removable discontinuities

i am more than a byproduct, more than a derivative
i will prove the geometric algebraic analytic proof of my existence
beyond being pawn from dawn to dusk to dust
more than beyond, beyond more than – beyond the limits
beyond the sea of humanity reality rationality
summation of infinity and void beyond the limits of sanity
as c – the real sea – approaches i – the imaginary I –
the eye of the storm

we were one from the beginning
(or so i thought) but he was so cold
he had his other animals to play with
those uneducated, uncivilized beasts
that he held power over
after all, he had the privilege of christening
them with his foolish pet names
however ridiculous and degrading
while i was nothing to him
a pathetic so-called “companion”
loyal, lovable dog to throw to and fetch
a mere bone of a rib
removed without so much as a thought
an effortless creation

do severed connections and shared names
constitute eternal bondage?
you have not one profound experience
but though the vicarious
living through me, feeling through me
and now falling through me because of me
i will take you down with me all the way
you will taste the fruit yourself
and together we’ll rot in its bittersweet essence
i think i can think for my self (or lack thereof)
and i think i think of gratifying retribution
for your contribution (or lack thereof)
to my life, my heart, my thought
it’s the thought that we share not only bone
but brain that terrifies me most
an ungrounded fear apparently
but perhaps not as my resolve dissolves
collapse synapse relapse

i feel i can think i am logical reasonable rational
divide and conquer your mind with my mind
divide by zero and conquer nil – i find you’re undefined
complex but real you impenetrable you intangible
you broke all the rules you set as tools
and i realize i can’t surmise i can’t realize
the truth and fullness of your self and image
and yours and his self-image – the image of God

i seem to have lost you in the process lost myself in the progress
regress repress depress no peace of mind but a piece of your mind
and i’ve reasoned myself out of my own reasoning
but at least now i have a chance and at least now i know