Chapter 1: Unearthing

Toviel smiled like he always did. Even when he was sad. Even when he was dying inside. Always smiling. Just a sweet, earnest, heartwarming smile for any passer-by, any lucky stranger to come his way.

He’d smiled all the while when Nadia, his best friend and crush, told him her secret crush; Patterson Matthews. He’d smiled everyday as she told him about all the wonderful things “Patty” would achieve and how “deep” and “sincere” he was. He’d smiled while she slowly stopped being as anti-smoking as she used to be, slowly accepting it and somewhat encouraging it, all because HE, Patty Matthews, was a smoker.

He’d smiled encouragingly when she’d declared she’d built up the courage to ask him out. He’d smiled happily when she came back victorious. He’d smiled approvingly as she told him all about their first date and he’d smiled sweetly all week as she chattered on about their one-month anniversary.

And now he was smiling at her as she kissed “Patty” tenderly on the lips, right in front of him, then took a drag of “Patty’s” offered cigarette, waved to her best friend, and stepped into her boyfriend’s car and drove off to who knows where.

He was shattered inside.

The moment he got home and past his parents with a casual grin, he locked to door to his room and let it all out. Tears and sobs wretched his body as he curled up in the fetal position on his bed, back against the wall, trying to fight his wild imagination.

Patty and Nadia were holding each other lovingly, kissing madly, Patty slowly unbuttoning her pale green dress she’d arrived in. He was touching her…

Toviel hated himself. Nadia was smarter than that. She’d never give herself away like that. Then again…she hadn’t been smart enough to avoid getting into smoking…

His long black bangs fell over what could be seen of his face, the rest of his hair in a mess, as usual. He clenched his hands together over his knees, pale skin barely visible because of his long-sleeved black shirt and pants. He’d always been a “meek” type of guy, never wanting to reveal much skin or to stand out too much. Black suited him best.

Why was he doing this to himself again? Beating himself up over things he had no control over? Nadia didn’t like him that way, she never would. Plain and simple. Why couldn’t he just be happy for her?

He pounded the back of his head against the wall behind him. He would be a good best friend! He would not ruin things for her!

A smile crept to his lips again. It was forced, pained, but there. He would just have to live with it.

---

It had been three weeks since that day. Since the day Toviel had broken down, that is. He’d gotten a lot better at keeping up the facade, he almost never cried anymore when he got home from school. It was a good improvement, for his standards anyway. Gawd, he was such a wuss.

It was Saturday today, a little after noon. Nadia wanted him to go to the arcade with her today. Saturdays were when they did their best friend things, just the two of them, having fun goofing off and laughing. It was sad that this was all that Toviel looked forward to every week of every month. Was his life that pathetic? No wonder Nadia didn’t return his feelings…

So he trudged along the sidewalk to the plaza they always met at, still dressed completely in black. Black turtleneck, black jeans, black zipped up vest, black backpack. According to Nadia, all the black he wore and his black hair brought out his eyes. Toviel had taken the compliment to heart. She’d always said she was jealous of his bright green-grey eyes. They were dark green around the edges, and the green became paler as it neared the pupil, finally turning completely grey around the pupil itself. She’d told him his eyes were “artistic” whereas he’d always thought of them as just plain weird.

As he made to turn the corner that would bring him to the fountain they always met at, he froze in his tracks at the sound of a familiar voice.

“So where is your girly little Goth friend anyway?” Patty’s voice.

“He’s not Goth!” Nadia’s voice retaliated, “He just likes wearing black! And he’s not that girly! I’m sure he’ll be here soon. He doesn’t know you’re coming you know.”

“Shouldn’t you have told him?”

“Oh, don’t worry about Tovy! I’m sure he won’t mind.”

Toviel felt his insides eating away at him. He was angry, hurt, dejected and stunned all at once. And that was a lot to feel in one go. He peered around the corner, his face barely visible. Nadia had her arms around Patterson’s neck, they were kissing, his hands where on her backside…

Saturdays were reserved for only Toviel and Nadia. That had been the agreement. That was how they’d made sure that they wouldn’t drift apart despite the redheaded girl’s new boyfriend. They had agreed on this. Was spending time with Patterson every lunch hour, sitting beside him every class and going out with him every Friday and Sunday not enough for her? So now “Patty-Dearest” needed to cut in on best friend-time too?

Deep down he knew what was happening. She had a boyfriend, so she didn’t really need a BEST FRIEND anymore. It was childish. She just needed a normal friend, one to listen to her troubles and comfort her in bad times and be happy with her when good things came her way.

He was being replaced, and there wasn’t a thing in the world he could do about it.

He felt his façade crack, break, and shatter. He felt his smile fail and his eyes start welling up with tears. He considered yelling something at her before running off, so that she’d chase him and apologize to him and tell him how much she hadn’t realized he’d take it that way, how it would never happen again and how she wanted them to stay friends for life...

But that was just childish. Besides, it would make her feel bad. It would make her unhappy. The friendship was doomed to die anyway, he could try and preserve it just a bit longer, but they would only end up drifting apart anyway. It was like trying to defy the inevitable. It was pointless.

