
And I gladly gave you my name
You came to me with interests
And I gave off an aura that said I agreed

You came again and you took me away
I let myself go without a question
You came again and you took my hand
I don't know why I let you hold it
You came again and you made me smile
I don't know why I let myself fall into it

You touched me once on my face
And all I did was blush and smile
You touched me once on my shoulder
And all I did was reach out and take your hand
You touched me once and I saw it in your eyes
And all I did was think of someone else

You told me that you thought I was great
I took the compliment and leaned on you
You told me that you thought I was beautiful
I began to feel a bit uncomfortable but stayed
You told me that you saw me as something special
I realized then what I was doing to you

I said to you that I needed a minute
You watched me run to the bathroom
I said to them that I was so confused
You were told I only wanted you as a friend
I said to you exactly what I meant
You took friends as a way of me hiding feelings

I stayed with you and we talked for so long
You listened to all I had to say happily
I stayed with you and told you of unhealed wounds
You seemed to understand more than I wanted you too
I stayed with you and admitted I felt guilty
You told me that you didn't care and wanted different circumstances

You gave me a peace I wanted in a friend
I saw you still looked at me as potentially more
You gave me a last dance and held me close
I wanted to pull away, but didn't want you hurt
You gave me a kiss and told me goodnight
And I ran away terrified, and in utter confusion

Authors Note: Well, there was this guy I met at a dance. He was cool, and sweet, and adorable, but I knew just by the fact that he had quite a few piercings and long hair and was just awesomely punk/goth rocker kind of guy that my parents would shoot, then shoot me. And I guess that even though I knew it wouldn't work out I let it go, and led him on, which isn't like me at all! And so I've just felt like so terrible about it. I realized I let it go, because I miss having someone to lean on, someone to hold me… it's been hard getting over my ex, cuz even though I'd never want to have anything to do with him like that again most likely, after 9 months it just feels empty when I'm there with no one holding me and telling me they care, that they think I look beautiful, and that they love me…