What is love, shall you ask

It is friendship…set on fire.

Fire which burns through the appendix

And into the sacred organs of a guy's genitals

Fire which fumes through the whole body

And plants itself in the nerves of the brain

If those exact same cells haven't been burned off yet

They say that true love is blind

That's why it stumbles in the dark and makes opposites attract

It makes the prettiest girl fall head over heels

For the guy with about a million zits on his face

And the most desperate people cannot find it

Why we have so many prostitutes roaming the dark streets

And so many pimps soliciting them by day

Why the person who wanted to wait a few more years

Is kissing the shoes of her love

Why 80 year olds want to get it on with 8 year olds

Why Wacko Jacko got it on with Bubbles the monkey

And 12 year olds are sneaking out

For the "pleasure" with a 37 year old

So before you say that true love is predestined

And that everyone will eventually find it

Remember this:

The obstacles of finding that one true love

May include your brush with AIDS.