-Swallowing my feelings-

Swallowing my feelings
poison running through my veins.
This is the beginning
to my everlasting chains.
I want, I need, I wish
but I can only see
everything gone with a swish
as no one tries to find the key.
I know I need to speak out
but my voice has left me
my heart is full of doubt
pleading to be free.
But I am clouded by my fear
and hurt by loneliness
I feel love near
but I turn it into nothingness.
I let someone else take away
what perhaps could be mine, never will.
I will never be able to say,
what I feel, and it makes me ill.
Feeling the venom inside of me
that feeds my tormented feeling
but I guess they'll never see
that nothing inside me is healing.
So in my life I'll always be,
swallowing my feelings.

By, Ana F.
Date: March 18, 2005
Time: 8:08pm

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I wrote this because I’ve always lived my life ignoring my feelings toward the guys I like. Mainly because my friends like them, and I know I have a lesser chance than they do. So I’m feeling this constant pain when I see them speak about him, or when they talk all sweet and flirty, because I think “That could’ve been me” but never will be.