And so, without a sound, he turned on his heels and ran back the way he’d come. He wasn’t really looking where he was going; it was a miracle he hadn’t bumped into anyone on the way. He’d missed the turn he needed to take to get home, but he didn’t care. He just kept on running away from a feeling he couldn’t escape.

Is this what going crazy feels like? he wondered through his state.

Toviel’s left eye was burning. He must have gotten something in it while he was running blindly, so he lifted his hand to wipe it away with his tears as he stumbled forward at full speed. But his eye continued to hurt. Whatever it was wouldn’t come out, the pain wouldn’t stop! It started making his whole head pound, and he rubbed at the eye furiously, trying in vain to clear it.

He’d been so wrapped up in getting whatever it was out of his eye while running madly in any given direction that he hadn’t looked ahead of him fast enough. The moment he’d looked up, it was too late. He vaguely registered that he was near a harbor, that he was running over a bridge that arched over train tracks in a deserted area surrounded by old warehouses. But at the very moment that he looked up, still in a full run, the thing he registered most of all was the teenage girl that stood directly in his path.

She froze, he turned to avoid her, he hit something cold and hard near his hip, the world was spinning, he was falling, and it was all happening so fast…

He was falling off of the bridge, headfirst. It was high, he had time to think. His eye was still burning, and now so was his back. Wind rushed past his ears and forced his eyes shut. The ground was nearing; it would only be a few more seconds…

A pain like no other surged through him. Toviel screamed, it felt like his back was exploding, like his eyeball was being wrenched out of its socket. His eyes became wide as he was turned right-side up, all because he was waving his arms around. But no, his hands were clenching his head, fighting the ache. He glanced to the side only to catch a glimpse of a wet, black feathery wing swish in and out of his sight as he was lifted up, up, up…

Higher than the bridge, over the girl, everything was so confusing, the PAIN was unbearable! He shot forward through the air, hardly seeing where he was headed, his eye still smoldering, every single wing-beat a throbbing effort. He hit something, or landed on it sloppily, rolling over the rough area and trying to hold still. He was still alive…

He blinked. The pain in his eye had dulled but the pain on his back ached still. He looked around. He was lying on roof tiles, and near him was a cross. He’d landed on a church’s roof.

He clumsily crawled over to the cross, wrapping his arms around it and clinging to it as if it were life itself. He noticed the blood now, all over his shoulders and sticking on his back. Some was on his cheek too. Had his eye bled? It felt almost fine now.

But he still shook all over, his shirt and vest being completely torn off during his flight. He couldn’t go home like this…Not with these wings… He lifted a trembling finger to inspect the now cool wetness that had been running from his eye. Lifting the shaky digit back into view, his fear was confirmed. Blood.

How had he bled from his eye? Didn’t that mean he had internal bleeding or something? But if that was the case, wouldn’t the blood come out of his other eye, his ears and his nose as well? What was happening to him?

Too many changes, and far too fast. He’d have to try and make it home, gather his things and leave. He’d go to see Father Julius in the church below him afterwards; the priest was someone trustworthy… He’d ask him for advice, move on from there. Yes. That was the plan. It was the only plan he had, anyway.

He peered down through the dimming light of the setting sun as he noticed movement down on the ground, on the other side of the street. How did it get so late at night? To his surprise, he recognized one of them was Nadia. The other was obviously Patterson. They were looking around, peering into alleys and asking questions to strangers.

“TOVIEEEEEEL!!” he heard Nadia call. She looked really worried.

So they were looking for him? Or at least Nadia was.

“You’re sure you’re not overreacting or something?” Patty muttered to her, “I mean, so his folks said he wasn’t home yet. Maybe he just blew us off or whatever…”

“No, no!” Nadia persisted, “Tovy’s not like that! He never misses our Saturday friend-time! TOVIIIIIEEEEEL! Tov--”

Then she looked up. She stared straight at him. With the black wings sticking out of his back, blood drying over his front and under his left eye, gripping onto the cross of the church. And he stared back.

It lasted about 20 seconds. Their eyes were locked. Toviel couldn’t move and Nadia was too stunned. She finally whipped around to Patty, forcing him to turn and look up as well, but only to make him stare at the steeple of the church. Her Tovy was gone.

The dark-haired boy lay on the opposite all of the church, over his wings, staring up at the red-streaked sky. He would not go to her. He would not. It would be too much to explain. She’d assume she’d seen a ghost, she’d tell his parents, and he’d have disappeared from their lives. He needed time to digest all of this. It would likely take a lifetime.

“Goodbye Nadia…”

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Review!

Ahem. Sorry. Hi there! I thought up this story a while ago, and I’ve been slowly but surely sorting out a plot. I’ve finally decided to start writing it and see what other people think of it, so here it is. Mostly slash to come, I’m not planning on publishing this or anything so I don’t care much about situations and content that publishers don’t like. It frees a lot of creative thinking.

PLEASE review this after reading it! It only takes a second; write whatever, I don’t care if it’s just a word, I NEED FEEDBACK! I really hope you like this chapter and that it compels you to read later installments.

-Nat