Secret sin

Night once more and I'm writing

By lamplight, laid on my bed

The whole world sleeps but me

But I'd rather write instead

I rarely write in the day time

I prefer the shelter of night

Cloaked by a thick sheet of chocolate

When I have control of the light

The clock ticks past twelve as I write this

My family asleep in there beds

Not knowing that I'm awake writing

Their thought's flow as dreams through their heads

None of them know that I write this

Very few people do

What would they say if I told them?

What would they do if they knew?

I could never explain why I have to

It's a drug, a fix I must get

Am I ashamed of my feelings?

We've only so much blood to let

Then why can I share this with strangers

Who neither know nor care about me?

Why can I not tell my loved ones?

Why can I not let them see?

The need to record this is startling

It's something I've tried to suppress

But I can't, so instead I hide it

And make meanings harder to guess

I hear a tread on the stair now

Why do I think I must hide?

I bury my book in my pillow

And switch off the lamp by my side

I shut my eyes tight and breathe slowly

A chink of light shines through my eyes

I hear the door close and relax

But why must I live with these lies?