The Skin on My Wrist

The skin on my wrist tingles-

I want to do it

But I can’t do it.

Watched constantly.

Can’t mess up.

Can’t give up.

Can’t get away from

This God forsaken place.

I need the truth.

I need an escape.

I need a hug

To make this better.

Lost in their lies.

Lost in my innocence.

Lost in the influential eyes

Of a person I thought I loved.

Other people do it-

Why can’t I?

Why do I have to be

The perfect daughter with

The perfect grades and

The perfect friends?

I hate it.

I hate life.

I hate the mask

That I put on every morning.

I hate the smile that

Impulsively hangs on my face.

I don’t want to live.

I don’t want to die.

I don’t want to go on

Living a life I can’t stand

They love me.

They hate me.

They could care less about me-

A forgotten life.

I walk on this earth.

I walk on a wasteland.

I walk on the outskirts of hell.

I want to give up.

I want to leave.

I want to be

The coward I am.

Is this the end?

Is it time to say goodbye?

Is this when I finally submit

To the razorblade’s kiss?

The skin on my wrist tingles…